Consumed by fire
by acacia6583
Summary: After being recruited into the Seattle Fire department, Bella goes out to celebrate. She sleeps with a gorgeous stranger but unbeknown to her he is her new colleague. Watch the sparks fly between them. All Human, rated M for mature themes and language.
1. Chapter 1

**Hiya guys! Here is the new story I was telling you about, I was going to wait untill Brand New Eyes had finished but this one was keeping me awake so I decided to write it.**

**Please let me know what you think of it?**

**Thank you to my awesome beta Magenta, and to Black Hale for reading this and giving me advice and spurring me on! You girls rock!**

**I don't own Twilight but I do own a heap of Twilight stuff!**

**Chapter 1 - A woman Scorned.**

I've never really been a typical 'girly girl'. I never played with Barbies or went to ballet, I was more than happy to be one of the guys and play football, the word dress was not in my vocabulary and I didn't own anything remotely feminine.

When I got older and started high school I started skating and doing everything the guys did, my dad used to say I should have been a boy. I was comfier wearing baggy jeans, a band t shirt with my dcs hanging off my feet.

I was about as feminine as hulk hogan was... which is not very much.

I remember when I first started developing breasts at 13, I was horrified. I would hold them bad boys down as best as I could!

It wasn't that I didn't want to be a girl, I'm not one of them girls that thinks I was born in the wrong body, I like boys, I just preffered to hang out with them and dress like them. And how was I meant to skate with my boobs flying all over the place throwing me off balance. No, I liked being one of the guys, they were less bitchy than my sister and her bunch of prima ballerina barbie clones.

Ahh my sister Rosalie. Where do I begin with her?

We were about as opposite as we could possibly get, she was tall leggy, blonde (dyed of course), had blue eyes like my father had the perfect complexion, wore the most hideous girlie outfits, she was head cheerleader and had all the guys fawning all over her.

Where as I was shorter, had dark hair, dark eyes, couldn't give a shit about my complexion and the only time guys were all over me was when I had managed to pull off a 360 Ollie on my skateboard without breaking a bone.

While she went to parties to make out with boys I was daring them to beer drinking contests. We were polar opposites and she never failed to let me know how much of an embarrassment I was to her and her friends. _Yeah tell someone who actually gives a shit!_

She was such a bitch, always sneering and whinging at someone, people were terrified of her and her band of merry skanks but I just rolled my eyes at them, they were not threatening in the slightest, I had seen them with out make up and believe me it was not a pretty site! Plus I could pack a punch so they knew not to mess with me.

Rose was 11 months older than me but she acted so much younger. We barely spoke to each other, only when we had to which was not very often. I kept out of her way and she kept out of mine.

I remember I came home one night after a party when I was about 17 and puked in her shoe cupboard and we got into a full on bitch fight, hair pulling, scratching, biting the lot... of course when Rose started doing that I punched her so hard in the face that she bounced on her arse and since then she had not done anything major to piss me off. I never understood why girls pulled hair? If your gonna fight at least do it properly like!

I'm not a violent person but I'm not a pushover either, so when she starts throwing her weight around I do too.

I was glad not to be a part of her little popular group, they were superficial, shallow and ugly on the inside.

I was happy, my best friends Mike, Jacob, Sam and Quill were all I needed.

When I was 15 though I started seeing Jake differently, he had made out with some freshman behind the gym during 4th period and I got so incredibly mad about it, I then realised I had a little crush on him, I told Mike who found it absolutely hilarious that I was acting like a girl but once I threatened to wrap my skateboard round his head he soon shut up.

Not that I ever would do that... I loved my board _far _too much to damage it on that fool's big head!

Jake was about 5ft 11, tanned and very muscular which was probably because he was always on his bmx or skating. He had short black hair and dark brown almost black eyes. He was gorgeous and in my opinion no one came close to being as good looking as him.

I remember getting drunk one night on cheap beer when I was about 17 and confessing to him that I liked him. I had suffered in silence for 2 years, watching girl after girl break his heart cos he was far too nice.

He was the kinda guy that would do anything for anyone and usually ended up getting taken advantage of and it made my blood boil that he didn't see it.

He had taken me home that night and rubbed my back as I puked all over his feet after admitting I was in love with him. There was definitely a common theme going on here with Mikes parties, beer and me throwing up.. I should really stop going out.

He was so shocked that he said nothing, I knew he didn't feel the same but I already had a plan to blame it on the alcohol and 'pretend' to forget all about it in the morning and never mention it again no matter how hard it was, I was one of the guys, I didn't get crushes.

So imagine my surprise when the next morning I woke in Jake's arms, he finally admitted he liked me too and I was over the moon.

We started seeing each other and I was the happiest I had ever been, my parents were over the moon, especially my dad who was best friends with Jake's father Billy.

They were already planning the wedding in their head. I was like whoaa now hold on like! I was not the long white dress and a fist full of flowers kinda girl, There was no wedding in my near future.

We eventually graduated high school and I went to the University of Washington to study law, my dad was so pleased by this as he wanted me to follow in his legal footsteps.. He was cheif of police in Forks but he wanted me to become a lawyer, I didn't really want to do it but it was an intersting subject and I wanted to make him proud so I followed the plan and off I went.

Jake attended the University of Seattle to study mechanical engineering.. _Yeah boring I know!_

Rose being the girlie girl she was also attended the university of Washington to do a degree in dance which interested me about as much as Jakes degree.

For the first year everything went amazingly, me and Rose actually started spending more time together, She had taken a year out to travel around Europe and after 6 months she came home . She had matured so much and was not the superficial bitch she once was.

We started College at the same time and lived just down the hall from each other. It was wierd actually, I had spent so much of my life hating her very existence and now I couldn't imagine life here without her.

I had stopped skating as much as I really didn't have the time nor anyone to skate with, my studying was demanding but I loved it, as much as I really did not want to be a lawyer I loved the subject.

I was still unsure what I wanted to do with my life, everyone around me seemed to know what they wanted to do but I was clueless. Me and Jake saw each other all the time, he seemed to love college life and was settling into things so well, he was really anxious about being away from me but we made it work.

In my second year I had a new room mate, Alice. She was a tiny bundle of energy that was way too happy in the mornings but she was awesome, Rose and her hit it off straight away talking about clothes and the latest gucci whatever on the market. I still wasn't interested in clothes or fashion even though they did everything they could to play dress up Bella and usually after days of nagging I gave in and let them make me over on the condition that they left me alone afterwards.

Jake had finally proposed to me in our third year of college on Valentines day. I was absolutely stunned and said yes, it was so out of the blue that I shocked into silence which is completely rare for me.

We had been together for a long time so naturally this was the next step for us but I just could not see myself getting married, having kids and settling down.... despite my love for him I just couldn't see it. Things would probably change when I finished college and we grew up though right?

I talked to the girls about my reservations and they said it was natural to be slightly apprehensive.

I was meant to meet Jake one Friday afternoon in March, we were going for dinner and a movie but he called me to say he wasn't feeling well so being the nice loving fiance I was I headed over to his dorm to take him some soup and maybe watch a movie there until he felt better.

I climbed in my old red truck that my dad had gotten me for my 16th birthday and headed over there to surprise him, I had tried calling him but he wasn't picking up so I assumed he was sleeping and headed over there anyway.

I knocked on his door but no one answered, I could hear muffled noises so I knew someone was in there, I pushed open the door and dropped the container of soup splattering it all over the wall, door and floor. Jake was in bed with some skank blonde bouncing up and down on top of him.

He was moaning and had his head thrown back, she had her filthy fake nails all over my mans chest, I wanted nothing more than to go over and grip her by the hair and fling her across the room but I was rooted to the spot, I just stood there staring unable to tear my eyes away from them.

Jake finally realised I was in the room and was horrified, he threw her off him and jumped up, he grabbed a towel and flew towards me, I just spun on my heel and marched down the hall with a half naked Jake coming after me.

People had appeared in the hallway to see what all the commotion was, I didn't cry and I didn't shout. I stopped and turned to face him, pulled my arm back and punched the son of a bitch so hard in the face I heard bone crunching.

I stormed off and headed back to my dorm, packed some stuff and high tailed it back to my dads in Forks.

I still hadn't cried, I was so fuckin angry that I wanted to murder someone, I wasn't one to cry normally, I hadn't cried in years and even now despite how angry I was I still couldn't do it. My mother always said men weren't worth my tears and she was so right.

I got to my dads but he was out, probably fishing or working or whatever.

I sat there fuming watching the football, usually I loved football but I couldn't see anything other than that hot blonde with _MY_ boyfriend.

Rose eventually called the house phone looking for me, I had shut my cell phone off so no one could contact me. No one being Jake. I had totally forgotten to tell Rose and Alice where I was, they were probably frantic with worry.

She said that Jake had been there looking for me and knew something was wrong as he was sporting a cracking black eye.

I told her what had happened and she went mental, she was about to go over there and beat his brains out but I convinced her I didn't want that and that he had already had a smack so he didn't need to do anything else.

I told her I would be back in a few days and that I just needed some time out. I fell asleep that night and dreamt of Jake and the blonde.

I woke in the morning after an extremely restless night and got in the shower, I still hadn't allowed myself to cry, I was stronger than crying over a bloke that had screwed me over!

The thing that I was most annoyed at was that I hadn't even seen this coming, there were no signs, nothing out of the ordinary so I was just dumb founded.

How could I have been so blind and stupid? I didn't get it, we were happy and it wasn't like he had no sex, we were at it like rabbits when ever we saw each other! Fuck him, and fuck her and not in the sexual way!

My dad was home when I finally came down on Saturday morning and knew something had happened when he saw my truck outside, but I just said I wanted a break and needed to clear my head. He didn't believe me, I could see that, but my dad was the kinda person that didn't push, he knew I would talk to him when I was ready. I was grateful for that.

On sunday after spending all Saturday with my dad watching football and eating Pizza I finally confessed what had happened. He was angry but was adamant that things would sort themselves out, he believed Jake acted stupidly but still believed that he loved me. _Yeah if only I could believe that. _

What I just couldn't understand was why the fuck would he propose to me and less than a month later cheat on me? What the fuck was that all about?

That afternoon I packed up my stuff and threw my bag in the truck, I needed to get back to school and didn't wanna be travelling back to Seattle in the dark.I got lost_ a lot _so driving in the dark was not a good idea for me.

I was just about to say goodbye to my dad when Jake's car pulled up and blocked me in. I could hear the damn thing a mile away, he had one of those huge arsed exhaust pipes that let the world know he was in the area. I hated it, It was loud and annoying.

'Ugh' I said out loud as he got out of the car.

'Bells, just please talk to me babe, I'm so so sorry' He said with his huge puppy dog eyes.

I might have fallen for that once but not now.

My dad told me he had to go to work, kissed me good bye and told Jake to sort his shit out and left. I told him I would call at the station before I left to see him. I think he just felt awkward witnessing this so he had made an excuse and left.

'Jake, leave me alone' I hissed.'And do _not_ fucking call me babe'

'No, not until you talk to me' He begged.

'I'm done talking to you, we. are. OVER' I over pronouced the last few words just in case he didn't realise what I was getting at.

I was not about to be walked all over by him, I was not weak.

I got into my truck and told him to move his car or I would reverse into it, the look on his face was priceless. His souped up little boy racing car was his pride and joy and he knew I always did what I said so before his car got squashed by a tonne of scrap metal he moved it.

I headed down to my dads work with fuck nut behind me, he wasn't gonna give up so I pulled over about a mile from the station and got out.

'Jake, what the fuck do you want?' I demanded.

'You' he replied.

'Bullshit' I spat 'If you wanted me you would not have been screwing around behind my back you fucking ass'

He blanced at this but he was not about to get way with this, I had never let anyone treat me so badly before, I wasn't about to start now.

'You think you can just say sorry and bat your eye lashes at me and this will all go away? I will _never _forgive you for this' I turned to walk away and he grabbed my arm, I looked at him with all the anger and hate I could muster and he glanced at the ground with his head down.

'Bella, I'm sorry, I was lonely... and bored'

I stopped dead in my tracks. Did I just hear that correctly? Was that meant to make me feel better?

'I'm sorry _WHAT_?, you were _BORED_? You ruined our fuckin relationship cos you were _bored_?'I spat at him.

I was seething, I don't think I had ever been so angry, I was literally shaking..

Oh he was going to pay for this and if looks could kill dear Jakey would be dead on the spot.

His phone started ringing, he pulled it out of his pocket and looked at the caller and turned around quickly to answer it, I heard him call someone baby and again my blood boiled.

Here he was trying to make things up to me yet he was on the phone to his skank on the side?

I saw red! I never fully understood that expression until now, I was such a mellow person by nature normally but I was so angry my vision was literally impaired by a red haze.

I stomped back to my car and leaned in and reached into the glove compartment, then grabbed the spare can of petrol I had in the back of my truck for emergencies and started pouring it all over the interior of his car, on his seats and dash board, and then all over the bonnet and roof.

He hadn't even noticed, he was too busy on the phone with his new fancy bit. He was talking in hushed tones to her so I couldn't hear what they were saying, I didn't need to know what they were saying, I had heard enough.

I honestly do not know what possessed me to do something so down right nasty but I wasn't thinking straight. I was a woman insane.

He turned around as I finshed emptying the can over the car and stared at me with his eyes wide and his mouth open. I threw the can on the floor, lifted open the zippo and flicked it at Jakes precious car.

I did what every cold blooded woman scorned would do in this situation.

I set fire to his fucking car!

**So, what do you all think? **

**This is totally different from my other story, I hope you like it!**

**Please let me know what you think:D**

**See you next time. Sae xxx **


	2. Chapter 2

**Righto here's the second chapter. I had planned on getting this up yesterday but RL got in the way.**

**Thank you as always to my incredible beta Magenta for checking over this before I make a twat of myself lol!**

**I dont own Twilight but I am now the new proud owner of a teeny tiny laptop that I can put in my handbag! **

**Chapter 2 : New Beginnings. **

I have no idea how long I stood there watching Jake's car burn to the ground but I remember seeing the fire fighters turn up and the police along with my dad who was extremely pissed off at his daughter the pyro.

Jake was prancing around with his arms flailing in the air, sobbing about his precious car, obviously it meant more to him than I ever did.

I should have felt really sad about what he had done and the way I was treated but I was totally numb.

My dad pulled me out of the way as the fire department did their job, he was shouting at me and I was just staring at the flames not registering what he was saying.

I should have been really concerned about being arrested and throw in jail for what I had done but quite frankly I could not give a shit.

I was totally mesmerized by the fire men and what they were doing. They were completely in sync,and their uniform was like really friggin cool.

I knew there and then I would not going to law school and not going to become a lawyer........

I was going to become a fire fighter with the Seattle fire department.

My dad shoved me in the police cruiser and drove me to the station where he proceeded to tell me how irresponsible I was and how I could have gotten myself or Jake killed. Not to mention the damage I had caused to Jake's car and how upset Billy was going to be when he explained.

Apparantly all that mattered was Jake and his fucking car, its not like I did it for no reason!

I knew Jake would be seriously pissed, hell Rose would be pissed - but that was nothing compared to how pissed my dad was. I had never seen him like this, sure he used to get annoyed when Jake would carry me home after I got drunk on cheap beer at one of Mikes parties but I had never seen him like this. You would think the police cheifs daughter would be a really good girl? I was the total opposite, I was always doing something to piss him off but most of the time he would just roll his eyes and then make a serious amount of noise the following morning knowing full well I was dying of a hangover!

I looked over at him, his eye was twitching and his face was all red. His brow was low and he was gripping the seat so hard I thought it would snap off in his hand! Apparently this time, I had _REALLY_ made him mad.

I thought the vein in his head was about to burst and his brain explode.

I started giggling at my vision which infuriated him even more.

'I'm glad you can see the funny side to this Bella, do you have any idea what you could have caused?'

I just shrugged, I didn't know nor did I actually care.

Fortunately for me Jake didn't want to pursue the matter any further, I was mildly surprised actually considering I had just blown his pride and joy to pieces, he was taking this rather well. But at the same time I couldn't help but think that if it wasn't for him thinking with his dick in the first place this would not have happened, so technically this was all his fault.

When I was finally released from the station I apologised to my dad for causing him embarrassment but made it clear I wasn't sorry for doing what I did. I left and hopped in my truck which had been brought from the main road to the station by one of my dads collegues, I got in, turned my phone on, I had 67 missed calls. What the fuck? I know I had my phone turned off for like 2 days but this was ridiculous

Most of them were off Jake from the day before but there was a few off Alice and Rose.

I called Rose to tell her I was about to take off and I would see her in a few hours.

'Lo?' She answered. Since when was she all ghetto?

'Rose?' I asked wondering why the hell she sounded like friggin Lil Kim.

'Yeah, sorry I was just trying something' She said casually.

'K, well don't. So, Im on my way home. I sorta had a little run in with Jake'

'He's there?' She asked sounding annoyed. I could just see her standing there with her hands on her hips tapping her foot on the hard wood in a pair of expensive shoes.

'Yeah, he's here. I dunno how hes gonna get home to Seattle though' I giggle snorted

'Why what happened? Did you break his legs?' She cackled.

'No....... But I did sorta blow up his car'

'_WHAT_?" Rose replied sounding completely confused and astounded at the same time.

'Yeah, he was pissing me off so I set fire to it'

'Oh my fucking god Bella your insane'

'I know right, dad was so totally pissed, I'm so lucky I'm not on my way to jail right now, you should have seen him Rose he looked like he was gonna pop a blood vessell.' I laughed and even she found this funny since my dad was so laid back normally.

'Has this taught you anything?' She asked

'Yes, I want to join the fire department' I replied confidently.

'What? No,Bella you have learned not to date cluster fucks.. right?'

'Oh right, yeah that too'

'Wait, you wanna join the _what_?'

'The fire department' I said nodding into my phone.

'_Why_? Imagine how dirty your gonna get. Your hair and your nails, Ugh'

'Rose, remember who your talking to here' I reminded her. As if I gave a crap about being covered in mud, I threw myself off skateboards for fun!

'Oh right, but yuk Bella you could do so much better'

'As much I would love to argue with you right now I really need to get home, I'll talk to you later.'

'Drive safe' She replied and I hung up.

So in the space of one weekend I had lost my fiance to a sleazy blonde haired barbie clone, wrecked said fiances car with petrol and fire, decided I wanted to ditch a future career in law enforcement for one in the fire department and pissed my dad off to the point of giving him a nervous breakdown. All in all I would say this weekend would be one I wasn't likely to forget in a long time!

* * * * * * * * *

I spent the next few months preparing for my finals, ditching calls and texts from Jake who miraculously still wanted to win me back and did all I could to get into the fire department!

I had to fill in a huge assed application form, sit a written exam, attend an oral interview, have a medical exam to make sure I was fit and healthy and not into drugs, I also then had to have a psychological examination and had a background check. Somehow I managed to pass all of the above flying colours. I was so worried my little stint as a pyromanic might stop me but as I wasn't actually arrested for it I was safe.

The perks of having a father in the police force I guess.

I was told I would be contacted if I was a sucessful candidate and I was praying I would be. I had put so much into this, I didn't want to fail now.

My finals were hard but I ploughed through and was pretty confident that I had done well, I had wanted to jack school in and concentrate on what I really wanted to do but I knew I was already pushing my dad to the brink of heart failure and it was always good to have something to fall back on right?

Alice had a year left of college after we left and was really upset about us leaving her to fend for herself, even though she was more than capable of living without us but never the less her and Rose had a brain wave and soon enough we were moving into our new $4000 a month apartment on the 25th floor in a complex called the Continental in Belltown.

I remember when she came home with the keys, she was so pleased, she was bouncing around the room like a rabbit on speed and I tried so hard to share her enthusiasm.

I didn't care where we lived, how good the views were or that there was a gym, spa and pool. All I heard was $4000 per month and 25th floor. Do you have any idea how high that is?

I would get vertigo just by looking out of the window. I was far from impressed.

Rose was all like 'You will love it Bella, just wait till you see the flooring'.

I remember thinking is it gold friggin plated? Cos for 4K a month it fucking well should be. Thank god we had a trust fund from our deceased Grandpa Swan or we would not have been able to get this place.

When we got there I was pretty impressed despite being like a million foot in the air.

It was an open planned kitchen dining and living room with huge glass windows that looked out over Seattle, I would imagine at night time it was stunning.

The kitchen had wooden cabinets with granite surfaces which was really very attractive.

It had 3 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms and was really nice. I probably would have just picked some tacky run down old town house in downtown Seattle but this was actually rather pretty. _There's hope for my sister yet!_

According to Rose it was within Walking distance (literally across the street) from lounges, restaurants, shops, Pike Place Market and the building offered amenities such as a 24 hour doorman, pool/spa/sauna, game room, lush roof deck, fitness room and is a great place to call home.

Apparantly Rose ate a real estate agent for brekfast, she had memorized everything.

It had a private balcony too which was just stunning, I could see myslef out there in the warm summer evenings reading books while the girls cooked me dinner. _Oh yeah, they would be cooking me dinner after I agreed to this insane idea._

My bedroom was huge and had a gorgeous view of Lake Union. It had a built in wardrobe and huge bookcase that was to die for.

_Yes, I would be very happy here._

About 2 months after we moved in I got the call to say I had made it through the first part of the actual fire training, I was over the moon. It was a 13 and a half week course that consisted of in class training and actual fire training and I couldn't wait to get started. It was going to be incredible.

Those 13 weeks completely kicked my arse, I was tested to my limits. It was physically and mentally draining but I loved it. I would come home at the end of the day shattered and ready to pass out but I knew it would be worth it. I understood that it would be a hard and gruelling process but I also knew what the outcome would be and I wanted this more than anything.

My dad was not impressed in the slighest when I told him what I was doing. I hadn't told him I had applied until I knew for sure that I had been a sucessful applicant, I didn't want him to be disapointed If I failed but he was not happy either way.

'No daughter of mine is doing something so dangerous and wreckless'He had ranted down the phone.

What, so it was ok if I wanted to become a cop which is just as if not _more_ dangerous than being a firefighter but its not ok for me to do this?

_How hypocritical._

He finally gave up trying to persuade me not to do it and I left it at that, we hadn't spoken in a little while.

My mother was super excited at the prospect of visiting me and seeing all those hunky men in uniform. Another reason for my dad to be pissed at me. They were happily married but she always used to say 'Whats the harm in a little window shopping ?' What indeed mother! Look where that got me and Jake!

I had expected my dad to be happy for me and proud of me no matter what but he just grumbled down the phone at me and told me 'do what you want'

Jake had given up contacting me too, it was fantastic, no more drunken texts and voice mails at 2 in the morning to deal with. Although we had moved, I had changed my cell number and email address and I was no longer in college so that might have been why he had stopped contacting me, but even so I was happy that he was no longer giving me grief.

Finally after a long hard 3 ish months I finally got what I wanted. I was now a fully fledged probationary firefighter. I did my happy dance around the living room in front of the girls who found my Chandler from friends impression absolutely hilarious but I was so happy I didn't care how stupid I looked!

I was friggin estatic and to celebrate we decided to hit the town and go clubbing. I was not normally the clubbing kinda girl I was happy to veg in front of the tv with a 6 pack and a football game but tonight I was on such a high that I wanted to celebrate in style.

I hadn't been out in a long time and I was in such a good mood I even let Rose and Alice play their favourite game and dress me as long as they didn't make me look like a cheap hooker.

Apparantly Alice was only offended by the term cheap and not hooker so I was dreading to think what I would look like.

At 9pm that night we were showered, shaved, primped and pruned and ready to hit the town.

Alice had dressed me in a blue off the shoulder top, skinny jeans and open toed high heels, I looked pretty damn good,if I do say so myself. Alice had exceeded herself this time..

My hair was loose and curled down my back and I had smokey eye make up.

_Wow, so I could look feminine if I wanted to._

If only Jake could see me like this!

Hah, he would never get a chance to see this again, he blew that when he let that whore climb on his cock.

We hit the bars and by 11pm I was hammered. I had had so many cocktails, shots of vodka and tequila that the room was spinning and I was seeing double.

I left Alice sucking face with some guy and started dancing on my own, I never danced, another example of how incredibly wasted I actually was. I had no idea where Rose had gotten to, she was probably chatting up the bar tender to get us free drinks, although I knew I had had quite enough alcohol.

I can't remember what I was dancing to, but it had a really good beat and eventually I felt hands on my waist and a body pressing up behind me. Now normally I would have pushed them off and slapped who ever it was for being so rude but I felt for the first time in years really desirable and just went with it.

The person was gyrating up behind me and was obviously enjoying himself as I could feel his hard on against my backside.

He moved my hair over to one shoulder and started nibbling on my neck, it was an incredible feeling and I was seriously turned on.

I normally had a problem with suchs shows of public affection but for some reason I was not bothered by it at all tonight.

I was praying this guy wasnt some ugly fucker, I wanted to turn around and see who was making me feel so damn sexy but I was worried incase he happened to look like Ben Stiller or someone equally as gross.

He kept on kissing my neck and ear and I moaned, in the middle of the dancefloor I_ moaned_ at some guy sucking on my throat. How fuckin attractive is that eh?

I turned around to face him and got a face full of chest, this boy had a gorgous body, I ran my hands up his chest and up his shoulders, he buried his face in the crook of my neck again while his hands roamed my backside.

He pulled his face back and I was finally able to get a look at the man that made me feel so damn horny. He had the most stunning jaw, a gloriously straight nose and eyes that would melt even the coldest hair was all over the place but it made him look so damn sexy and shit he smelled yummy, I think he was wearing Joop? That was one of the sexiest smells on a guy in my opinion.

_Wow, I bagged me a stunner._

It had been so long since I had gotten laid that I was beyond horny and this guy was making my body feel things it had never felt before. I felt like I was on fire.

I looked into his eyes and he smiled down at me. _Whoaa what a sexy smile._

'Hi' he said

'Hi' I replied feeling especially his voice sent shivers down my spine.

He rubbed my cheek with the back of his hand and lent down to kiss me, his lips met mine and it was one of the single most erotic kisses in my life.

We stood on the dance floor for maybe 20 minutes kissing and sucking before either of us spoke again.

'You wanna get out of here?' He asked once he had broken away from another kiss.

My eyes were still closed, there was a very good chance I had lost my voice so I just nodded.

He smiled, grabbed my hand and pulled me towards the exit. I didn't see either Alice or my sister so we just left.

He hailed a taxi and we hopped in.

'Your place?' he asked.

'Er no, not a good idea. I live with 2 really nosey girls who have no qualms invading my personal space'

He chuckled and told the driver to head to the nearest hotel.

I did wonder why he hadn't offered to take me to his place but I was getting laid so who the fuck cared where we were! As long as we weren't interrupted I was happy.

Internally I was like a giddy little school girl but I was really nervous, I had only slept with Jake and that wasn't exactly mind blowing. What if I did something wrong?

'You ok?' He asked me taking my hand.

I nodded and smiled at him. He smiled back and it almost knocked the wind out of me.

Suddenly I was aware that I didn't even know mr sexy pants's name. How friggin stupid was that? Well less stupid than leaving a club drunk out of my mind with a bloke I didn't even know to have mind blowing sex with.

'What's your name?'I blurted out.

'I'm Edward' He smiled. Ahh so he had a name, quite an old fashioned name but I didn't care, he was gorgeous and he was attracted to me. That's all that mattered.

'I'm Bella' I replied holding out my hand which again seemed dumb as 5 minutes ago I was sucking face with him.

He smiled a seriously sexy smile and shook my hand.

We pulled up outside a hotel or whatever it was and hopped out, he checked us into a room and we headed to the elevator where we spent the entire time groping and kissing.

If I died right now kissing this sex god I would die a very happy girl.

We made it to the room and he pinned me against a wall, kissing me, nibbling my neck and touching my ass again.

I stated unbuttoning his shirt and pushed it off his shoulders, wow he had some sexy ass shoulders, he had a small amount of hair on his chest and a gorgeous six pack. He obviously works out.

I ran my hands over his shoulders and up along the back of his neck and ran my fingers through his browny reddish hair. It was sticking up all over the place and did wonderful things to my lady bits for sure.

It was only now in the light that I noticed he had the most incredibly intense eyes I had ever seen. They were green with traces of brown in them and really bright.

He plunged his tongue into my mouth and nibbled on my lip, it was so sexy, I had never been so turned on by a kiss before. He reached his hand under my top making me gasp at the skin on skin contact. My top was slowly peeled off and disguarded on the floor. I was standing there in my bra, feeling rather exposed but he seemed mesmerized by my breasts and started kissing the exposed parts.

He suddenly grabbed me by my waist, picked me up and lay me on the bed, lying on top of me.

Automatically my hips bucked to meet his, and he smiled against my mouth at my eagerness.

He kissed a trail down my jaw and neck, along my collar bone, down my breasts and across my stomach making me gasp and break out in goose bumps. His touch was incredible. I kicked off my shoes and they landed on the floor with a thud.

He slowly undid my jeans and peeled them off me leaving me lying in front of him on the bed in just my underwear.

He slid back up me and kissed me again with some serious passion.

'You are fucking stunning' He whispered against my neck.

I had nothing to say, I was completely speechless and totally loving how I was feeling.

I pushed his shoulders back and he lay back on the bed, I straddled him and kissed him some more, he sat up and pulled me closer to him, I could feel how much he was enjoying this too through my lacy knickers. I made a mental note to thank Alice in the morning for dressing me up properly and not letting me wear the boy shorts I had fought so hard to wear.

I slid off his shoes and jeans and dumped them at the bottom of the bed in a heap. He was incredible and amazingly good looking, I had never ever come across someone so stunning before. I crawled back up to him and staddled him again, I could feel him straining through his boxers pressing against me and it made me moan. He reached up and moved my hair and undid my bra letting my boobs bounce free. They weren't huge but they weren't tiny either, they were decent and obviously Edward appreciated them.

He wrapped his arm completely around me and flipped me over so that I was now under neath him on the bed. He licked and nibbled on my nipples causing me to gasp and buck my hips against him again.

'So impatient' He chucked against my skin.

'Don't tease me' I panted.

He laughed again while kissing me and it vibrated through out my body. He slid down me and stripped me of my under wear. I was beggining to get slightly paranoid as he kept staring at me but when I looked into his eyes all I saw was lust and that turned me on even more.

He reached into his jacket pocket and grabbed a foil packet and put it on the bedside table and then took off his boxers. I would so have to thank who ever made those boxers cos they were incredible on him.

He slid back onto the bed smiling and kissed me again, god I could lay here all day kissing him, it was all kinds of amazing.

He slowly reached down and put his fingers between my legs.

'Is this ok?' He asked while gazing into my eyes.

'Yes' I begged.

He smiled and then plunged his fingers inside me I gasped and squirmed beneath him. With Jake there was no foreplay it was wham bam thank you maam sorta thing. I was lucky if I came at all.

He slid his fingers into me again and I moaned like a cheap porn star. _Wow that was nice, not the moaning, the fingers._

He started pumping in and out of me while kissing me and biting on my neck.

'Cum for me baby' He huskily whispered.

'Unghhhh' Was all I managed to get out.

'I'm gonna make you feel so fucking good' He breathed into my neck.

I reached down and grabbed his dick, he had started to dry hump my thigh and it was actually kinda painful so I grabbed it and started pumping away while he finger fucked me.

My heart was beating like a drum and I was breathing extremely rapidly. I felt the muscles in my stomach begin to tighten and my legs started tingling.

I knew I was close. I was bucking my hips wildly against his hand while he whispered dirty yet incredibly sexy things into my ear.

I finally exploded and screamed out, calling his name. Shit that was intense.I knew I was the same colour as a beetroot, I could feel myself flushing.

'Was that good baby?' Edward asked me while sucking my ear lobe.

'You have no idea' I chuckled back to him.

'Been a while huh?' Yeah he was a cocky bastard but I loved it.

'A while' I agreed.

'Well, we will just have to fix that now wont we?' He smiled as he kissed me again.

He reached up, opened the foil packet and slid the condom over his extremely erect penis.

He lay in between my legs and positioned himself at my enterance.

'You ready?' He asked as he kissed my nipples.

'Uh huh' I managed to breathe out.

He slowly slid into me while making the most incredible sounds.

Knowing that I had caused him to moan like that was turning me on so damn much.

When he was finally all the way in he started rocking gently against me, the feeling was completely incredible.

'Unngh, Bella, so good' He breathed.

I moaned and started liting my hips to meet his thrusts.

After a few minutes I was flipped over on top of Edward so that I was straddling him. He grabbed my hips and started pulling me down harder and faster.

It was completely amazing, I have never felt so much pleasure in my life.

I couldn't think about anything other than the incredible pleasure between my legs and the gorgeous man that had caused it.

He sat up and wrapped his arms around me so that I was against his chest while he slammed into me. I could hear his heart beat, it was just as wild as mine.

He moaned again sending a tingle down my spine, that sound sent my clit into spasm.

'Oh god I'm close' I grunted into his ear

'Come on baby, cum for me again' He gasped as he clutched at my hips.

I felt my stomach muscles tighten and started moaning uncontrollably into this gorgeous mans neck.

I could feel myself getting really hot and flushed again and then I exploded for a second time. My vagina was pulsating like crazy. Fuck, that one was even more intense than the first one.

Edward gripped my hips tightly while thrusting into me and grunted into my neck, I could feel him tense and spill into the condom he grunted again and eventually stopped thrusting and relaxed into my shoulder.

We sat there breathing eratically for a good 5 minutes before I moved off him, pulling his dick from me.

I lay on the bed panting with him next to me. What the hell did I do now?

Did I stay here and run while he was asleep? Or say thanks for the shagging of my life, I'll be off now?

I looked over at him and he was staring at me.

'What?' I asked. I couldn't help the smile that was on my face.

'That was ... just.. wow' he panted out.

'Yeah, it really was' I said back

'Are you ok?' He asked me looking concerned.

'Im more than ok, that was brilliant. You know, I dont do this' I motioned with my hand between us 'Very often, in fact that was the first time'

'Me either' He beamed at me.

I was suddenly very aware that I was naked and I pulled the blankets over me.

He put his arm around me and we lay next to each other naked and sweaty after some seriously fuck hot sex not saying a word.

I was tired after that work out and eventually fell asleep in his arms with my head on his chest to the feeling of him tickling my back with his finger.

I woke up in the morning in the expensive hotel room after the most peaeceful nights sleep and rolled over onto my back, I though I might have had a killer hangover but other than some soreness in my fadge I felt great.

I remembered the incredble sex I had last night and turned to the man that gave me the amazing orgasms but I found the bed was empty. The sheets and pillow was cold indicating that he hadn't just left. He must have snuck out while I was sleeping. I must admit I was kinda disapointed that Edward obviously considered last night a one night stand but I wasn't gonna go all stalker chick on him so I got up and made my way to the shower.

He had paid for the room for the night so I might as well take advantage of it.

I finally got dried and dressed in last nights clothes and made the bed. I was not looking forward to doing the walk of shame but all I wanted to do now was go home, eat greasy fried food and tell the girls about my night.

I picked up my bag and noticed there was a note on the bedside table.

_**Bella,**_

_** I had an incredible time last night thank you.**_

_** Sorry I couldn't stay, I had to work early.**_

_** Call me: 202 566 8474**_

_** Edward**_

_** x**_

**So what do you all think? That was my first ever lemon. It took me 2 hours and half a bottle of Archers to write that lol!**

**Please lemme know? Cheers all xxxxx**


	3. Chapter 3

**Hola dudettes, Here is the update for the week! I hope you like it, a LOT of research went into this chappie and to be honest I loved it. **

**Thanks to my awesome beta Magenta. If you haven't read her story Angel of War, get over there and read it, its all kinds of amazing!! I dont own Twilight and all that lot......**

**So, here is chapter 3 :**

**Fire house 8**

I rode home in the cab with the biggest grin on my face, not only had I gotten laid last night by the most incredible creature I was now a fully fledged probationary fire fighter!

My life was going so well, I must have done something good in a past life to deserve this!

As I snuck in the house I was busted by Alice who was sat at the dining room table drinking coffee.

"Good night?" She said while eyeing me up and down.

''The best" I gushed sitting next to her.

''Oh my god, you got some didn't you?'' She said her hand flying to her mouth.

''I did''. I beamed back.

''OH MY GOSH, I'm sooooo proud of you'' She hugged me and I laughed at her. _God anyone would think I have never been laid before._

''So, what was he like? Did you meet him at the club? Was he hot?''

I laughed again at my friends enthusiasm about the fact that I had just gotten laid.

''He was amazing Ally, he did ALL the right things if you get me, he was gorgeous, tall, muscly and an amazing kisser''

''Aww, I'm so pleased your getting over the other loser'' She said.

''I know right, I met him at the club. He started dancing with me so I just went with it and the next thing I know hes rubbing himself against me and we are kissing in a cab, but it was incredible''

''Did you get his number?''

''I sure did but I don't think I'm gonna call him''

''What? Why not?'' Alice said stunned.

Yeah he was gorgeous and fantastic in bed but he skipped out so obviously I was nothing more than a one night stand which surprisingly I wasn't even upset about. I wasn't looking for a relationship right now, not after getting rid of Jake and I had so much to concentrate on I didn't need a guy distracting me and complicating things with his gorgeousness and incredibly sexy potty mouth.

''It's not the right time Alice'' I replied.

''Alright'' She smiled.

''So who was the guy I saw you sucking face with last night?'' I said changing the direction of the conversation.

''Oh wow you saw that?'' She said turning a lovely shade of crimson which was not like her at all. Alice Brandon did not blush

''Yeah I saw, so spill'' I pressed.

''I didn't even get his name, He was gorgeous though, messy hair, sexy eyes and a gorgeous voice'' _Yeah that sounded familiar._

''We kissed for a while and then he went looking for his friends. He said he would come find me but Rose threw up all over the barman so we had to leave before we were thrown out''

''Oh my god, she did _what?''_ This amused me no end, Rose was usually so composed and didn't drink that much but according to Alice she was wasted, I so wish I had been there to see that.... _No scrap that, I dont... cos then I wouldn't have had the most incredible shag of my life!_

''Hah Bella it was hilarious, she was up half the night puking up Jager Bombs. It totally serves her right today if shes dying''

I made us some coffee and we chatted for a while before she had to go to work. So I said my goodbye's and crawled back into bed for a few hours, the lack of sleep catching up on me from the night before.

I still had a few more weeks of training to go but I was assigned to firehouse 8 on Lee Steet which wasn't that far away from where we lived. Probably about a 10 minute drive depending on traffic.

As I was a probie I would be pretty much be doing mundane tasks like keeping the firehouse clean, making coffee, and it was to last for 12 months! I didn't even care cos I had made it, I was so happy my jaw ached from smiling too much.

I had been informed that I would be joining the rest of the crew on call outs but not for the first few months until I settled in and learned the ropes. They wanted to see if I had retained any of the information I had been taught in basic training. I was pretty sure I had remembered most of everything but when in a real situation I wasn't sure how I would react.

I was so nervous yet completely exhilarated. I couldn't wait to get stuck in.

I was informed that I would be only female firefighter on this team which immediatly made me nervous, it was almost like I would have to prove myself to the guys, prove that I was good enough but I had always managed to fit in with the guys before so it shouldn't be a problem now. _I hoped._

I was also told a long with me there would be another male Probationary officer too, so at least I had someone to share the experience with and someone to befriend me, we were both in the same boat after all right?

A few weeks later I started at the firehouse, I was to be there at 7am on Monday morning so I went to bed early the night before and got up at 4am to shower, and dress in my navy blue department issue button up shirt with Seattle Fire Department on the back and a few badges on the front and my name sewn above the right breast pocket. I had to wear dark navy slacks and steel toe capped boots that weighed a tonne, they made me feel like I was walking in damn moon boots... not that I had ever worn them before but I could imagine what they felt like after wearing these. I put my hair up in a pony tail so it wasn't all over my face.

I grabbed my bag with a spare pair of civilian clothes, my phone, my wallet and my keys and left the girls a note saying I had gone to work to wish my luck and that I would call them later to let them know how it was going.

I hit the road at 5.45am, making it to the fire house for just before 6am, an hour before I was due to be there. I wanted to make a good impression not make them thing I was brown nosing so as I stepped out of my truck I contemplated getting back in and driving around for a bit.

As I was about to high tail it out of there a huge brute of a man appeared with the cutest smile on his face, he was about 6ft 6, built like a brick shit house, you know the type. He was huge, he looked like he should have been a wrestling ring with Triple H not here at the fire department.

"Hi there' He said as he walked towards me 'You must be Isabella Swan?"

"Yeah, Hi but call me Bella please" I replied feeling seriously nervous. I could do this... right?

He reched out his hand and shook mine, introducing himself as Emmett McCarty.

''Well come on in, your a bit early, everyone is still sleeping we had a call out at 1 this morning so the guys are sleeping it off.''

''Ok'' I dumbly replied.

He showed me around the fire house, it was a huge building 3 stories high. The ground floor was where all the engines were housed, the second floor was where their kitchen and social area was and where locker room and bathrooms were and the top floor was where the fire fighters slept when they were on a night shift.

He explained that they worked on a Kelly shift schedule, so they worked 24 hours on and then had 48 hours off, during the 24 hours we had to stay at the station unless responding to a call out.

He made me a coffee and asked about myself, I told him I was from Forks, just finished College and was really excited about starting work even if I was slightly nervous.

He explained they were 1 man down at the moment as one of the guys had injured his foot falling through rotten floor boards during a call had been off for a week already and was likely to be off for another 4 weeks before returning to active duty so I needed to pull my weight to compensate for the fact that they were low on staff.

At about 6.30 am A shift started rising, they were off now for 48 hours and B shift was in for 24 hours.

I met most of the guys before they went home for 2 days, they seemed like really nice guys. They were all welcoming and told me they looked forward to working with me in the future.

It made settling in a lot easier for me, I really prayed that no one would be a douche about the fact that I was the only woman on the team.

At 6.45 the other probie turned up, his name was Embry , he looked kinda familiar but I couldn't place him. He seemed nice enough, he was about 5 ft 9 quite muscly on top and was kinda dark skinned. He had a bright smile and big reminded me of Jake in a way.

B shift slowly started filtering in and we were introduced to them one at a time. They were all a really nice bunch of guys.

The guy I had met when I arrived was Emmett McCarty, I met Jasper Whitlock, Aaron Martin, Kevin Jones, Riley Santiago and Paul Scott. I would never rememer all those names.

Our Lieutenant was a guy named Maurice Buckman but everyone called him Buck or Lieu for short. I had yet to meet him but I was informed once he was in we would be called and he would assign us our duties for the day. McCarty told me he was a really good guy, as long as we knuckled down and did what our job then he was generally pretty mellow. He sounded like a decent guy.

In the mean time I made myself useful and cooked the guys breakfast, made thier coffee and generally cleaned up. It wasn't a dirty place but it was seriously lacking in the 'home' department and if I was going to be spending the majority of time in here I was going to make it as clean, tidy and accessible as possible.

While I was doing this, McCarty took Embry to put up the flags and wash down the engines as they were filthy.

I didn't mind doing the stereotypical women's work as cleaning really did sooth me.

I met the Lieutenant who was an oldish man probably in his late 40's. He had a very welcoming smile and a charming manner. He introduced himself and said that the first few days for us were about filling in paper work and doing the tasks that the fire fighters couldn't do due to being out on calls.

I didn't care what I was doing, I was more than willing to anything that was thrown at me, I wanted to prove myself to be a valuable member of the company and if that meant emptying the bins and cleaning the shelves then so be it.

He took us out to where the engines were kept and showed us all the equiptment, it was to be checked at the beginning of every shift and the end to ensure it was all there and in working order.

We were shown where the hand tools such as flat -head and the pick -head axes were, the flashlights and the K-12 circular saws were.

We were also shown the Jaws of life which I found completely fascinating. I had seen them used before on tv and that and was really looking forward to having a go on them.

We were also shown the room where the Personal protective equiptment was stored, all the guys's turnout jackets and pants were hung in lockers with their names above them with their helmets above them. There were 2 empty lockers with Mine and Embry's names above them, I beamed with pride knowing that I had my own locker, something so simple but it made me feel part of the team.

I personally loved messing with the thermal imaging camera, it was such an incredible piece of technology. Lieu explained it was used to determine the seat of a fire and to see if there were any more hot spots once the fire was put out, to detect whether electrical wiring was overheating and most importantly to detect if someone was trapped in a fire but because of the smoke they were not visible.

At about 8.30 am the Alarm bells started ringing and everyone sprung into action. They grabbed their gear from the lockers, and started flinging them on, they were so fast and fluid it was a highly incredible sight. Whitlock grabbed his helmet, and threw it on before winking at me and racing to jump in the engine. I was totally in awe, I couldn't wait to do that.

Lieu informed us that the call was to a local high school, there had been reports that smoke was pouring from the gym behind the school so they had to race to get there to put it out and make sure no one was on the premises.

Embry and myself stayed behind to sweep where the engines had been, I then trecked up stairs and made all the beds, putting my bag down on one of the ones that was already made, it was closest to the window and looked down across Lee Street. I took out my belongings and put them into the locker beside my bed.

I loved it here already, I could see that I would fit in perfectly.

The next few weeks flew past, Embry had been taken out on a few jobs,and I have to admit I was kinda jealous but I knew I would get my time. I loved the atmostphere in the fire house, we were like one big family. Everyone was so nice to me it made me feel like I had been here forever. We sat and watched football games when we had nothing else to do or I would run on the treadmill until my legs ached. I had to keep fit or I would be dragging my ass. I was informed that we were only as strong as the weakest link, and I had no intention of ever becoming the weak link. I laughed and joked with the guys, they treated me like I was one of the team, like I had been there forever and not like some fumbling newbie. They didn't care about the fact that I was a woman and seemed to take to me being there very well, I loved it. We had an incredible work atmosphere going.

The only down fall was that I hardly got to see Rose and Alice. They were either working or studying. Rose had gotten a part in a production of swan lake, which was rather appropriate considering Swan was our surname and Alice was working part time in a coffee shop across the road from our apartment as well as still being in school.

I really missed them. As irritating as they both could be at times I was lost without them. We would talk on the phone or text but it wasn't the same. I missed the female company. Something I thought I would never miss.

I cooked for the guys every time I was on shift and made extra for the boys on the other shifts, they had told me a few weeks before that no one could cook so they lived off junk food. They had a really good, modern kitchen it was a shame to see it go to waste so I would make all sorts for them in between calls. I had even started cooking at home much to the girls' amusement. But there was no way in hell I was getting fat off crappy take away food so I didn't mind cooking for them.

One friday morning I was finishing up checking the safety equiptment and sorting out the boys's clothes when I heard Whitlock shouting for me.

'Yeah' I yelled down to him.

'You got a visitor' He shouted back.

A visitor? As long as it wasn't Jake I didn't care who it was.

I stepped down the stairs to see my sister looking around completely gobsmacked. I rolled my eyes at her standing there taking everything in in awe, she had never been here before and by the looks of it she had never seen the inside of a fire station before. I smiled and walked towards her.

''Rose, what are you doing here?'' I asked her giving her a hug. I hadn't seen her in about 4 days so this was a nice surprise.

''Hey'' She said ''I came to see you, I brought you guys cookies''

Cookies ? Yeah the ones_ I_ had baked the night before.

What was she up to?

''Rose? Whats going on?'' I asked her putting my hands on my hips eyeing her sceptically.

''Oh nothing, I just wanted to come and see you and check out the guys... erm I mean the place you work in'' I chucked, I knew it had to be some other reason than to visit her sister. She wanted to check out the guys.

''Yo Swan'' McCarty called.

''What?'' I yelled back as he sauntered towards us with the biggest grin on his face.

''So, you gonna introduce us to your friend?'' He asked while whiggling his eyebrows at me. _Oh for the love of god. _I just rolled my eyes as they made googly eyes at each other.

''Rose this is McCarty, McCarty this is my sister Rose''

He reached for her hand and kissed the back of it. ''Call me Emmett'' He smiled, being the charming sod I knew he could be.

I adored him, he was so down to earth and nice, yes he was good looking but I had no intention of being attracted to any of the guys and risk my job in any way shape or form.

They chatted for a while and then Rose said she had to leave to get to work. She handed me the container of cookies and kissed me on the cheek and told me to call her, no doubt to give her the low down on McCarty.

As she left he nudged me in the shoulder with his. I looked up and he was grinning down at me.

''What?'' I asked

''Your sister is HOT''

''Alrighty then, now that is cleared up I'm gonna get back to work'' I replied rolling my eyes again and walking towards the stairs.

''No wait , you totally have to hook me up with her'' He begged.

''No! No way. This is gonna get complicated, you don't know my sister she is....... hard work''

''Swan pleeeeeeeeeeeeeease'' He whined , flashing me his pearly whites.

''Fine.'' I conceeded ''But if you hurt her I'll use the jaws of life on your dick. Got it?''

He smiled at me again flashing me his dimples, he grabbed me in a massive bear hug and swung me around making me feel seriously dizzy.

''McCarty put me down before I hurl on you man'' I laughed.

I heard a car door slam outside and heard Whitlock in the background, he was calling someone called Masen.

''Yo Masen your back? Dude how the fuck are you?" McCarty yelled as he let me go.

This must have been the guy that I was yet to meet as he injured his foot a month or so back. He was the only member of the team I was yet to meet but I had heard some incredible things about him, he was a highly regarded member of the team.

McCarty moved out of the way so I had view of this Masen guy, I took one look at him and felt like I had been punched in the gut, the wind had completely been knocked out of me.

I must have stood there for a few minutes looking like some kind of spaz. He just looked at me as though I _was_ a spaz. He kept narrowing his eyes looking at me. _Oh dear god, why why WHY must you be so mean to me?_

He was talking to the guys and looked like he was about to head over to me when the car door opened and in tottered some woman, she planted a huge kiss on him before looking over his shoulder and giving me a death glare. She was obviously letting me know that he was taken. I was fucking gob-smacked.

Masen was Edward... My Mr Sexy Pants Edward from the club. And he had a girlfriend, one that he failed to tell me about before sleeping with me.

Ahhhh crap, this just got _really_ complicated.

**So, what do you all think?**

**Do you like it so far?**

**Let me know xxxxxxxx **


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey Ladies. Thank you so much for all your reviews last time it totally made me smile. This is the first time I've written from a blokes point of view so I hope it doesnt suck too much. It did take me ages actually.**

**Thank you to my awesome beta Magenta for doing her thing while working 24 hour shifts. You are incredible!!**

**I don't own Twilight......**

**Chapter 4 :Just my luck.**

**Edward**

I needed a serious blow out! I didn't drink very often but after this week I sure as hell needed it.

It had been officially the week from hell, nothing would be able to top this. I would put money on it.

Me and Lauren had gotten 'engaged' - yeah don't ask.

An old lady had died because of some idiots incompetance and I heard we were likely to be assigned 2 new rookies. As I said.. a fucking fantastic week.

I had nothing against rookies but the last thing I wanted on my plate was doing my job and thiers as they didn't have a fucking clue how to do the job and expected us to puppy walk them through everything.

On Monday this week some retard parked _right_ outside the fire house, who fucking does that? We had no way of responding to the fire call we had just received. We couldn't get the damn car moved so in my rage I ploughed straight through that fucker with the truck, that would teach the moron not to park in front of an emergency service vehicle!

And cos we were delayed an old lady had died of smoke inhalation before we got a chance to get her out of the building. I was so fucking annoyed at some peoples blatant disregard for anyone but themselves!

The cops wrote that punk up but even though he technically was responsible for that poor old ladies death he wasn't arrested for it. He got a fine instead! _Where's the fucking justice in that?_

I told the guys I would meet them at the club at 11pm on Friday night, It took me hours to get rid of Lauren, she wanted to come with me but she was smothering me so I told her it was a guys only night and no one else would be taking their girlfriends so she would have no one to talk to while we talked football and work. I didn't have the heart to tell her I just didn't want her to come, I had no idea if the other guys were bringing anyone I just knew I didn't want her there draped over me all night like a rash.

Lauren was meant to be a bit of fun, a casual fuck if you like but she just kept coming back and christ she was clingy.

She was about 5ft 4, kinda big boobs, brown curly permed type hair and a big nose! I was off my face the night we met and she seemed alright at the time. Beer goggles and all that. The next morning when I woke up next to her I contemplated chopping off my arm just to run out of there before she woke, but being the unlucky shit I am she woke and told me it was the best night of her life and she was so happy.

Alarm bells started ringing when 3 days after we met she told me she was in love with me._ I know, weird right?_ I knew there and then I needed to end things but it was like she knew when I was about to finish her and would either leave before I had the chance to, or burst into tears and tell me that she had had a terrible day in work.

She constantly rang me at work which pissed Lieu off, she came to my apartment uninvited all the time and would let her self in with a key she copied. She had taken mine while I was sleeping and got one cut. How sneaky is that huh? Her turning up unannounced pissed me off even more as I roomed with McCarty who ridiculed me something chronic about her. What was I supposed to do? I didn't wanna be a bastard but at the same time I really had enough of our 'relationship'l.

I wasn't in love with her, I was barely attracted to her and she was almost impossible to get rid of.

Now when I say we got engaged it _totally _was an accident. My mother Esme loves rubies, they are her favourite gem and my mother means the world to me. I'm by no means a spoiled mama's boy but I totally adore her.

She had been through a lot since she split with my biological sperm donor 10 years before. He used to knock lumps out of her when we lived in Chicago, But as a 15 year old boy what could I do?

I defended her as much as I could but I used to end up getting a beating too. She would beg me not to get in his way but I couldn't just stand there and let that bastard hit my mom for not ironing his damn pants the way he liked them!

Eventually my mother left him and we fled to Washington with pretty much just the clothes on our backs. Thankfully he had never found us and 5 years ago my mother married my step father Carlisle. He was an alright guy, a paediatric surgeon.

He treated me like a son and gave me everything I ever wanted, a car, a place to live and a huge allowance. He adored my mother and treated her the way she deserved to be treated so in my book he was decent!

I saw this pretty little ruby ring in the window of an antiques shop as I was walking to work one morning and knew my mom would love it, It wasn't her birthday or anything like that but I knew she would adore it, so after buying it I stuck it in the pocket of my jacket.

Lauren and I were meeting her family that evening for dinner in a cute little Italian restaurant as she called it. I couldn't care less where we ate as long as I was fed, I was starving. None of the boys at the firehouse could cook so we lived on take out or burnt toast!

I had finished work late and dived into the shower. I grabbed my coat before I had a chance to take the ring out of the pocket and jumped in my car heading to the restaurant.

I was late by about 20 minutes but her family understood I had a very demanding job, we didn't work 9-5 and I couldn't just clock out if we were in the middle of a call.

I got there and sat down, flopping my coat over the back of the seat. Of course the damn box fell out and Lauren picked it up and opened it. _The nosey bitch!_

She instantly started squealing and jumping around, shouting Yes!

I wondered what the hell she was doing but then I clocked the ring in her hand. This was your ideal face palm moment!

I could have died, she thought I was proposing to her. I could hardly tell her it was a mistake in front of her parents who were equally as excited about my 'proposal'.

I was fucking horrified! As she hugged me I just stood there wondering what the fuck had happened and how I had managed to get myself into such a ridiculous situation in the first place. McCarty thought it was fucking hilarious when I told him, so much so that he actually choked on the beef jerky he was chewing on. That would serve him right for making fun of something so god damn tragic. It was not funny... It was horrendous.

Now I'm stuck engaged to a woman that can't even give me a decent blowjob, fucking great eh?

I tried everything to get rid of her, I was such as ass to her but she seemed only more determined to want to 'change me'. I wasn't an asshole by nature but desperate times and all that. My mom would be horrified if she knew I was treating a lady that way!

I needed to get out and drink myself into oblivion!

I got to the bar, McCarty had stayed at work to work on C shift as they were a man down and needed cover so it was Whitlock, myself and a few guys from A shift.

I was pretty damn drunk on my good friend Jack when I saw her on the dancefloor all by herself.

This brown haired beauty swaying to the music on her own. I fuckin hated 50 Cent but she made it sound sexy, _How fuckin retarded is that?_

Whitlock had picked up some short chick and was making out with her and the other guys had gone off to do their own thing. I couldn't help but stare at her, her ass was incredible!

Without realising what the fuck I was doing I made my way over to her and started dancing with her. She had an incredible body and her smell alone got me hard, she was rubbing her ass against me on purpose so I knew she was enjoying this as much as I was.

My hands were on her waist and I was swaying with her to the music, I knew she was gorgeous and I hadn't even seen her face yet.

I moved her hair to reveal her bare neck and kissed it a few times, I heard her gasp but that just turned me on even more. She was by far the most gorgeous woman I had ever met.. well technically we hadn't met yet but you get my drift.

She turned to look at me and I was lost in incredibly deep brown eyes. _Oh she was so getting it tonight I thought crudelly._ Even her voice when she said hi to me made me even harder.

I lent down and kissed her, sending my dick into a raging spasm.

_Oh dear god, we had better leave now before I fuck her on the dance floor._

Now, I hadn't once cheated on Lauren since we had been 'together' I wasn't that kinda guy but I just could not help myself.

I asked her if she wanted to get out of there and she said yes, I remember asking her if she wanted to go to her place, we couldn't go to mine as Lauren had insisted she stayed there and wait for me to come home so we could cuddle together. _Pahahaha. I, Edward Masen did NOT cuddle!_

She told me her name was Bella, a gorgeous name for a gorgeous girl, How fitting.

She told me we couldn't go back to her place as her room mates were nosey bitches. _A_ _hotel it was then_. I told the driver to take us to the nearest one and threw a bunch of 20's at him as we left. I paid for the room and we practically ran to the elevator. I could not keep my hands off her in there, I groped her kissed her and sucked on her neck.

No doubt the security guys were having a field day at this on the camera's so I looked up, smiled and flashed them the bird.

_That's right fuckers, the babe is with me!_

We got to the room and had some seriously fuck hot sex, it was possibly some of the best I had ever gotten, and I had had a lot in my time.

The moans she made as I pounded into her made me wanna stay inside her forever.

She was incredible and I'm pretty sure I told her she was fucking stunning.

I came in to the condom as she straddled me, I had made her cum a few times and she was panting like she had just ran a marathon. _My work here was done._

She lay on the bed and nestled into the crook of my arm, she told me she didn't do this often and I told her I didn't either. It was true I hadn't had sex with anyone for a while including my girlfriend. She was always too fucking busy, or was too tired. _Did she not realise I had needs?_ Shit! I know she was a lousy lay but shit I needed to get my rocks off occasionally.

The brown haired beauty rested her head on my chest and I ran my fingers down her back thinking about what had just happened. I knew I should have felt guilty but I just couldn't.

She was gorgeous and seriously fantastic in bed and whats more, she didn't realise it. I hated girls that were stunning but that knew it, they were up themselves and incredibly vain.

But she didn't seem to be like that at all, and I found that incredibly attractive.

She fell asleep on me and I kissed her head, Just then my phone started ringing so I pulled my arm from underneath Bella and she rolled over mumbling something about a guy named Jake. She had a boyfriend too? It really fucking annoyed me that she might have been taken even though I was too. I had no right to feel jealous, we had only just met!

I reached my phone out of my pants pocket and noticed I had like 7 missed calls from Lauren. I had only heard my phone once so she must have called while I was in the club or while I was fucking Bella.

I knew I had to leave, I had work in the morning and Lauren wouldn't stop calling until I answered. She was a persistent pain in the ass!

I left Bella a note with my number on it, secrtly praying she would call me although I doubted she would, and what the fuck would I do if she did? I was taken - kinda and I think she was too.

I got dressed and creeped round to her side of the bed where Bella was sleeping soundly. She was stunning even asleep. I kissed her on the forehead and left the room.

It was now 5am, I knew Lauren would go mad but I would just tell her I called into McCarty at work and kept him company. I rang McCarty and told him what had happened and he was more than happy to back me up if she asked where I was. Not that I even cared if she found out I had slept with someone, she was bound to dump my ass then?

I just didn't wanna piss off her kick boxing champion brother. I worked out every day at work in the Gym room but shit he could beat the ever loving shit out of me. I would rather not have my face rearranged, I had been told it was kinda pretty.

I made it home and told Lauren where I had been. I jumped in the shower and then when I knew she was sleeping went to the living room to watch some tv.I had to be in work in a few hours so there was no point in me going to sleep.

The next few days all I could do was think about Bella and how she felt underneath me, I closed my eyes and all I could see was her face as she came. I was fucked.

Wednesday was a complete disaster, we responded to an emergency call in a disused housing block. Some little bastards had set fire to it and there were squatters inside. Whitlock and myself were assigned to the second floor, Lieu had told us that the floor was likely to be unstable and to watch ourselves. Piece of cake,this was routine we did this kinda shit every day.

Not to be a cocky bastard or anything but I was damn good at my job, I was the most senior firefighter in our company except for the lieu, I had been in the job now for 6 years and loved every second of it. I had never been injured, well except for the odd scrape and that and I didn't intent on ruining that.

Whitlock found someone in the stairwell on the second floor and dragged him out to safety and I carried on down the hall calling for people, I heard a huge rumble and fell through the fucking floor, I landed awkwardly and cried out. I had landed on my ankle, I heard it crack and by the way it was laying I knew it was broken.

''FUCK'' I shouted at the top of my lungs. I grabbed my radio.

''Cap, you there?''

''Masen where are you? Get outta there the buildings unstable'' I heard him shout back.

''Sorry Cap no can do, I've fallen through the floor and bust my foot''

''Shit'' he replied ''Where are you? I'll send McCarty in for you''

''I'm on the south side of the building, I was on the second floor, I can't see how many floors I fell through.''

The smoke was starting to get thick, the fire was on the other side of the building but it didn't take long for the smoke to filter through and as the building was so run down I wasn't surprised it had given way.

''Stay with me son, I'll have help to you in a minute'' The captain replied.

All I could think about was being stuck off work for the next few months, I was mortified. My job was my life. What the fuck was I gonna do while I waited for this bastard thing to heal?

I head McCartys booming voice through the door to my left about 5 minutes later. As big as he was he moved pretty fast in a fire.

''Comin' through Buddy'' He shouted through his face mask, he booted the door through and headed towards me.

''Boy am I glad to see you, get me the fuck outta here'' I shouted.

He helped me to my feet and put my arm around his shoulder. He helped me up the stairs and out of the building where I was met by 2 paramedics. They put my foot in a splint and told me I would need to get to the hospital.

''I'll stop by later and see how you are'' McCarty said as they shut the doors to the ambulance.

Everyone had made it out alive and relatively unscathed and the fire was out so mission accomplished.

An X ray confirmed I had broken my ankle, it was pretty fucking painful so I was doped up on some heavy pain killers, plastered up and sent home.

6 weeks I was off work, _6 bastard weeks_. I was seriously pissed off. And to boot Lauren practically moved in to 'help me'. I had crutches and a phone so I could get to the fridge for beer and I could order pizza, I so didn't need her there. She completely disregarded eveything I told her and told me it was her _duty_ as my fiance to help me. _Gah_!

McCarty was so pissed by this he had packed his shit and moved to Whitlocks until she had gone, they did not get on in the slightest, he thought she was controlling and annoying. She ate his food, drank his beer and didn't contribute at all, he found that seriously rude. Oh and she talked to him like he was a 6th grader or something.

McCarty might not be the brightest crayon in the box but he's as loyal as they come and a damn good friend.

I really didn't blame him for hating her, she was one of the most annoying people on the planet.

She kept trying to cook for me too but shit I would have rather eaten the guys food from the firehouse, all her food tasted the same. Burnt and rubbery. Not a good combination.

I spent my free time thinking about Bella and wondering why she hadn't called.

I knew I had to get rid of Lauren before she got even more hurt, I knew she was going to be devastated but she would be even more hurt to know I stayed with her when I had no feelings for her what so ever.

So that evening when she came over to make me dinner I told her I slept with someone else, I expected her to be upset, to smack me and scream at me but she sat there and she thanked me for telling her. She told me that by telling her it meant that I must love her.

_What the fuck?? _

_Shit, getting leathered by her brother would easier than this!_

I told her I thought we should break up because of my betrayel but she assured me she forgave me and she wanted us to get married.

_Oh for the love of god_. As soon as I was back on my feet this chick was so hitting the road.

How the fuck I managed to survive the 6 weeks I dont know.I was informed by the guys that the rookies had started at the station. He said they were both pretty good despite being so new, and one of them could cook! Fuck yeah, we would finally get some decent meals at work. I had said I was gonna learn to cook but I never bothered to. I never really had the time.

A week before I was due back at work I had the cast removed off my foot, it had healed really well and despite being slightly painful in the mornings it was good, so I strapped that bad boy up heavily and started jogging gently on the treadmill to try and get some of the strength back in it! I had been advised against it but I needed to be on top form before I went back to work.

On Friday afternoon I decided to call into the station and meet the rookies before I started back on Monday of next week. Maybe I could sample some of the food I had been hearing about?.

Of couse Lauren insisted on driving me, even though I was more than capable of driving myself.

I was momentarily distracted from Lauren's nasally voice when I saw some gorgeous blonde coming walking down the street. _Whooooa she had killer legs. _She hadn't even noticed that I was gawking at the girl walking away from the fire house. We pulled up to the station and I slowly started getting out. I didn't wanna hurt my foot by knocking it the wrong way.

Lauren had wanted to come in and say hi everyone, she had only met them once before and that was as she just turned up out of the blue with a container of her dog food which went straight in the bin, but as she was already running late for her job as a receptionist at a hotel she decided against it.

I got out and slammed the door, saying goodbye and left her to it.

''Masen!'' Whitlock called out to me I smiled and waved at him.

What the fuck was McCarty doing? He was swinging something.. or someone?

He turned to me and had the biggest grin on his face.

''Yo Masen your back ? How the fuck are you dude?'' He yelled. He souded like he was surprised to see me. We hadn't seen each other in a few weeks as Lauren had been at our place.

It was nice to see him too!

He moved out of the way and behind him was a brown haired girl wearing the uniform, she must be one of the new rookies. the one that can cook? _Wow how stereotypical did that sound? _

She looked completely stunned, her mouth was open and her eyes were wide.

What the fuck was this chicks problem?

I crossed the yard and shook McCarty and Whitlocks hands, fucking hell I had missed this place.

The girl just stood there, I was about to introduce myself when Lauren jumped out of the car that had yet to leave.

''Baby'' She called ''You forgot to give me a kiss''

I grimaced and the boys noticed, they stifled a laugh and I turned to face her. She grabbed me by my cheeks and kissed me, It wasn't romantic or nice at all, it was like kissing your horrible whiskery old aunt at a wedding or something.

I smiled a small tight smile at her and she skipped off back to her car and drove off.

She had obviously seen the new girl and was marking her territory.

_Make the most of it nut job, I wont be yours for much longer!_

I turned back to the guys who had burst out laughing at me, the girl was still standing there looking at the floor, she looked really uncomfortable.

She was kinda boyish, her hair was tied back and from here it looked like she had no make up on. She was kinda plain actually. At least the guys weren't being distracted by a stunner.

''Oh dude'' McCarty suddenly said. ''This is our new probie Swan''.

I walked towards her and she looked up at me, she seemed really nervous and I had no idea why. I smiled my incredible smile at her, I've been told its capable of melting knickers... Yeah baby Im _that _good!

It suddenly hit me like a tonne of bricks, no wonder she looked so fucking nervous,the nervous girl that looked like a boy standing in front of me was Bella.... Bella from the fucking club, Bella the girl I fucked, Bella the girl I had been fantasizing about while I was laid up at home.

_What the fucking hell was she doing here????_

**So, what do we think of Edward? Totally different from the Edward we met a few chappies ago eh?**

**Let me know what you guys think xxxxxx **


	5. Chapter 5

**Hola everyone. Thank you so much for all your reviews from last chapter. Edward is a bit of a knob head eh? He's completely different to when Bella last met him. I totally loved all your response's about him, he's a cocky arrogant bastard. But do we all still love him?? I know I do!**

**Anyhoo, Thank you to my awesome Beta Magenta, you my love are incredible.**

**I don't own Twilight.**

**Chapter 5: The reunion.**

_Jesus fucking Christ._

In all the occupations in all the world he had to be a fucking fireman. And in all the fire houses in the entire of Seattle he has to work at the same one as me. How did I manage to get so unlucky?

Sincle sleeping with Edward I had imagined meeting him again and how it would be. Would we end up having steamy dirty sex again? Would it be awkward? Would he be pleased to see me?

I had not however expected to bump into him again at my place of work and then find out he works here too _AND _that he has a girlfriend.

I was needless to say pretty fucking horrified.

We were very awkwardly introduced, I pretended that I didn't know him and made my escape up to the 3rd floor of the fire house and onto the small roof from a fire exit door.

I was hyperventilating, I was dizzy, I needed to sit down before I fell down. This was so completely horrendous.

Edward looked just as mortified to see me, and maybe a little bit angry too? Why the hell he would be angry I don't know, I had done nothing to him. I hadn't given away the fact that we had met before.

What the fuck was I meant to say to him? _Oh this was not good!_

I had gone from being in an awesome mood to a foul one in the space of 10 minutes. I leaned against the back wall and reached into my slacks and pulled out my phone dialing Alice's number.

''Hellooooo?'' She sang down the phone.

''SOS Al, I need your help'' I wailed.

''Bella? Whats wrong?'' She sounded kinda anxious.

''Its all wrong Alice, so completely wrong'' I bellowed down the phone.

''Slow down and explain Bella please, your worrying me.''

''Remember Mr sexy pants from the club?'' I asked her.

''My mr sexy pants or yours?'' She replied sounding confused. Some times she could act so dull.

''_MINE_ Alice'' Why would I be on about hers? I could almost hear the cogs in her head turning.

''Right well no, I didn't see him but yes I know who you mean.'' She said.

''He's here, he works with me''

I heard her gasp.

''Nooooooooooooo'' She said.

''Yes, and I'm horrified. How am I meant to work with him here? He didn't exactly seem pleased to see me''

''Wait, you've been there a while now right? Why have you only just met him? Did he transfer in?'' She asked me.

''No, he was on sick leave as he fell through a floor and injured his leg, he's only just been declared fit to work again. Alice what am I going to do?'' I wailed again. I was gonna have to transfer, or quit or something equally as drastic. I was on the verge of tears I was that worked up.

''Just stay calm, you need to show him you're not affected by him''

''Hah, easier said than done Al, you didn't see him. He's the epitomy of gorgeous''

''You just have to. How were you meant to know where he worked?''

I put my head in my hands and slumped down the wall.

''This is a disaster''

''No, its not Bells, you just need to think positivly about this and who knows you might get laid again'' At this she started laughing.

''Alice, this is not funny and that's not gonna happen. His girlfriend brought him to work. I'm staying well away from him now I know he's got a woman''

''That blows. Listen Bells, I gotta go. Call me later?''

''Sure, thanks for listening''

''Chin up babe''.

I hung up and thought about what had just happened. How could this happen to me? I was so unlucky. This was karma for blowing up Jakes car. I knew it was, I was foolish to think I would get away with that.

I looked up to the sky and shouted.

''Ok, you've proved your point''.

I wasn't even religious so why I was shouting at the clouds was beyond me.

''Who'se proved what point?" Came a voice from the doorway. My head snapped towards the direction of the voice and I'm pretty sure my mouth was hanging open like a trap door.

Whitlock was standing there leaning against the door frame, with his arm above his head smirking at me.

''Oh never mind'' I blushed. I didn't realise anyone had witnessed my insane out burst and I had no idea how long he had been standing there. How much had he heard?

''So, I just came from Lieu's office. What do you think about riding with us today?''

''Oh my god are you for real?'' That had somewhat improved my mood, I jumped up and brushed myself down.

''So, you know Masen huh?'' I looked up at him in shock.

''W...What?'' I stammered out blinking at 7000 miles an hour.

''Oh come on, I might talk slow but I aint stupid, I saw the shock on both of your faces when you saw each other''

''Um... I er.. Whitlock I don't really wanna talk about it'' I said quietly.

''Ok Swan but I'm here if you change your mind and wanna talk ok?''

''Thanks'' I said as he walked off.

I headed back downstairs praying that Ed.. Masen had gone. He wasn't due back into work until Monday so to occupy myself I started making Lasagne while the guys watched a football game. Masen was still here I had heard the guys talking and his stuff was still cluttering up the table, I think he was in with Lieu. I was on edge which wasn't like me at all but I busied myself in dinner.I would have to remember not to make the mistake of calling him Edward in front of anyone as so far I had only been introduced to him as Masen.

A few hours later dinner was almost ready, I had no idea if Masen was even staying for food but I made extra anyway. I wasn't about to find him and ask, I was embarrassed enough as it was.

Embry came in and stuck his finger in the food that I had yet to plate up earning him a slap with the wooden spoon.

''What do you think of Masen? Have you met him yet?'' He asked me.

''I... er, I only met him briefly'' I lied. ''I dunno, he seems ok''

''He's awesome, he has an amazing reputation'' He said. Wow it looked like Masen had a fan.

''I heard'' I replied. I didn't really care about his fire fighting abilities right now, all I kept thinking about was how amazing he was in bed._ How wrong is that? _

The boys smelled the food and started piling in as I was serving it up. I placed the huge tray of lasagna down and let them help themselves. I had made garlic bread and prepared a salad too.

Masen appeared and sat down, I tried as hard as I could to not look at him but It was really difficult with him sitting a few feet away from me. A few times I did glance up at him and caught him staring back with cold hard eyes. This was not the same Edward I had met all those weeks ago in the club. This person was cold and obviously didn't like the fact that while he was away so much had changed.

''Hey, I told you Swan could cook'' McCarty said to Masen while eating a mouthful of lasagna.

"So it would seem" Came his reply.

''She sure can, this is great'' Whitlock replied.I just smiled and kept my head down. I was just pushing the food around my plate too nervous to really eat anything.

Masen didn't say anything else which made me even more nervous, no guy had ever had this affect on me before. Not even Jake. I couldn't even think with him around me, It was like being drunk and not being able to see things clearly. Him being here was seriously bad.

Just as we were finishing up a call came through, a fire at an apartment complex. I told the guys I would stay and clean up and sweep where the trucks had been.

As much as I really wanted to go on the call with them I knew my head wasn't in the right place so Embry took my place and I started collecting the dishes. In all the commotion I hadn't realised that Masen was still somewhere in the building.

I rinsed off all the plates and washed them up, the only thing this place lacked was a dishwasher, it would have made life so much easier that was for sure. These guys ate so much all the time it would certainly be of benefit if we thought about getting one. I would have to talk to Lieu about it.

I was rambling crap in my head to take my mind off the one person that I really wanted to think about. I still couldn't believe he was here, I never in my wildest dreams expected to meet him again, and certainly not in this situation.

I sighed out loud and slammed one of the drawers shut in frustration.

I finished off the cleaning and turned around to wipe the table and saw Edward standing in the doorway watching me. He looked like he was deep in thought.

I didn't know what to do or say so I just carried on with what I was doing.

''What are you doing here?'' He asked me, his voice laced with disdain. I flinched at the harshness.

I was kinda pissed that he was talking to me like I had just invaded his personal space.

''I work here'' I snapped back at him.

"I can see that" he said calmly.

"So, why ask then?"

''How did you know I was here?'' He asked me accusingly.

''What? I had no idea you were here. I didn't even know you were a fire-fighter'' I said in defence.

''Have you been following me?'' He asked.

''Do you have a hearing problem? I said, I didn't know you worked here.'' I snapped back at him. As if I would follow him, who the fuck did he think he was?

He folded his arms and stepped closer to me. I backed into the counter as he approached.

He looked me up and down, his fore finger and thumb rubbing along his chin. He stepped closer causing my breathing to increase significantly.

''If your looking for a repeat performance you're gonna be disappointed'' He said smugly.

''You arrogant bastard'' I snarled, standing up straight and pushing past him.

He thought I had followed him and was working here to try and get back in his pants? Not on his grabbed my arm and pulled me closer to him, I was inches from his face, I could feel his breathe on my face. His smell made my mouth water.

''You enjoyed it the first time'' He whispered. _Oh. my. God. _Cue the panty explosion.

''That was before I realised how much of a self centred prick you were. Don't flatter yourself Masen'' I snatched my arm back off him and gave him the meanest look I could muster, which obviously wasn't that mean as he didn't even flinch, in fact he chuckled at me.

I stormed off leaving him in the kitchen and went downstairs to sweep up. I heard him still chuckling to himself as I left the room.

Who the hell did this moron think he was?

He certainly thought a lot of himself if he thought I was only here to be chasing him. I was not _that_ desperate.

Certifiably insane maybe but I was not desperate.

I cleaned up in a rage. The boys came home an hour or so later covered from head to toe in soot. Masen said his goodbye's and left the building.

I didn't look up as his left, I didn't even acknowledge his presence. If he wanted to play funny fuckers then game on. How dare he accuse me of practically stalking him, He wasn't that special.

It wasn't until he left that I was finally able to calm down. I was shaking from being angry and in shock to see him.

The rest of the shift dragged, there was another call out to a house fire later than night and for the first time I accompanied the guys.

It was such a rush, I grabbed my gear and we got ready in the back of the truck. I was told I was not going to be entering the building, I was working on the hose with Jones. To me it didn't matter, I was finally going to be an active member of the team. Jones looked at me and smiled.

''You ready Swan?'' He called over the sirens.

''You bet'' I smiled back.

I was so totally more than ready.

Whitlock, McCarty, and Martin entered the building as we were told there was a child sleeping on the second floor. The mother was frantic so Lieu asked me to try and calm her down as she was trying to rush back into the building to rescue her child. I assured her we had the best guys in there and they would do everything in their power to bring her son out alive.

The paramedics soon arrived and examined her as she had some smoke inhalation.

I heard McCarty on the radio, the house was unstable and coming down. Lieu told them to get the hell out of there and a few minutes later they all appeared with Martin carrying the injured boy.

He had suffered burns to his arm and legs but other than that he seemed ok. I breathed a sigh of relief, the boys had done an excellent job. It was amazing.

The little lad was whisked off to hospital and we had heard later from paramedics that despite the burns he was doing really well. It took us a while to get the fire under control but once it was out we headed back to the fire house covered in soot.

I sat in the back smiling all the way home.

''What?'' McCarty had asked me.

''That was incredible'' I said back.

They laughed at me and told me Embry had said the same thing.

Seeing them rescue that boy had been exactly what I had expected to happen, it was perfectly orchestrated and carried out, the guys worked in sync with each other. They completely had each others backs, they relied and trusted each other so much. I was filled with pride to be a part of that.

Being involved in putting out a potentially life threatening fire was totally the reason I wanted to become a fire fighter in the first place, it was such an incredible feeling. Knowing I had been involved... somewhat indirectly in saving a child's life made me glow with excitement.

We got back to the fire house, showered and changed and I vegged in front of the tv. I was shattered. I had only been to one call out and felt like this, how the hell I was going to cope with 5 or more call out's a night was beyond me.

Whitlock came into the room and offered me a can of soda which I gladly accepted. I would need the caffeine boost to get me through the rest of the shift.

''So, you ok now?'' He asked looking at me curiously.

''I'm great thanks'' I replied. It was honestly the truth too. I was deliriously happy despite my earlier encounter with Masen.

''Are you gonna tell me how you know Masen?'' He asked.

''Nope'' I replied sipping from my soda can.

''But you _do_ know him'' He pressed. I noticed it wasn't a question, more of a statement.

''Kinda'' I nodded.

''He'll tell me you know. He tells us pretty much everything. You know he lives with McCarty right?''

I spluttered sending cola shooting out of my nose. _Attractive huh?_

"No, I didn't know that."

They talk about _everything_? What did that mean? Did they already know about our little encounter?

''Ahh, so there is something to tell?'' Whitlock smirked at me.

''Yes there is, and no I'm not telling it'' I huffed while wiping my mouth and shirt. I was wide awake now, shit.

He smiled at me again, ruffled my hair and left the room.

I felt bad for being so mean and snappy with him, he was only being inquisitive. But what had happened with me and Masen before I even got here was none of anyone's business and I hoped to keep it that last thing I wanted in my new job was to have a reputation for being a slag, someone who will give it up to anyone. I wasn't like that and I didn't want Masen letting people think that I was.

Chances are they already knew about me, even if they didn't know it was _me _they were talking about. _Hell that makes no sense even to me._

How did my perfect job become so damn complicated?

And to make matters worse all I could think about was Masen and his fuck- hot -hair with his head between my legs. I rolled my eyes and let my head fall against the back of the chair. I needed to snap out of this, I was gonna have to work with the guy, I needed to get my shit together and start acting professionally.

The next few hours passed relativly drama free, McCarty and Santiago were arm wrestling until one of them broke the coffee table with thier big assed arms, Lieu was not gonna be impressed when he saw the state it was in. The table was now broken in 4 pieces which they were now fighting with McCarty was screaming 'Luke, I am your father' to Whitlock who was retaliating with his own piece of light sabre coffee table. It made me giggle though to seen grown men acting so childishly. They soon got bored and played the wii, read the newspaper and then we got our heads down for a few hours. Our shift was over at 7am the following morning and then had 2 days off and I had every intention of doing nothing at all. I had hoped the girls would be home so we could chill out and spend some time together, even if it was vegging in front of the sofa watching a cheesy movie,eating nasty popcorn with a mud pack on my face.

Right now that actually sounded like heaven.

I woke at 4.45am and wandered aimlessly around the building for a while. I cleaned the dishes and got my things together for the next few days off. We didn't appreciate it when we came on shift to find dirty dishes in the sink so I didn't do the same. God I was looking forward to just doing nothing. I was completely worn out.

At about 6.30 the guys started filtering downstairs so I put on some breakfast for them, and soon enough the next shift were trudging up the stairs ready to take our place.

I said goodbye to the guys, grabbed my bag and climbed sleepily down the stairs, I wanted to sleep for a week.

I got into the cab of my truck and drove home slowly as I was still seriously tired and didn't wanna cause an accident. I could not get Masen and the fact that we had met again out of my head, not to mention the fact that we apparantly now worked together. I didn't know whether to be excited or really pissed that fate had done this to me.

I got into my bed at almost 7am and fell asleep and dreamed about that beautiful arrogant bastard Edward Masen.

**So, what did you guys think? I'm really sorry its taking so long between updates, I have sooo much on at the moment. RL is a bitch, I think I need a holiday somewhere..alone...... maybe a deserted island with nothing but my laptop and Robert Pattinson?? Ahh screw that, I wouldn't get any writing done then either!!**

**I've decided that cos the chapters are so much shorter than my last story that I'll try and post every 4 days or so, that's the plan ..... whether it happens or not I don't know.**

**The next chap is with my beta now, its kinda just a filler but things are getting exciting!!! **

**Hope to see you soon, Let me know what you think :D **

**Sae xxx **


	6. Chapter 6

**Hey girlies, so this took a little longer to update cos I've just started a counselling and psychotherapy course with the Open University towards my Criminology degree and holy crap its intense. Its hard work but its a brilliant read! So anyway cos of that I kinda slacked on this so I do apologise!!**

**To answer some questions, there will be another EPOV in a few chapters, I know a few of you didn't really like him the last time, he IS a complete nut sack but who knows people can change right! ****I'm gonna update the next chapter this weekend as well cos I feel bad about slacking.**

**Thank you again to my awesome beta Magenta Masen, If you haven't checked out her story Angel Of War get over there and do so , its amazing!! Its set during WW2 and Edward is a soldier! its HOT HOT HOT!! Here's the link. http://www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/s/5827929/1/Angel_of_war**

**Ok onto the chappie, Hope you like it. In my opinion its kind of a filler but its needed for the next chapter so off we go!!**

**Chapter 6: I love my job.**

My two days off were fantastic, blissful in fact. They were seriously well needed too. I spent saturday in my pyjamas and got pampered by Alice and Rose. We ordered in Chinese food and watched some pretty terrible movies but it was just so relaxing I didn't really mind. I even let them give me a massage and manicure, after the last few weeks I had encountered I was not about to turn down some relaxation that was for sure.

I told Rose about Masen who squealed with delight at the prospect of me ''getting it on with a hot fireman''. I tried to tell her it wasn't gonna happen again, mainly because we worked together now and it would not end well and there was the small fact that he was seeing someone but she just shrugged and told me " What will be, will be". Whatever, its not happening.

Had I known he had a woman in the first place I would never have gone near Masen no matter how gorgeous and tempting he was. That's what I keep telling myself anyway but seriously unless he told me how the hell would I know he wasn't single? He didn't exactly have a neon light hanging around his neck flashing "Taken".

I had been the victim in a cheating relationship before so there was no way I was about to put someone else through that, even if her boyfriend was the best shag of my life and she did look like a mouse.

Rose spent the day gushing about McCarty and begged me to give her his number, when I refused and told her "get it yourself" she practically wrestled me to the floor to get my phone off me.

She had it bad and she had only met the dude once. Once she got a load of him burping the alphabet and scratching his balls she wouldn't touch him with a barge pole. I sniggered at that thought. He didn't care who saw him being a pig, that was just him. He even picked his nose and showed me the contents a few days ago, he was convinced he could see Jesus in his snot. I just gagged a little big in my mouth and walked away. Yep, Rose is gonna _love_ getting to know that!

I went to bed that night after the most relaxing lavendar bubble bath and slept like a baby all night.

On Sunday Rose woke me early and insisted that we were heading out to Loyal Heights where ever the hell that was. She didn't really give much away, neither me nor Alice knew why the hell we were heading all the way out there on a Sunday morning when I should have been in bed.

I did protest and tell her I wasn't getting out of my pjs all day but she stood in my doorway with her hands on her hips giving me her bitch brow and told me if I wasn't dressed in 20 minutes we were leaving whether I was dressed or not. As much as I loved my pjs and my fluffy slippers I decided it was probably wise to get dressed and we headed there in Rose's nifty little Audi S5 Cabriolet. It was black and seriously sexy. Another thing to thank Grandpa Swan for. She bought this little baby at the same time she had signed the lease for the apartment, new house, new car and all that. As much as I was jealous I really did love my beat up old truck there was no way in hell I was trading her in for anything. Until she took her last dying breathe my truck was staying with me! Yes, I know I'm a sentimental sap but I do really love it.

Rose LOVED cars, she gushed that it could do up to 155MPH, not that she had ever tested that out but she had informed me of it anyway. Apparantly the car was a _mere_ $55k. I almost choked when she told me but she was completely in love with it so what the hell, and it was her inheritance to waste.

I'm sure dear old Gramps would be spinning in his grave to see her waste his life long savings so frivolously but he knew what she was like and he still left us all that money so really it was his own fault. This was Rose's logic not mine. I was a bit more sensible with mine, sure I had pitched in for the apartment and contributed towards the rent but we had to live, I wasn't spending the money _just_ because I had it. As much as it pained me to see all that money in the bank and not use it I had to think logically and think of my future! I could be injured at work and not be in a position to pay the rent, this money was there in case I really needed it. _See, I do think sometimes!_

I noticed that on the way to Loyal Heights Rose was kinda dressed up too, she had on a red vest top with a black shrug thing over the top, seriously tight black pants that looked like they had been painted on and red high heels. I had just thrown on a pair of 3 quarter length shorts, my dc trainers and a hoodie with my hair up, I had no intention of getting dressed up for anyone, I bet this was about a guy. Knowing Rose, it was most definitely about a guy. Poor McCarty would be upset!

Alice had no idea why we were off up there either but she always looked nice whether she was going shopping, partying or just to take the trash out so her attire didn't bother me. I knew Rose though, she was sneaky. I knew she was up to something but the stubborn bitch wouldn't give anything away.

Thankfully though I had my skateboard in the boot of her car, I hadn't done it in a long time but if she bored me with whatever game she was playing I could disappear and do my own thing for a while.

Chances are I would go into work tomorrow with a few broken bones but at least I would have had fun.

We pulled into the park at about 11.30am and Rose checked her lipstick, she had ignored all our previous questions about why we were even coming out here by blasting Ke$ha's 'Tik Tok' full blast. I liked jamming to this song as much as the next crazy person but did it really have to be so loud?

I grabbed my board and we made our way through the park, about 10 minutes later I realised what the fuck was going on.

I stopped dead in my tracks and threw my head back looking at the sky.

"Jesus Rose, what the hell are you doing?" I yelled at her.

She turned and looked at me batting her eyelashes, feigning innocence. That shit might work on idiot guys but it did not work on me.

"What?" She asked sweetly.

" Cut the bullshit, You know damn well _what_ Rose" I sighed exasperated. Alice just stood there taking in the view, and despite not wanting to I was enjoying it too. _Son of a bitch. _

"I was invited" She said with her hands on her hips defiantly.

"Shit Rose. I _wasn't_ invited which means they didn't want me here" I pinched my nose with my fingers. They hadn't seen me yet so I could still clear off and catch up with the girls later on. This was a mess.

"Swan" McCarty bellowed. I rolled my head so my chin touched my chest. _Fuck._

The whole of the company were out here playing football, even that delicious specimen Masen and I knew nothing about it which in my mind meant that I was not meant to be here.

I smiled.. sorta, as McCarty ran towards me and patted me on the back.

"Thanks for coming" He gushed. I rolled my eyes.

"Whatever, I only just found out you were all out here, Rose failed to mention that to me when we were on our way over" I tried to hide my annoyance at the lack of invite but I obviously wasn't doing a very good job.

"What? Didn't Masen tell you Friday? It was his idea, I thought you knew"

Oh well that just explains everything, if he was supposed to tell me and didn't meant to me that he had deliberately failed to tell me!! Bastard!

"No, he didn't" I said bitterly. Had McCarty not told Rose to come out I might never have known, and obviously that was the plan. _That spiteful shit head._

"Come on Swan, I'll talk to him. Now get your butt out there we need you" He smiled his dimpled smile at me but I was actually kinda upset that Masen deliberately failed to invite me to this. I might have said no but thats not the point. Even Embry was here, up Masens ass... as usual.

I looked over at him and he was standing with his hands on his hips looking over at us. He had on a pair of 3 quarter length shorts and a sleeveless shirt showing off those gorgeous arms I remembered so well. How did _that_ man, the guy that gave me the most incredible nigt of my life become.... _this_ idiot?

I walked over to Alice who looked like a kid in a candy shop, she was mesmerised by everything. I chuckled at her.

"You work with all of these guys?" She asked sounding completely amazed.

"Er yeah, I'll introduce you to them later ok?"

She looked at me and squealed and then hugged me.

"Thank you" She gushed.

Anyone would think I was introducing her to royalty not the members of firehouse 8.

"So, which one is he?" She asked while eyeing me suspiciously.

"Which one is who?" I replied scratching the side of my head, not looking her in the eye.

"You know who I mean Bella. Mr sexy pants"

Oh for the love of god she better not mention that where he can hear it, or I will never live it down.

"He's the one over in the black sleeveless top,bronzyish coloured hair, he's standing with Whitlock"

"Oh my gosh hes gorgeous" She said again sounding shocked. My taste in men wasn't _that_ bad.

"He is huh, and he's incredible in bed" I snort laughed.

"No, not him, the guy standing next to him" she prattled.

"_Whitlock?"_ I almost shouted.

"Bella, hes beautiful" Alright, I had never thought of Whitlock like that before but he wasn't _bad_ looking. He had a little somethin' somethin' that was for sure, and apparantly our resident heart throbs had caused quite a stir with Alice and Rose.

Speaking of her, I turned to look for her and she was deep in conversation with McCarty who was smiling and twirling his fingers in my sisters hair. _Oh yuk. _She was leaning against a tree he was pressed up against her with one hand in her hair and one above her head leaning on the bark. I just shook my head.

I looked up at Whitlock and Masen who were heading towards us. I just rolled my eyes again and muttered "fuck" to myself. I did not want to be dealing with this shit today, all I had wanted to do was stay in my nice warm comfy bed in my pjs and eat junk food and now I was here making a complete fool of myself in front of my work mates that didn't want my company when out of work. To say I felt stupid would be an understatement.

"Hey Swan" Whitlock said as they approached us.

"Hey" I replied.

"You came? Cool. Who is _this_ lovely lady?" He asked while looking at Alice.

"This is my best friend Alice, Alice this is Whitlock and Masen"

"Call me Jasper" Whitlock drawled. I couldn't help but raise my eyebrows and shake my head slightly as he picked up her hand and kissed it. What the fuck was with all the chivalry? They didn't act like this around me at work. They were just yukky men there.

I looked up at Masen who was smiling down at me.

"Hey Swan" He said sexily. Yeah, 'even try it buddy I thought. I won't fall for your sexiness again!

"Hi" I replied dryly. Even though I wanted to suck his ear lobes right now I was kinda annoyed at him.

"I'm glad you got my note" He said in the same husky voice. What???

"What note?" I answered dumbly.

"The one I left on your locker door telling you about today, I didn't get a chance to tell you in person, I was too kinda shocked you know"

Ok now I felt like a first class knob. I didn't even go in my locker before I left work, well I did but it was like 4.30 in the morning so the lights were off. _Shit._

"Er no, I didn't sorry" I stuttered out.

I looked over at Alice and Jasper who were having thier own little conversation.

"I really don't want this to be wierd between us. Ok?" I said pleadingly. It was the truth, things were hard enough in our occupation without adding sexual tension to the equation too.

"Sure" He replied, his expression was kinda blank so I didn't really know what the hell he was thinking. It was true, we had to work together now. We needed each others backs, we couldn't let one night get in the way of our working relationship.

"Come on guys, are we playing or what?" Jones shouted interrupting my thinking. I just looked down as Masen headed off back over to the rest of the guys.

"You're playing right?" Whitlock asked me.

" Well no, but what the hell" I replied. I took off my hoodie and realised I was only in a vest top.

I was always a tomboy growing up but shit I was hopeless at football. I got floored more times than I had the ball. Alice and Rose were on the sidelines cheering us on like a pair of airhead cheer leaders. I was on Whitlock, McCarty and Jones's team and on the other side there was Embry, Masen, Santiago and Martin's team. It wasn't much of a game but we were able to have a knock around so it was good.

Masen tackled me to the floor a few times when I didn't even have the ball gaining him a death glare from me. He would just smirk his annoying ass smirk at me and carry me on. I knew what he was doing... he was trying to throw me off my game. Not that I had much game but still, I was onto him.

Embry even tried to tackle me but ended up picking me up by my waist and running with me down the field. In the end after losing _badly_ to Masen's team McCarty gave up and headed over to where Rose was. I had actually had a lot of fun so far. I couldn't help looking over at Masen though and watching how his muscles moved, I would see his arms tense and get flashbacks from that night that even though I wanted to forget I so could not.

Everything reminded me of it, even when he tackled me to the floor, all I could remember was him between my legs and immediatly started blushing. He knew what I was thinking, the smirk on his face as I went bright red gave that away. He had a cheeky glint in his eye that I couldn't help but be mesmerised by.

I could stare into them all day, his gaze was so intense.

Eventually at about 3 we called it a day. I needed to get my uniform ready for tomorrow and we were meant to be catching a movie and getting chinese food. I was absolytely horrified when I found out Rose had invited Whitlock and McCarty. She also invited Masen but he had other plans, probably with his girlfriend. I had no intention of being 5th wheel so I let them go on thier little double date. I had a date of my own, with a carton on Ben and Jerry's and Wednesday night's episode of Lost.

I was still slightly peeved about the fact that I hadn't _actually_ been invited, yeah I know I was left a note but I knew he had done that shit on purpose probably hoping I wouldn't see it and miss the game. I knew we had to remain professional and not let the guys know that we had met before but him pulling stupid stunts like this was not the way to go about it. Men can be so friggin stupid when they want to be.

Whitlock already knew something had gone on, and no doubt he would figure it out soon, it was just a matter of time before I became the butt of his and McCarty's jokes.

I headed home with the girls who jabbered excitedly about their date later that evening. I just rolled my eyes and looked out of the window. Shit like this really made me miss Jake, despite what he had done to me. I knew I could never forgive him for cheating on me, especially with someone who meant nothing to him, as he told me in numerous voice mails and texts. Why the hell would he risk our relationship for someone that meant so little to him? It baffled me. I knew seeing Alice and Rose with Whitlock and McCarty would hurt, it would just remind me of what I had lost.

Tears stung my eyes as I thought about Jake and the good times we had, we did despite him breaking my heart have some awesome times. I still to this day dont know what I did wrong. I know we weren't in the same College but its not like I was over the other side of the country, I lived across town. I gave him everything and I really did believe he loved me. I obviously didn't mean as much to him as I thought I did and even now all these months later that hurt. Despite me acting like I didn't care I still really did and that shit pissed me off.

I angryily swiped the tears from my eyes, I was still bitter about the way I was treated and despite still having feelings for Jake I was not prepared to act on them. He had made a fool of me once, I was not about to let that happen again no matter now much I missed the old days. Whats that old saving? ''Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me''. I was no fool, and I swore I would never be treated like that again.

We got home and the girls went to get ready while I changed into my pjs and fluffy slippers again. If I could wear these babies to work I soooo would, they were the comfiest things on the planet.

3 episodes into my Scrubs marathon Alice and Rose tottered out of their bedrooms looking like they were about to walk the red carpet at a movie premier not go to our local theatre. They looked fantastic, Rose had on a tight red dress with a black belt and Black heels, her hair was down and all curly. She had legs that went on forever. Alice had on a pair of skinny jeans , black high heels and a bright blue sweater top thing. Personally I would never wear anything they were wearing but they made it work. They said goodnight, kissed me on the cheek and off they went.

I must have dozed off as the next thing I know my alarm on my phone is blaring down my ears. I woke up groggily and slapped the buttons until the incessant noise finally stopped. I sat up and rubbed my eyes and realised I was still on the sofa, a blanket had been thrown over me. I checked my phone through squinted eyes, the light on my phone hurt my head. It was 4.45am. _Ugh._

I dragged myself into the shower and got dressed, luckily everything had been put out last night so I didn't have to worry about ironing my uniform.

I made myself some toast and leaned up against the kitchen counter to eat it still half booming voice from the direction of the living room jolted me awake.

"Whats for breakfast Swan?" McCarty said.

_.Fuck?_

I choked, I swallowed my toast and inhaled at the same time causing the toast to lodge in my throat. My eyes watered as I coughed my breakfast back up.

McCarty just stood there watching me, he must have known he had scared the living shit out of me. What the hell was he doing in my living room at 5.30am??

I finally stopped spluttering and was able to talk.

"What the fuck man?" I shouted.

"Shh, you'll wake the others" He said while putting his index finger over his lips.

"Fuck that, what are you doing here? I spluttered again.

"Oh, I stayed with Rose last night" he beamed, he actually fuckin' beamed. God he was such a pansy.

"Oh, yuk. I don't wanna know. I'm going to work. Is Whitlock here too?"

"No, he went home. Nothing happened, I only came back here because Masen's needy irritating girlfriend stayed at ours last night so Rose let me crash here."

Bullshit, I knew something had happened with him and Rose I could see it all over his face. Theres no way he would smile like that for no reason.

"Whatever" I headed to my room to grab my bag.

"Hold up Swan, I'll ride with you" He said stuffing toast into his mouth.

Great, not only did he ruin my quite time before work, he was now going to ruin my driving time too.

"Sure" I muttered. He grabbed his bag that was lying by the front door, I don't even know how I missed that and we headed down to the car.

"My car" he said gruffly. "I'm not riding in that heap of shit"

"Hey, theres nothing wrong with my truck" I said defensivly. I know it was old and probably cost more to drive than it was worth but I loved it.

"Whatever, just get in" He instructed.

"Hold up, why am I driving with you when I can just drive myself and meet you there?" I replied.

"Whats the point in taking 2 cars when we are going the same way?"

OK, he had me there. I reluctantly got in and we drove to the station in silence.

Apart from McCarty tapping his index finger on the steering wheel there was no noise. It was a comfortable silence. It sure beat sitting in Rose's car listening to crap music so loud it made me ears want to bleed.

We got to the station in about 9 minutes as there was almost no traffic at this time of the morning. I thanked McCarty for the lift and stepped out of the car to be almost ploughed down by a silver Volvo pulling into the parking space a few down from where we were. I slammed the door shut and made my way towards the station. Fucking idiot wants to learn to watch where he's going before he kills someone.

I looked back and saw Masen step out, I rolled my eyes. _What a surprise._ The gorgeous idiot drives like maniac.

He ran over to me and McCarty and they said hi. I just ignored him.

"So, what you doing driving her to work?" Masen asked like I wasn't even there.

"I stayed there last night" McCarty replied nonchalantly. I almost fucking choked. _**Again. **_

"OK, just to clarify, he spent the night with my _sister_, not me and we drove to work together this morning" Masen was glaring at me, what the fuck was his problem. He was making it really easy for me to hate him.

"Yeah, her piece of shit truck probably would have broken down on the way here" McCarty chuckled.

I chose to ignore the comment about my baby and carried on into the building. I could feel Masen's presence, I knew his eyes were on me I could practically feel them burning holes in my back. I didn't get how one minute he could be so seductive and then the next he was a complete asshole. I needed to just stay the hell away from him - well as much as was possible in this job.

My first day working with Masen was alright, we were actually pretty busy and I noticed when he was working he was like a completely different person, he was so professional. The guys weren't joking when they said he was good at his job, I went on 2 call outs with them that day and he was incredible both times. One was to a car accident where a man had been involved in a 3 car pile up and had been injured. He couldn't get out the car as his legs were trapped beneath the dash board, he had to be cut from the wreckage as he had upper back pain. I loved seeing the jaws of life in action, they were awesome, so powerful.

The other people involved were ok and walking around but this guy was hit from the front and behind so he was pretty hurt and the paramedics didn't want to take any risks so they decided to cut him out in case he did infact have a spinal injury.

My job during that call out was to crawl through the back of the crushed car and keep the patient still and calm. The paramedics were working on him so I was in there talking to him and making sure he stayed conscious, he told me his name was Tom. He told me all about his kids and how his wife was expecting a baby in 2 months. I prayed for all of their sakes that he wasn't too badly injured. He made me promise to tell them all he loved him which I refused, I told him he could tell them himself when he got out of there. It broke my heart to see a grown man cry like that.

Finally he was pulled from the wreckage but was losing a lot of blood so he was rushed to hospital.

The second call out I attended was a house fire. An eldery lady had fallen asleep while smoking and set her curtains alight. It wasn't a huge fire but it was enough to do some substantial damage the back of her house. She had managed to get out unhurt, her cat however who was sleeping upstairs was not so lucky.

I was told to make sure there were no kinks in the hose and then accompanied McCarty and Masen into the house. We checked that the fire was completely out and eventually headed back to the fire house. It was a long tiring day, when we weren't on call outs Lieu had us cleaning the trucks inside and out, and then we started on the inside. The guys protested since there was a football game on but they did it anyway.

I was given the night off cooking duty and we had pizzas delivered but 10 minutes into eating we had another call out. It was Embrys turn to go with the guys so I stayed and cleaned up. Despite being a serious ass when he wanted to be Masen remained decent for the majority of the day. I would look over at him sometimes and he would be looking back at me with a curious expression on his face. I would just raise my eyebrow at him cockily and carry on with what I was doing. He was not getting to me................_ I think. _

I thought being so close to him and not being able to touch him would be hard but really it was easier than I thought as he was such a bell end when he wanted to be.

I just hoped that he realised now that I wasn't stalking him and I didn't join the fire department just because of him. If he seriously believed that then he thought very highly of himself. He might have been an incredible shag and be extremely gorgeous but there was no way I would endure all this for a guy. No way in hell!!

I loved my job, It was so rewarding. I heard from the hospital later on that night that Tom was out of surgery and was doing fine, his wife and children were with him and he was expected to make a full recovery in time for thier new baby being born. I beamed with pride knowing I had contributed in saving such a wonderful mans life. I made a mental note to call into the hospital to see him in a few days to see how he was doing.

One day a few weeks later though my entire outlook on the job changed.... for the worse.

**So, what did you all think? It was kind of a filler chapter but we get to learn a bit more about the characters!**

**Thank you all so much for all still being here. Im gonna post the next chapter in a bit xx **


	7. Chapter 7

**So, I promised two chappies and here they are!!**

**I dont know if I'm gonna be able to update next week anyway as I'm going to Tenby for my birthday next Sat and I predict a severe hangover! So just in case at least I don't fall behind on this, plus my course officially starts so I gotta knuckle down and make sure I don't fail.**

**Now I gotta say there is a bit in this story nearer to the end that's kinda disturbing, you'll see what I mean when you get there. Its probably not as bad as some of the stuff you've read but I thought I better say it anyway just in case like. **

**Anyway, Thank you as usual to my incredible Beta Magenta. You are wicked babe. **

**I don't own Twilight.. yada yada**

**Chapter 7: 54th Street.**

It had been about 3 weeks since Masen had come back to work. Nothing dramatic had happened, It was all pretty routine. I actually found myself making more of an effort in the mornings when it came to getting ready for work. I would apply mascara and eyeliner which surprised the guys. _Yes, idiots I can do female when I want to! _

I loved work and looked forward to going every day but I found that I was looking forward to it more and more lately.

I knew deep down why, I just wasn't about to admit to anyone that Masen was the reason.

I would find myself day dreaming about him between calls, and staring at him when we were on calls. The ways his muscles flexed in his back would make me tingle all over and even though I wanted my feelings to remain private I knew that Whitlock was close to finding out the truth. He would stare at me with an odd expression on his face like he was trying to figure something out. I would just play it off and ask if he was having trouble spelling a word. Then dart into the bathroom away from his intense gaze.

I had practically forced Alice not to tell him about me and Masen - obviously she knew and promised me she wouldn't say a thing. I didn't believe her in the slightest. I loved her to death but when it came to Alice and secrets I didn't trust her as far as I could throw her.

We had remained civil to each other despite him being a moody son of a bitch when he wanted to be, I swear he has PMS more than the average woman. But for some reason his mood swings enticed me, I could not get him out of my head and it was driving me insane. Everytime I looked at him I kept remembering that night. The sexual tension rolled off me in waves, I'm surprised no one noticed.

It was clear that he did not reciprocate my feelings, he not once indicated that he wanted a repeat performance of that night despite how much he seemed to enjoy it. He enjoyed seeing me blush that much was certain but other than that he barely spoke to me unless we were on a call out. It hurt me to admit he wasn't interested but I carried on pretending that it didn't affect me.

Thursday night was dead, there were only 3 call outs the entire shift so we entertained ourselves by watching tv or playing basketball behind the firehouse. I of course ended up falling twice which had the guys in hysterics. I'm glad they found my misfortunes amusing.

I dont know why I insist on playing stupid games when I have the balance of a monkey on crack. My dad used to joke around when I was younger about my lack of coordination, he would say everytime I had to go to the hospital that he was gonna wrap me up in cotton wool or stick me in my own bubble so I wouldn't hurt myself. I was constantly falling over - usually over nothing which resulted in numerous visits to the ER. I was clumsy the majority of the time but the rest of the time I was off in a world of my own somewhere just thinking and _bam_ I would fall off a curb or walk into a wall.

Then I started skateboarding much to my parents horror. I remember my mother shrieking at me in the kitchen that I had a hard enough time standing upright on flat surfices let alone moving ones. I had just laughed her off and assured her I would be fine. And most of the time I was.

When ever I fell Jake would be there no matter what to help me up and brush me down, even Mike would be there. Sure they would be laughing at me but they were there regardless.I really missed them.

I was feeling especially home sick lately. My dad was still pissed at me for joining the fire department but we were at least on talking terms again. He told me he respected my decision but he didn't have to like it. I missed him even though he was a cranky cantankerous man. He was a very hard man to please and I prayed that one day he would be proud and pleased of me. I think deep down he was still pissed that I ended things with Jake, I know his relationship with Billy had suffered since the "car" incident and I think despite everything they had expected we would get back together. As much as I loved Jake deep down I knew I would never be able to trust him again and whats the point in having a relationship with someone if you cant trust them?

Embry was starting to piss me off too, he was constantly trying to undermine me and was so far up Masens ass he couldn't even see what day it was. I heard him bitching about me to Whitlock a few weeks ago, he was saying I wasn't pulling my weight which was complete bullshit, whenever I was on a job I always gave 110%,and he had only been on one call out with me to date so I had no idea what the fuck he was yapping about, unless someone else had been bitching about me to him?

He thought cos I was a girl I was incapable of doing the things he was - therefore making him a better fire fighter. I heard Whitlock telling him to wind his neck in and back the fuck off me which made me smile. At least one guy had my back here. But it got me thinking that if he was slagging me off in a place I could hear him what was he saying behind my back? Was he doing it with everyone hoping that it would shake their confidence in me?

I had enough to prove without adding him being a dick to the equation.

I ignored Embry for the majority of the time we were around each other, he tried to talk to me but I would give him the shortest answers possible and eventually he cottoned on that I was pissed at him and called me out on it. I was in the kitchen making dinner on Thursday night when he strolled in and started a conversation about how cool it was to be "finally one of the guys". What the fuck did that even mean?

I had just ignored him and carried on cutting up the onions for the enchiladas. It was McCarty's favourite dinner and he had been begging me for a week straight to cook it so I finally gave in. Embry stood and slammed his hands on the table causing me to jump.

"What the fuck is your problem huh Swan?" He bellowed.

I stopped what I was doing and glared at him. Oh he did not want to be going there!

"_You_, You are my problem Embry" I snapped back.

He backed away from me, obviously not expecting my reaction.

"How dare you bad mouth me behind my back you little shit." I shouted slamming the knife down on the counter.

Masen, Santiago, Jones and McCarty had heard me and appeared from various places in the fire house to see what was going on.

"Wh.. What are you talking about?" Embry stuttered. I walked towards him and then unleased my fury on him.

"You know _exactly_ what the fuck I'm talking about. For a guy you really are a bitch you know that? If you've got a problem you come to _me, _you do _not_ slag me off behind my back, at least have the balls to say it to my face" I was now in front of him, he was kinda tall but his eyes were wide with fear.

"Now do you have a problem with me?" I asked him.

"N...no, who told you that?" He responded.

"I over heard you, you _idiot_. And if I hear it again I'm gonna smack your dumb ass into next week. Do you understand me?"

He didn't reply he just nodded his head furiously. His face was all red and frustrated from being shouted at and embarrassed the way he was. I was not about to be made a fool of and I'm glad everyone heard, at least then they would know not to do the same thing. I was so angry I was literally shaking. This wasn't fucking high school, we weren't teenagers. If he had a problem he should have brought it up with me instead of acting like a bitch and slagging me off.

I didn't really want a reputation for being a bitch but I didn't want people thinking I was a pushover either, I needed to put my foot down before things got out of hand and I had just shown Embry I was not gonna take shit.. from anyone, least of all him.

I stormed off upstairs to compose myself when I heard McCartys voice from the stair way.

"You decent Swan?" He called.

"Sure, come up" I replied.

He made his way over to my bunk and sat down next to me.

"You alright?" He asked me softly.

"I'm good. Sorry about that." I nodded towards the stairs so he knew I was referring to what happened downstairs.

"Are you kidding? That was the most entertainment we've had all day" He smiled at me and nudged my shoulder with his.

I chuckled along with him.

I had seen a lot of him since he started calling at the apartment to take Rose out on "dates". She told me they were just friends but I knew they were more. I would find out eventually, or hear them. Ughh.

"So, your alright? Rose will have my balls if she finds out I didn't check on you"

"I'm fine, I just need a time out, I'll be down in a second" I smiled at him, he really did have the cutest dimples. I could see why Rose would be attracted to him, despite him being incredibly gross he could also be a downright sweetheart when he wanted to be.

He headed back downstairs and I lay back on my bunk, with my hands under neath my head. I sighed loudly.

I hadn't meant to be such a bitch to Embry - Ok, so maybe I did - But I had to work with these guys, I should have pulled him to one side to tell him I was annoyed with him.

I wasn't gonna apologise for my behaviour, I just think I could have handled it a little bit better.

About 10 minutes later I headed back downstairs, the kitchen was empty apart from Masen who was stirring the chicken. I had forgotten about dinner in all the drama. Embry was no where to be seen.

"Hey" I said as I descended the stair case.

"Hey, sorry. I didn't think you would want the chicken burning" he replied.

"Thank you" I stepped next to him as he moved away to let me carry on with the dinner.

"So, you put Embry in his place huh?" Masen smirked.

I looked over to him and saw him running his right hand through his already all over the place hair. I swear my knees went weak.

"Yeah, sorry about that" I muttered as I added the onion to the diced chicken.

"He deserved it" Was all he said before he left the room leaving me to my thoughts.

I smiled knowing I wasn't the only one that thought that.

About 30 minutes later I plated up the food, I didn't know where Embry was, nor did I care but I put some in the microwave for him. I might have been nasty to him but I wasn't a downright twat.

The guys all went to bed at about 1 in the morning, our shift wasn't over until 7 but I couldn't sleep so I sat and watched 'A league of their own'. It was totally my favourite movie when I was a kid, I loved it. Even the recruitor guy and his dodgy accent, and Kit's childish behaviour.

I must have dozed off while watching it and was abruptly woken by the buzzer going off. We had a call. I sprung into action, grabbing my boots that I had taken off earlier in the evening and threw them on. I could hear footsteps upstairs, the guys were all running around.

Whitlock and Masen were the first ones down.

"Swan, your with us" Masen yelled as he flew down the stairs.

I ran to the pole and slid down it, God I loved my job.

I threw on my turn outs, grabbed my jacket and hat and jumped onto the truck, sitting next to McCarty and Embry who looked at me sheepishly, smiled and then put his head down.

We were heading to a car fire on 54th Street. We were told there were 3 vehicles involved and one had apparantly caught fire.

It only took us 3 minutes if that to reach the destination, I grabbed my hat and jumped out of the truck.

The police department were here already and the paramedics had just turned up. Why was everyone just standing around?

Masen and McCarty grabbed the hose and headed towards the car, I could hear screams, holy fuck there were people still inside the car.. _alive._

The passenger from one car was pronounced dead on our arrival and the driver was in critical condition, he was raced to the hospital. The driver from the other vehicle had a pretty bad cut on his head but was talking to the police. The body of another victim was on the floor covered in a yellow sheet. I was mortified, I had never seen such horror before.

"Masen they're still alive" I shouted to him, running towards the fire. McCarty grabbed the back of my jacket and yanked me back.

"Swan, get back" Masen shouted back to me as they battled to put the fire out.

They had to maintain a safe distance but those people were still alive, they needed to work faster to get the fire out before they died.

"But there are people _alive_" I screamed.

"Just stay the fuck back" I was told again by Masen.

"Hurry" I muttered to myself.

I could hear their screams as they were burning and there was nothing I could do about it. What was the fucking point in being a fire fighter if I couldn't help people who were in a fire? I took my hat off and tossed it inside the truck, leaning against the side of it.

Eventually the fire was put out, I couldn't hear the screams anymore, I could only hear the paramedics as they got to work. The people were pulled from the wreckage but it was too late for them. They had burned alive while we had stood there, unable to help them.

6 people died that tragic night, the driver, the only person to survive, was 3 times over the drink driving limit and had ploughed straight into the back of another car which had flipped as it was hit with such force. The other car was crushed by the one that had flipped. I was surprised that there were that many cars out here at that time of the night. Had it been during the day so so many more people would have died.

Along with 4 adults 2 children also died. A family of 4 were coming home from a week long trip in Montana and before they got a chance to get home they were wiped out by a drunken lunatic. It was such a tragic disaster.

We rode back to the house in silence, the tension was thick. We all knew if we could have helped them we would, but that didn't help the way I was feeling. People were dead and there wasn't a damn thing I could do about it. My chest was tight and I felt like I could barely breathe but I had to keep it together, at least until we got back to the house.

I sobbed uncontrollably once we got back to the fire house. I never cried, I hadn't even cried when I found out about Jake.

I couldn't even remember the last time I cried but I completely sobbed my heart out at the loss of all those people. I slid down the wall in the locker room and stayed there for a while thinking.

Could we have saved them if we got there sooner? Could this disaster be avoided?

It was the first time since working with the fire department that I had seen people die, and to say I was traumatised would be an understatement. It was a mindless tragedy, all because of one persons selfish actions. Whitlock had entered the room and seen me slumped on the floor, my knees up to my chin crying but he didn't say anything. He knew that I just needed time to deal with this in my own way. I hated feeling so useless.

Everyone was feeling it, the silence was deafening.

I headed upstairs eventually to change and Embry was sat on his bunk with his hands in his head. I felt exactly the same way.

"Hey" I said softy.

He looked up at me and I could see he had been crying, I guess it even affected him. I knew someone had died when he was on a call out a few weeks before so this wasn't his first like it was for me but the fact that all those people had died had hit us all hard, especially as there were children involved.

"I'm sorry" He croaked as I headed into the bathroom.

I just smiled slightly and nodded my head. I didn't know it then, but that would be the last time I saw Embry.

At 7am, I was glad to be going home for 2 days off. I needed to just get out of there and forget the evening ever happened, not that that was likely as I kept hearing those poor people and their screams in my head.

"Swan, you coming to Joe's tonight?" Whitlock asked me when I came down with my bag.

"What's Joe's?" I asked glumly.

"A sports bar, we're heading there tonight to get wasted, wanna come?"

"Sure, I could do with a blow out after this shift" I replied.

"Alright, I'll swing by and pick you up at 8?" Whitlock told me.

"Sure" I responded.

As I was leaving I caught Masen's eye. He looked so sad, He felt the same way I did. Like we had let those people down.

I smiled slightly and headed to my car. I spent the rest of the day in bed, I couldn't sleep though, I had too many thoughts running through my mind. And those damn screams just would not leave me alone. So eventually I just gave up on sleeping and lay on the sofa eating potatoe chips and watching really really bad Maury Povich reruns. After the 3rd "Who'se ma baby daddy?" episode I almost gave up the will to live.

Alice and Rose had gone to Forks for the weekend to visit my parents so the house was unusually quiet. I was so used to someone being here. What was with all the silence today? I was used to Rose's crappy music or Alice's terrible singing that the silence was beginning to get on my nerves.

I managed to get a few hours sleep and eventually at 6.30 I got in the shower and ready for the night.

At least with the girls not here I didn't have to worry about dressing me up in something ridiculous.I got dried while sinking my first beer of the night and threw on a pair of skinny jeans, a tightish t-shirt and my Dc's and then threw on a hoodie. I finished my second beer and third beer, shoved my money , keys and phone into my pockets and headed for the door. I was about 10 minutes early but I needed to go, standing around doing nothing was irritating me so I locked the doors and headed downstairs to wait for Whitlock.

I was already feeling slightly tipsy from the beers, I hadn't really eaten much today and a bag of potatoe chips hardly classed as nutritious so the beer went straight to my head, I didn't care though cos the screaming had finally stopped.

Eventually Whitlock pulled up with McCarty and Masen.

"Get in" Masen instructed me. He was driving and McCarty was in the passenger side. I climbed in behind was kinda sexy when he was all dominant and shit.

He had a frown on his face and his lips were pressed into a hard line but he was still pretty hot.

I got in and we drove in silence to the bar. Halestorms "Bet U wish U had me back" was playing in the background so I hummed along with it, I loved this band. But this song so reminded me of Jake.

I couldn't seem to get him out of my head either lately, I knew I didn't want to see him again or get back with him or whatever but I really missed him, I missed how we were with each other. I missed how he touched me, I really missed how he hugged me and right now I really could have used a damn hug.

I swiped angry tears away as I remembered him.

I looked up and saw Masen looking at me through the rear view mirror. I just closed my eyes and turned my head. The last thing I needed was him giving me shit about crying, especially over a guy.

We got to Joe's and I headed straight to the bar.

"4 beers and 4 Tequilas please" I told the bar tender.

"You got it" he replied.

"Tequila?" McCarty asked me.

"Damn right and if you dont drink it, I will"

They drank the tequila and 3 beers later I decided Vodka was a really good idea.

We played some pool but by this time I was pretty wasted and ended up losing very badly. Its a good job we weren't playing for money or I would be severely broke by now. I headed to the bar to prop it up.

"Hey, are you alright?" Whitlock asked me.

"I'm fine" I replied sinking yet another shot of... something.

"You dont look fine" He said. "Maybe you should slow down?"

"Maybe you should leave me the hell alone?" I snapped bitterely

"Swan... Bella? Just..... just dont let this eat you up ok. It's hard but it does get easier I promise."

He patted my arm and walked away. Angry tears spilled down my cheeks. Fuck, why did I feel so incredibly useless right now?

I was snapping at my friends and drinking my body weight in Tequila. My head was spinning, I felt nauseous. I cant even tell you what Joe's looked like. I can tell you what liqor they had and that the toilets smelled like urine and cigarette smoke but I have no idea about the rest of the place, I was on a mission to get drunk and it was working. I was wasted.

I loved my job so damn much but it wasn't enough right now. We should have been able to save those people, they were alive damnit. I staggered off to the toilet and bumped literally into Masen who was coming out of the mens. He was zipping himself up and if I wasnt wallowing in self pity I might have enjoyed the sight, as it were I was so caught up in my emotions to really pay much attention to his groin.

"Whoaa there Swan, are you alright?"

"Why the fuck is everyone asking me if I'm alright? Do I fucking _look_ alright?"

He put his hand on my shoulder and I shrugged it off, I didn't want people's pity, I just wanted to be held.

"Swan, you know you can talk to me right?"

I sighed and slumped against the wall in the dark dingy hallway.

"I don't know if I can do this" I said quietly.

"It gets easier" Masen said.

"Does it?" I looked up and saw him standing in front of me with his hands shoved into his pockets.

"Eventually" He said simply. "This just proves that you care. It doesn't make you a bad fire fighter because you care about people, but you do learn to switch off your feelings"

"It's hard" I said, letting tears slip down my cheeks again.

I knew he was right, he had been in the job long enough to know what he was talking about but that didn't help how I was feeling right now. I wanted so desperatly to be able to save those people but I knew deep down there was no sense in any of us running into a fire to pull them out and getting ourselves killed in the process. There was nothing we could do until the fire was out, logically I knew this but I couldn't help but think otherwise.

"I know" He put his hand on my shoulder again, I didn't shrug him off this time.

He told me to go freshen up and that he would see me back in there. After that I perked up a little bit, I wasn't the only person feeling like shit. So I sank a few more beers, no more Tequila though, I was already gonna have the mother of all hangovers in the morning I didn't want to make it worse so I had a few more beers and a few pints of water and eventually it was time to go home.

Whitlock had gone home earlier in the night as he had said he was gonna do over time the following morning.

We got into Masen's car, he was the only one not drinking tonight which is probably why he made so much sense earlier.

McCarty got into the back with me and I ended up lying down in the back with my head in his lap. I was seriously dizzy.

Fresh air was badddddddddddd and Vodka was _not_ my friend.

We got to my apartment complex and I felt my arm being tugged.I was pulled off McCarty's lap and pulled out of the car.

"Swan, where's your keys?" Masen asked me.

"In my pocket?" I slurred out.

I was propped up at the side of the car with Masen going through my pockets and in these jeans he was _incredibly_ close to my skin.

"Swan, they aren't here, where are they?" He said, clearly exasperated.

I stuck my hand into my pocket and grabbed what I could, sending money flying everywhere.

No keys. Not good. And come to think of it, I had no phone either, where the hell had that got to? I know I had it earlier.

"I cant find them" I said "Where's my phone?"

"I have your phone babe, you almost dropped it in my beer so I kept it safe for you"McCarty said. He tapped his pocket just for emphasis.

"You have no keys?" Masen sighed. "Where's your room mates?"

"They are _away_" I said pointing to the sky..I shouted 'away' cos for some reason I wanted to get across how far away they were. Yeah stupid I know, but you don't argue with drunken logic! I was cold, my teeth were chattering, I had no keys and I was drunk. This was not a good thing.

Masen sighed again and pushed me back in the car.

"Fuck it, you can stay at our place tonight".

**What did you think? Kinda intense huh? I wanted to get across that seeing someone die so horribly like that would really affect her. Shit, it would affect me that's for sure. I hope it came across ok.**

**Let me know as always what you all think:D **

**Sae xxxxxxxxxxx**


	8. Chapter 8

**Hey everyone, sorry for not updating earlier, this week has been manic!**

**This is Edwards point of view again, I dont have much of a clue about writing from a males perspective but I gave it a good bash, I hope you like it and get to understand Masen a bit more.... Yep, hes still an ass LOL!**

**Thank you heaps to my Beta Magenta and to my good friend Black Hale. They both seriously rock and if you havent read their stories Angel of War and Magenta Madness ... SHAME on you lol!! Get over there after this and check them out, they are fab!!!**

**I'm 27 today and feeling kinda sad, I'm not too pleased about getting old so I've been telling people I'm 25 all day lol! I had a cracking birthday present last night, I got to meet 3 of the Osprey Rugby players, Marty Holah, Filo Tiatia and Jamie Nutbrown ( All Kiwi's!!) and even though I would have preferred Robert pattinson in nothing but a bow I still loved it!!!  
Anyway, I hope you all enjoy the chappie!! **

**I don't own Twilight, But I do own some pretty cool emo daps!!**

**Edward.**

This was all I needed. A drunken Swan in the back of my car. If she puked in it there would be _serious_ hell to pay tomorrow morning, she would be cleaning it that was for sure!

I saw how much the accident at work had affected Swan, hell if affected all of us. Even McCarty got upset about it, I was used to it though, I saw this kind of thing all the time and while it was tragic I had eventually learned to detach myself from any kind of feelings. I learned the hard way after almost quitting myself when I was a newbie, I let myself get too emotionally involved and after losing 3 people in one go to smoke inhalation I almost jacked it in, so in the end I decided for my own sanity it was easier to just not think about things and got on with my job. My emotions got in the way of my job, and I needed to be in complete control so it was easier this way.

It was hard at first, but eventually death didn't bother me as much but sometimes, like last night, things would get to me.

I was extremely surprised at the fact that Lieu had rang me this afternoon to tell me Embry had quit. He said Embry told him he couldn't cope with seeing what he had and handed his notice in there and then. Lieu had offered the kid counselling but he insisted he was in the wrong line of work. Lieu had given him a month off work to get his shit together and told him if he wanted to come back after that he was welcome to but if he didn't then he would respect his decision.

This line of work is not for everyone, I get that, but he knew the risks when he chose this as a career and personally I thought he was being a pansy by giving in so easily but what the fuck ever, it was none of my business.

Swan had surprised me though , she had taken to this job like a duck to water. If I had money on the first to quit I would have bet against her, I assumed like everyone that she wasn't cut out for the job but she had proved us all wrong so far. She was dedicated, hard working and didn't take any shit off anyone. I liked that about her but I wasn't gonna tell her about it. I didn't wanna give the chick a complex.

I saw the argument between her and Embry and in all honesty I was seriously turned on by it. The girl had spunk and in a male dominated work environment she had proven she wasn't gonna be walked all over. I really liked that.

Despite that, personally she had been getting to me more and more lately, throwing smirks in my direction and bitching at me for no reason. Alright I might have given her a reason to be a bitch to me but it was so hard not winding her up, I loved seeing her getting all worked up.

She was fucking gorgeous but she was a serious pain in the ass. She would make me wanna throttle her one minute then pin her up against the locker room wall and fuck her senseless the next minute. It was seriously screwing with my head.

Since sleeping with her I had been desperatly trying to break things off with Lauren. I know everyone thinks I'm an ass for cheating on her but its not like I haven't been trying to end things. Lauren must have known I was planning on dumping her so she spent hardly any time with me, she was always 'busy'. She was just delaying the inevitable.

And as much as I wanted to be rid of her I couldn't do it over the phone or by text. Contrary to what most people think, I'm not _that_ much of an ass.

Whitlock had been asking questions too about how I knew Swan, I told him I didn't but the look on his face told me he wasn't buying my bullshit. I just told him it was complicated and he smirked before telling me he would find out eventually.

McCarty knew I had slept with someone behind Lauren's back but he wasnt aware it was Swan, shit if he did he would probably have knocked me out. He had become quite protective of her, especially since he had started boning her sister. He told me not to mention anything as Swan didn't yet know, they were just 'getting to know each other'. I'm sure by now though they_ 'knew_' each other pretty damn well.

When she had turned up at the fields to play football with us I was seriously pissed, I just wanted time with the guys without her ass as a distraction. I gotta admit I was a dick by not inviting her, I made up some bullshit story about leaving her a note on her locker which she seemed to have bought and then the following morning I got to work early and slapped a quickly written note on there. It's not like I didn't want her there, shes actually a really nice person, it was just that she really was a distraction, her firm ass was always in my eye sight and it took everything I had in me not to smack it.

I told McCarty I had invited her but that she obviously changed her mind, he failed to mention he had told Swan's sister about it the night before and they all showed up. But judging by the look on Swan's face when she arrived she had no idea what was going on.

She looked like she had been dragged through a teenage boys wardrobe backwards, she was even carrying a fuckin skateboard. _Who the fuck has skateboards these days? _Except for dudes like Tony Hawkes who make gazillions doing stupid stunts that might break their necks. No thank you, I would rather not have 2 broken legs in the name of sports. Football was fun though, I may or may not have tackled her to the floor again just to feel her under me. I was pretty sure by her blush and the way she was biting her lip that she knew what I was doing. What can I say, I like the effect I have on her. That lip biting shit makes me wanna bite her.

I was nothing but professional towards her while we were working, I couldn't let anyone know we had fucked, if Lieu found out he would be so incredibly pissed. And as I had just come back I needed to prove I was back on top form.

She carried out instructions and listened to me without questioning my authority which I liked in a newbie. Unlike that idiot Embry who was always trying to do more than what he was capable of.

The only time I had to give her shit was the night of the accident when she tried to run towards the flaming car. I had shouted at her to get back and she didn't listen insisting that there were people alive in the vehicle. I fucking knew that, but I wasn't about to risk my life or the lives of my company by pulling them out until the fire was under control,and I could see she hated that. Fuck we all hated it but there was nothing I could do, I was following orders too and I knew if I disobeyed the Lieu's orders I would be in the shit as well.

On the way to Joe's I had noticed she was crying in the back seat, I didn't say anything but I'm pretty sure she caught me looking. I hadn't seen her cry before and despite being an asshole I wanted nothing more than to pull over and hold her until she felt was pretty tanked later on the evening, she was knocking back shots like they were going out of fashion. I wanted to tell her to slow down but she would have thrown it in my face and told me to fuck off so I just left her stew in silence on her own.

Whitlock shared my concerns and actually went over to her while we were playing pool but she dismissed him pretty harshly from what it sounded like.

A little while later I ran into her as I was coming out of the toilets and asked her if she was alright. She sneered at me and said that she was fine and wanted to know why everyone was asking if she was alright.

She was slumped against the wall looking pretty damn defeated and I wanted nothing more in that moment to hug her and tell her it wouldn't always be like this but I decided that wasn't wise so I just settled for resting my hand on her shoulder which she shrugged off. I did _not_ hug so I couldn't understand the fucking ugre I had to hold her all the damn time. Hugging usually pissed me off but for Swan I could.. no_ would_ make an exception.

I told her things would get easier and that just because she cared it didn't make her a bad firefighter. In fact it was quite the contrary. I knew it would take a while for her to get to grips with her emotions while at work but she would eventually have to learn to detach her self from them, especially if she wanted to succeed in this job.

We chatted for a few minutes and this actually seemed to be a rather civil conversation. I usually wound her up, I loved seeing the fire in her eyes right before she gave me a bollocking. She was feisty and I loved it.

But this Swan was different, she was worn out and upset I could see that.

Eventually we headed home and I could see she was slightly more sober than she had been when we spoke in the hallway. I even saw her drinking water.

We headed to her apartment and I pulled her out of my car, I gotta admit seeing her head in McCartys lap both pissed me off and brought back memories of the night we spent in the hotel.

I propped her against the side of the car and tried to find her keys. All she had was some crumpled up paper, some money and someone's phone number which seriously infuriated me as I didn't even see her talking with anyone in the bar except the bar man. That skeeze!!

She tried to find them herself but couldn't, she was whinging about losing her phone too but I saw McCarty take that o ff her earlier in the evening as we were playing pool. It missed his pint glass by inches so he took it off her, I think he was more concerned about his beer being contaminated than the well being of her phone if I'm being honest. You do not come between a man and his beer!

She had been texting someone earlier and was singing "Got my drunk text on, I'll regret it on the morning". It had made me laugh even though I had no idea where the lyrics were from. So it was probably a good idea her took her phone texting never got anyone anywhere... except in trouble!

I found that out the hard way, I got hammered and text someone a few years ago asking for a fuck but found out the following morning I had actually text my mother! She and Carlisle found it hilarious but I was somewhat less than fact I was down right mortified, so now when we go out I either don't text when I'm drinking or leave the phone at home!

Finally in exasperation I gave up looking for the keys and pushed her drunk ass back in the car. She could stay at our place for tonight.

I pulled up to mine and McCarty's place and called out to Swan.

"Swan, wake up". No answer

"SWAN" I bellowed.

"Whoaa man, not so loud" McCarty yelled holding his head.

"She's asleep" I said pointing at Swan who was currently sprawled out on my back seat.

"I can see that" He replied.

"Fuck it she can sleep down here tonight" I said as I got out the car.

"Dude you cant leave her down here, she'll freeze" McCarty said, apparantly disgusted that I would say such a thing.

"Not if I throw a blanket on her" I said nonchalantly. What? She wont freeze if I get a blanket!

"No way bro, her sister will kick my ass if she found out"

"For fucks sake" I muttered.

I grabbed her arm and pulled her forward so she was sitting up. She snorted in her sleep which was _super_ attractive. I flung her over my shoulder and handed my keys to McCarty who locked the car up.

Swan was not as light as she looked and it took everything not to rest my hand on her ass which was over my shoulder and incredibly close to my face. So instead I opted to hold her behind the knees.

And if she puked down my back I would be totally pissed. I heaved her heavy ass up the stairs and finally in the apartment where I all but dumped her on the sofa.

McCarty headed to bed scratching his nut sack. He was charming, I just rolled my eyes at him and headed to the kitchen.

I got myself a beer and dumped a blanket on Swan who was now lying in the foetal position mumbling something about kung fu wasp's in her sleep. She might have been stunning but christ she was one weird chick.

I sat on the sofa watching the tv occasionally looking at Swan who now seemed to be rather content. I could see that she had been crying but her face was no longer blotchy. I had never seen her looking so fragile before, not that I had known her for very long but still you get what I mean.

Eventually at about 2.30am I decided to go to bed, I grabbed a glass of water and some aspirin and plopped them down on the coffee table hoping they would be the first thing she saw when she woke , I'm nice right?

I headed to the bathroom to take a shower and found for the first time today that I was finally relaxed. The thought of Swan being out with us tonight had put me on edge, I don't know whether it was the thought of her being around us or the fact that I knew she was drunk but either way I was nervous.

The last time we had been out we had gone home together and ended up having mind blowing sex and as much as I wanted a repeat performance I couldn't do it.. not until me and Lauren had broken up. I was a bastard for doing it to her once, and despite sporting a raging hard on permanently when Swan was around I knew I couldn't fuck her again.......... Could I?

Thinking of that night and the way she felt under me, the noises she made, made my dick hard. I knew I wasn't gonna be getting any tonight with the state she was in, and really with the way I had treated her over the last few weeks I doubted she would want to again. I felt like I had to piss her off in order to keep away from her. I thought if she hated me I was less likely to bend her over the dining table and fuck her in front of all the guys and so far it had been working. Her snarky comments were pissing me off thus I was staying away from her so my master plan was working.... kinda.

Lauren was avoiding me too, she knew I was about to ditch her so she was staying away from me and avoiding my calls so I knew I was getting none off her any time soon.

I decided it was in everyone's best interest if I wacked one off in the shower, obviously no one wanted to be around me when I was cranky and lack of sexual.... anything made me cranky... plus there was the fact that if I shot my load in here there was less chance I would go out into the living room and dry hump the gorgeous mess that was currently lying on the sofa.

I can guarantee she wouldn't appreciate that.

I propped my hand up against the tiles in the shower and grabbed my shaft, pumping furiously with visions of brown hair spraying out across my pillow. Her firm ass and perfect tits in my hands. Shit, I really wanted to feel that again.

I finally exploded calling Bella's name.

Bella? Fuck. I promised I wouldn't call her that again. She was Swan to me now, a completely different person in my head to the girl I spent the night with. I had to seperate the two of them in my head or things would get so confusing.

I cleaned up and got dried. I headed into my room to get dressed and went to set the alarm on my phone when I realised it was still on the coffee table in the living room,

I padded in there in my pj bottoms barefoot with no top on and stopped dead when I saw that Swan was now sitting up rubbing her head. She was sipping the water and groaning.

"Hey" I said moving toward her.

"Um. hi" She replied. It had only been about 3 hours since we left the club but already she sounded much better.

"We couldn't find your keys" I said dumbly. Evidently she knew that and she probably remembered everything anyway, she wasn't that completely wasted.

"Sorry" She said without making eye contact with me.

"Its no problem" I replied.

_Wow, this was awkward._

"Well. Good night" I said picking up my phone.

"Don't go" Swan said timidly.

"Pardon me?" I replied shocked that she wanted me to stay.

"I really don't wanna be alone right now" She said, her voice small.

"Erm Ok" I said rubbing the back of my neck. I didn't wanna sound like a prick. I was really fucking tired and wanted to go to bed but for some reason I couldn't say no to her, especially when she was sat there like that. All upset and girly and shit.

I sat next to her on the sofa wondering what the fuck to say to her.

I couldn't exactly say "hey remember the last time we got drunk? We fucked" Despite really wanting to.

Our arms were almost touching and I could hear by her erratic breathing that she was nervous being next to me like this. Fuck, I was nervous too.

"Are you alright?" I asked but winced when I remembered she didn't like to be asked that.

"Yeah, I'm ok. The room's still spinning but at least I'm sobering up"

OK, thats not entirely what I meant but it was good to know she wasn't out of her face still.

"Good" I replied reaching for the remote.

I flicked on the tv and we ended up watching Walking Tall with Johnny Knoxville and that wrestling dude the Rock. It was absolutely hilarious, Swan laughed all the way through. I actually enjoyed hearing her laugh, it was light and carefree. Lauren sorta snorted when she laughed and let out this high pitched giggle which used to set my teeth on edge. But Swan's was actually kinda pleasant.

We didn't really talk much, neither of us were really in the mood for chit chat. Ideally I would have loved to have bent her over the sofa and fucked her senseless but then internally scolded myself for thinking about it. Thinking like that set my fuckin dick on fire and every so often I would have to discretely try to adjust myself. I swear I saw her smirk on more than one occassion too so she must have known what was going on and the effect she had on me.

Eventually the movie finished and I'm pretty sure Swan was almost sober now so I stood up and stretched, my pj bottoms were hung pretty low so I knew she had a good view of the top of my 'V' as I had no boxers on.

She just happened to be drinking water at the time and ended up spluttering into her glass. It amused me that I still had affect on her. Fuck aye girlie two can play at your game!

I swear she had been folding her arms across her chest deliberately - just to push her tits up giving me a pretty nice eyefull. I wanted to bury my head in those bad boys and never come out.

I patted her back while stifling a smile. She shrugged me off and told me I was being a child laughing at her misfortunes but shit it was funny.

It was now around 4am and I was really fuckin tired.

"So, I'm gonna head to bed. Are you going to be ok out here?" I said to her once she was done spluttering.

"Yeah. Thank you for letting me crash here" She said.

"Are you sure you don't wanna sleep in my bed, I don't mind sleeping out here" Suddenly the thought of having her in my bed was overwhelming, just the thought of her lying beneath my sheets made me hard again. Fuck, I'm like a horny teenage boy. I just wacked one off for fucks sake, how can I keep getting hard? _Fuck Viagra, everyone needed a Swan!!_

I could see she was thinking about the offer, and I was secretly praying she would say yes.

"I don't wanna be an inconvenience I'll just stay out here" She finally replied. My heart kinda sunk at hearing her say this but I couldn't exactly insist she slept in there, she would think I was some kinda freak or something.

"Okay. as long as your sure" I said.

We were standing maybe about a foot apart but I could feel the sparks between us, I knew she felt it too. Her breathing was faster and I could see she was kinda flushed. I wondered.... no hoped she was thinking about being in my bed too, maybe it would remind her of that night and she would want a replay?

I smiled and nodded my head slightly at her and turned to walk to my bedroom.

"Edward?" Shit,I hadn't heard her call me that since that night and I gotta admit I fuckin loved it.

"Yeah?" I tried to play it off cool but my voice was kinda squeaky. Fuckin hormones again.

"I know this might sound really wierd but..... No,.. never mind its ok" She flushed and turned around towards the tv.

"No, go on. What were you going to say" I pressed in my most seductive voice.

"Your gonna think I'm silly" She replied still not looking at me.

I didn't really wanna say out loud that I could probably never consider her silly... fuckin hot, gorgeous and a pain in the ass yes, but not silly.

"Swan, just spit it out already" I huffed. She turned to face me but was still looking down at her feet.

"Ok, you can say no if you want, but would you please... could you.. can I please have a hug?"

_Oh for the love of god I think my knob might have just jumped for joy!_

"Er... Yeah.. I suppose" I shrugged nonchalantly. Internally I was giving myself a high five.

I stepped towards her kinda unsure, she followed my motions and walked towards me too.

She stepped into my arms and rested her head on my chest and I folded my arms around her somewhat awkwardly at first. I prayed she couldn't feel my raging hard on pushed into her belly, that would certainly ruin the moment. This wasn't anything sexual, it was her needing comfort. I understood that... My dick however, did not!

She snuggled into my chest and wrapped her arms around my waist. I had no top on still so she was pressed into my bare chest._ Did she just sniff me??_

Whatever, Ill take it. She smelled incredible too, despite having drunk a gallon of tequila. At least she didn't puke, that's one thing I cannot cope with. Fuck knows what I'm gonna be like when I have kids.... Where the fuck did that come from? Kids? ME? Hah, as if!

I wrapped my arms around her tighter, resting on her hips. I could feel bare skin under my finger tips as she stood on her tip toes to push her head into the crook of my neck. She jumped slightly at the skin on skin contact. I have no idea how long we stood there but the warmth of her skin against mine made my body tingle with desire. She had absolutely no idea what she did to me. How the fuck did she make a hug feel so damn erotic?. Its a really good job she wasn't sleeping in my bed cos I know for sure I wouldn't be able to control myself.

She sighed and pulled away from me, my chest was instantly cold.

"Thank you Masen" She said while looking at my pecs.

"Your welcome" I said back. I still hadn't released her from my arms. I know this sounds really fuckin cheesy but it was like she just fit perfectly.

I really wanted to stay like that longer but I didn't wanna push my luck with her.

I let her go reluctantly and told her I would see her in the morning. I'm not sure what the fuck possessed me to do what I did next. I lent down, cupped her head in my hands so I was touching the sides of her hair and kissed her on the forehead. I closed my eyes and visions of her naked flashed through my head. I pulled back and let her go before my thoughts got me into trouble.

I told her to get some sleep and I would see her in the morning.

I left her standing in the living room looking pretty fucking stunned with me kissing her. It was only her forehead but shit I wanted to kiss her again. I think it was me letting her know I wasn't a _total_ clusterfuck.

I pulled back the covers and slunk into bed. I was so tired but I knew I would not get any sleep tonight. It suddenly became very clear that Isabella Swan was going to be the fuckin' death of me!

**So, what did you think? go on, leave me a review, It is my burpday after all:p**


	9. Chapter 9

**Helloo everyone:D Sorry its taken me so long to update, I've been studying, hardly sleeping and well.. slack lol! I hope you like the chapter. **

**Thank you to my awesome Beta Magenta and to Katy Ord. You guys rock!**

**So heres the chappie. I dont Own Twilight yada yada yada.. BUT I am going to see the Ospreys tonight.... YAYYYY lol!**

**Chapter 9:Meeting the fiancée! **

I woke up with the most blinding headache. I thought my head was about to explode especially as it was now light outside. The sun light caused the most horrific pain above my right eyebrow and it was killing me.

I felt incredibly nauseous and just the thought of how much alcohol I drank last night made me want to vomit. I'm pretty sure I drank my body weight in Tequila. _Ughhh._

Whenever I go out I have a habit of remembering and last night was no exception. I remembered pretty much everything which made me internally cringe. How could I have been so stupid as to get hammered around my work mates? _arggghh._

I didn't however remember getting on Masen and McCarty's couch. I deduced that McCarty lugged my ass up the stairs and left me here to sleep it off.

To say I was shocked at waking up here earlier this morning would have been a gross understatement. And seeing Masen standing in the living room in nothing but his pj bottoms made me salivate. I was bricking it as he sat down next to me, I just didn't know how to react. I wanted to jump on his lap and chomp on his ear but I didn't think that would go down too well so I sat there next to him stiff as a board while trying to sneak peaks at him.

I knew that being in such close proximity to him was likely to set all my nerves on edge. And he stood and stretched and I caught a glimpse of everything except his junk. I almost fell off the sofa in shock and I just happened to be taking a sip of water at the same time and fucking choked, I was mortified. Not only had he seen me ogling his goodies but he also witnessed me spluttering and coughing my lungs up. _Perfect!_ The stupid ass actually laughed at me.

And fuck me, that hug was incredible. The minute he wrapped his arms around me I never wanted to leave them, I felt so warm and safe. He smelled incredible too, like shaving gel and soap but with a touch of manly Edward mixed in. I have no other words to describe how he smelled, it was pure Edward and I could sniff it all day. I ended up sniffing his neck while he was holding me and no sooner had I done it I mentally cursed myself. Of all the stupid fucking things to do. It wasn't an inconspicuous sniff either it was a sorta giant whiff and I'm pretty sure he knew what I was doing. _I really did have no shame._

I sat up slowly cursing the amount of alcohol I consumed and was incredibly thankful when I noticed that the glass of water and tylenol was still on the table. I swallowed them down and made my way steadily to the bathroom. Ohhh my head hurt,I really really should not have drank all of that booze. Alcohol was evil. _REALLY evil_.

I looked at my self in the mirror in horror. My hair was all over the place and the remains of my make up were streaked down my face from the amount of crying I had done the night before, I looked super sexy.

I would have to thank Masen when I saw him for not mentioining that I looked like a panda. _It was no wonder I was still single._

I managed to smoothe down some of my hair, I had looked around for a hairbrush but surprisingly there wasn't one around, so in the end I gave up and shoved my matted birds nest back into a pony tail.

I had some seriously bad morning breathe so I grabbed the toothpaste off the counter not wanting to use anyones tooth brush. Just the thought of using McCarty's made me wanna vomit slightly into my mouth. I saw the shite he ate at work and it was not good, there was no way in hell I was about to put that thing near my hand let alone my mouth!

After wiping toothpaste over my teeth and cleaning off the face paste off me I tottered out of the bathroom with the intention to grab my shit and leg it. I did not really wanna be there when Masen woke up, I was highly embarrassed as it was and the next morning encounter was always awkward even if nothing had happened.

I thought back to last night in Joe's, the conversations that I had with Masen, he assured me that I would get used to feeling so helpless and as much as I wanted to believe him it was hard.

I thought of myself as a caring person so the thought of not caring seemed impossible.

The house was quiet so I assumed it was still early and everyone was in bed. Im not sure what time Masen went to bed but I know it was late as we watched a film together.

I scoffed slightly at the thought of almost seeing Masen's lower regions again last night when he stretched, It was one view I wasn't likely to forget in a long time. I'm sure he did that shit deliberately just to make me choke as I was trying to get a glimpse of what was below his hips! I so wouldn't have been opposed to seeing his junk again but still I was swallowing at the same time and almost died.

He probably did what he did as I may or may not have accidently tried to push my boobs up when I folded my arms across my chest. Alright it wasn't an accident I knew what I was doing but it obviously worked as I could see he had a boner of a few occassions. He was wearing flannel trousers for gods sake, I could see his junk through there even when he wasn't hard!

I left the bathroom feeling better that I didn't have skunk breathe anymore and stopped dead when I saw Masen in the kitchen, he was bending over looking into the fridge. He hadn't seen me but I had one mighty fine view of his ass. I wanted to bite it.

He had gotten changed and had on light blue washed jeans and a white vest top which showed off his muscles. The way his shoulder blades flexed under neath the shirt made my stomach flip, I remembered running my fingers down his back as we had wild, passionate sex. I could feel my face get red just from the memory. My eyes trailed down to his ass again, I cocked my head slightly to get a better view and smiled . He really did have one of the sexiest asses on a man I have ever seen.

I had no idea he had turned to face me until he cleared his throat. Fuck, he had caught me staring at his ass. Im pretty sure I turned a vibrant shade of purple.

"Morning" He said smugly with a mischevious smirk on his face. "Breakfast?"

"Erm, no thank you. I'm good" I replied still blushing furiously. _How embarrassing!_

"Well that's good, as I can't cook for shit" Masen responded with a smile on his face.

"I'm gonna head off anyway, I need... I have..... things to do"

I didn't have shit to do, I just wanted a shower and to climb into my own bed and maybe spend the rest of the day thinking about the peen bulge I had seen in his pants the night before. Yes, I know im a fucking moron but sue me, I cant help that he's incredibly gorgeous. That's his parents fault!

"Alright, if your sure" He responded.

"I'm sure" I nodded at him and headed towards the sofa to get my hoodie.

I suddenly remembered that McCarts had my phone, I seem to remember texting someone last night and then singing but I couldn't for the life of me remember who I was texting which was unusual as I had remembered everything else from the previous night.

"My phone.... I need my phone" I all but yelled at Masen who was still in the kitchen in his tight ass jeans. Wow, he should have beeen a model or something, the boy was seriously fine!

"I'll go get it, I think McCarty's still in bed" Masen replied heading towards the bedrooms.

I stood there for a few minutes when the lock in the front door went, I spun round and came face to face with the brunette from the firehouse the day I found out Masen worked with me.

The look of horror on my face must have been evident and we didn't even do anything wrong.

Sure we had hugged which was really really incredible considering it was just a hug, it was by no means sexual but I really enjoyed it. If I could be wrapped in his arms for the rest of my life I would glady die a very happy girl!

"Hi?" She said but I could tell by the curious expression on my face that she wanted to know who I was and what I was doing here.

"I was just leaving" I blurted out.

_Nice one Bella, if she wasn't suspicious before she certainly will be now._

"Who are you?" She asked.

"I'm Bella.. Swan. I work with Masen and McCarty at the firehouse" I stupidly stuck out my hand for her to shake but to be honest I was just so shocked that she was here and that I was talking to her. I had never felt so incredibly guilty before in my entire life.

"Ohhhh I know who you are. I'm Lauren." She smiled brightly and grabbed my hand shaking it until I thought my arm might drop off.

"Yeah, I crashed here last night cos I lost my keys. Sorry" I muttered.

"Sure, no problem" She said with a wave of her hand. She beamed at me and put her bag on the counter.

Was this chick for real? If my shit hot gorgeous boyfriend had a woman sleeping over even if it was innocent ( this time!) I would have gone mental, whether that's because I had been cheated on before I dont know but still I would have hit the roof yet here she was acting like I was her best friend.

She headed into the kitchen and was yapping excitidly about finally meeting some more of Masen's work mates. Of course she didn't call him Masen, she reffered to him as Edward which actually made my blood boil for some reason, it seemed really personal to call him by his actual name rather than his surname like we all did.

"So will you be coming to the wedding?" She asked. Her voice was kinda nasally like she had a cold and I gotta admit that kinda bugged me.

"What wedding?" I replied dumbly.

"Mine and Edward's wedding, of course we haven't set a date just yet but its only a matter of time" She sorta snorted, I knew she was still talking but the word wedding was bouncing around in my head. I stopped listening to her after that.

He was engaged? I knew he had a girlfriend but I had no idea he was engaged. Images of Jake, the blonde, my engagement ring and his car flashed through my head. I hated that some slag had wrecked my relationship with Jake - I know he's just as much to blame as her but that's not the point - and here I was. I was now the blonde slag!

"Er, I er.. I have to go" I stuttered out. Lauren's face dropped, I knew she was all excited about her impending wedding but I needed to get the fuck out of there and fast. Where the fuck was Masen with my phone? No, scratch that, sod the phone I didn't wanna see him right now, who knows what I might say.

"Oh ok, It was nice meeting you. We should get together some time and... shop?" Was she really that fucking stupid? I didn't want to shop and certainly not with her.

"Sure" I muttered anyway.

I headed towards the door when I heard McCartys booming voice behind me.

"Where you going Swan?" He asked. He was wearing a pair of torn faded jeans and a Mariners Jersey.

"I gotta go home" I said flatly.

"No, don't leave me" He all but whispered. "Don't leave me with Bridezilla over there"

Luckily she had gone back into the kitchen and was singing something really hideous, I prayed for the windows! They were likely to shatter if she kept up that noise!

"I can't stay" I said, tears were stinging my eyes but I refused to cry, I didn't want to cry in front of him but I knew if I stayed any longer that it was a huge possibility.

"Ok, let me drive you home?" He practically begged me.

"Alright" I said. I was mortified, how could Masen have slept with me when he was engaged? Did she mean nothing to him?

I know I had fantasised about being with him again since finding out he was with someone but I never ever believed in a million years it would happen .

All my feelings from when I broke up with Jake flooded to the surface, I was angry with him, yes I was hurt but the anger seemed to keep that at bay. I figured the angrier I was with him the less likely I was to become a gibbering mess. I didn't want him to take advantage of me being so upset and lure me back in.

I looked up and saw that Masen had returned and was looking pretty fucking horrified himself that Lauren was here, he kept looking back and forth between the both of us. _Don't worry pretty boy, I didn't reveal your secret my brain screamed!_

He walked over to me and handed me my phone.

"Here" He said.

"Thanks" I tried to smile as I took it from him but I think it came across as more of a grimace. Our fingertips grazed as he put my phone in my hand causing goose bumps to break out all over me.

"So, I'm gonna get going. I'll see you at work" I told him without looking him in the eye.

"Sure" he replied.

"I'll just get my coat"McCarty said and hurried off back towards his room.

"I'll be out in the hall"

I nodded at Masen who smiled in return and headed back to the kitchen. Lauren must have thought I was gone as what she she said next shocked me to the core.

"So _shes _the lesbian? She doesn't look like a lesbian, she's really pretty too. I like her"

"Lauren will you keep your voice down please?" I heard Masen fire back.

_LESBIAN_? He told her I was a fucking _lesbian? _I didn't look like one? What are they meant to look like?

Now, I have nothing against lesbians, if that's your thing then more power to ya, I just prefer the old pork sausage if you catch my drift.

That tosser told her I was into women? No wonder she didn't appear to be threatened by me.

I was seething, beyond livid. I wanted to go back in there and tear that son of a bitch limb from limb.

I stormed to the elevator punching the buttons before I went back in there and smacked him into next week. McCarty appeared by my side within seconds.

"Right, lets hit the road" he said cheerily. _Ugh, Im glad someone's happy!_

"Right" I replied.

"You alright?" he asked me concerned.

"Im just fucking peachy" I seethed as I stepped onto the elevator. I knew I shouldn't take this out on McCarty but at the time all I could see in my head was me choking the life out of Masen.

"Lauren's a handful eh?" He said with a nervous chuckle. I couldn't take the small talk so I turned to him.

"She thinks I'm a lesbian" I blurted out.

"Ahh" He said while itching his forehead. He fucking knew, I could see by the look on his face that he knew she thought that.

"You knew?" I said completely astounded.

"Hear me out ok Swan, its kinda my fault . Remember the day you first met Masen when he came to the firehouse and she was there?"

"I remember" I said was the day I realised karma was a bitch.

"Well, she kicked up a huge fuss that a woman was on the squad and demanded that Masen transfer to another fire house, she was all wacked out at the time, he had just admitted that he cheated on her with some hottie in a club and she got all paranoid that he was gonna do it again"

.God, he told her he had slept with me? Unless he was a serial cheat and did it with someone else too. I had too many thoughts wizzing around in my head, it was beginning to hurt again. McCarty hadn't mentioned me so I assumed he didn't know I was the one that slept with Masen!

"What does that have to do with me being a lesbian McCarty" I snapped.

"I live with him Swan, she was coming over ALL the time and all I heard was her babbling about the woman that he worked with and I was getting sick of it so I happened to mention in passing that she had nothing to worry about as you preffered women anyway. And it worked cos since then she hasn't mentioned it. I had no idea you would actually meet her. I had kinda hoped he would be rid of her by now too ya know"

"They are _engaged_!" I screeched.

"Not on purpose" he yelled back. By now we had left the elevator and the building and were heading towards his car which was parked down the street.

"What?" I said, I was confused, how could someone be engaged but not on purpose.

"Long story, he bought a ring for his mom, Lauren found it when they went to dinner with her parents and she assumed he was about to propose and he wasn't, but cos her parents were there he went along with it in the hope that he could explain things to her later. He's not even that into her, in case you didn't notice she's really annoying"

"Wow" I was stunned, I mean I know its still bad, that poor girl was gonna be crushed when she found out how he really felt but I almost felt a little bit better about sleeping with him. How bad does that make me sound? I'm going to hell thats for sure.

"He's been trying to break up with her for months but she chooses not to listen and despite appearances he's not a complete douche. He doesn't wanna hurt her but he doesn't wanna stay with her either. Do you see?"

"Yeah, I do... kinda" I replied.

We headed back to my apartment in silence after that, I needed time to think. I had too many thoughts going through my mind and that on top of having a hangover was not doing my headache any good!

I sank onto the sofa with my head in my hands and sobbed. Not only had Masen lied to his fiance he had lied to me too. I felt so cheap. I had become the person I hated so very much. The 'other woman'. I know technically I'm not as it was only a one time thing but that didn't seem to ease the guilt I was feeling, not even close to it. In fact it made me feel worse.

I needed someone to talk to but it seemed like everyone was too close if that makes sense. I was constantly surrounded by people yet I felt so alone right now. I couldn't talk to Alice or Rose about the situation as they were now dating my co workers, I didn't want them to slip up and reveal my problems to the guys. I knew they wouldn't intentionally but I didn't want to make my life any more difficult by having them find out about me sleeping with Masen and still having feelings for him.

I was so confused, I knew I liked him yet I knew that we could never be together, I didn't trust him as he had cheated on his fiance and who's to say if we ever got together he wouldn't do it again?

There was no way I was risking going through that heartbreak again, once in a life time is bad enough but twice would surely cripple me emotionally.

I actually felt so terrible about what I had to done to poor Lauren, sure she was incredibly annoying but anyone could see how madly in love with Masen she was. McCarty had said that he didn't want to be with her, yet he still was.

He said Masen didn't want to hurt her, yet by stringing her along and letting her get so excited about her "wedding" he was doing just what he said he didn't want to.

I quickly came to the conclusion that he had no balls, if he didn't love her and want to be with her he should have told her. He was being an ass by letting her think he felt the same way.

I cried for a little while longer, I didn't know whether I was coming or going.

The accident had really shaken me but one thing I knew for sure was that I wasn't going to let it affect my job. I did contemplate quitting for a tiny moment but then the last year of my life would have been for nothing. Me falling out with my father would have been for nothing and even though I adored him there was no way in hell I was gonna give him the satisfaction of seeing me fail.

I hadn't seen my parents in a long time, my dad had made it perfectly clear that he didn't approve of my lifestyle which pissed me off no end. He should have been happy for me and accepted my job with no questions asked, thats what fathers do. But not my dad, he was stubborn as a mule.

My mom felt stuck in the middle, I knew she didn't mind my job, in fact she had told me on a few occassions that she was proud of everything I had acheived but I needed more. I wanted my dad to say he was proud and that he loved me and the only reason that would ever happen would be if I gave my job up and got back with Jake and there was no way in hell that was gonna happen.

I just needed a friend and I realised that other than Alice and Rose who technically I didn't consider a friend, she was my sister it was different, I had no friends. No one I could go to when I needed to talk or to listen to and that made me feel terrible.

I could tell Jake everything, he was my rock. But now I had no one.

I sobbed some more and then finally dragged my ass off the sofa and got a shower. The girls were due back this evening and as I was off until tomorrow I decided to cook dinner as a welcome back sorta thing.

3 hours later Alice and Rose appeared home. I welcomed them with hugs and smiles and pretended like nothing had happened this weekend while they were away. Of course I'm sure they would have been informed otherwise but they chose to let it go which I was eternally grateful for.

We had a chicken stir fry for dinner, quick and simple and then we talked for a while. Apparantly my mom was upset that I didn't go home with them but Rose told her I was working. The truth was I couldn't stand to see the disapointment in my dads eyes when I came home. And there was always the chance that I might bump into Jake and I really didn't wanna have to deal with him right now.

I decided to call my mother and apologise for not coming home, I really could do with hearing her voice right now.

On the third ring she picked up.

"Hello? She sang.

"Hey mom" I said.

"Bella? Oh sweetie, how are you?" She sounded so pleased to hear my voice. It hadn't been that long since I called.... had it?

"I'm good, sorry I've been working loads" I lied, I had plenty of days off, days that I could have called or even visited but I didn't....... cos I'm a shitty daughter.

"It's ok baby I understand"

"How's dad?" I enquired.

"Ahh you know, the same" I rolled my eyes, my father was a creature of habit. He would never change. He still had the same routine he did 10 years ago. Work, home, football game in his favourite chair, fishing at the weekends with Harry Clearwater and Billy Black. Just thinking of him reminded me of Jake and I cringed.

"He's fishing?" I asked.

"Yeah, has been all day, no doubt he'll be home soon with 10 smelly fish that will stink my kitchen out for days" She chuckled.

"I miss you mom" I said suddenly feeling homesick.

"Aw baby I miss you too. Are you alright?"

"I'm ok, just feeling a little nostalgic is all, I'll come home soon"

"Good, its been way too long, you know Jakes been around a few times"

I groaned, that was news I did _not_ want to hear. Why did he need to go to my house? We weren't together anymore, he had no reason to be buttering up my parents like he did when we were 16!

"Bella honey, I know you don't want to hear this but he's changed"

"Mom, no. Not you too! I can't deal with this right now" I practically yelled. Here I was telling her how much I missed her and she see's it as an opportunity to try and convince me to get back with that moron. Did he honestly mean more to them than my happiness?

"I'm sorry, its just you sound so unhappy"

"I'm not unhappy, I'm homesick. And for your information, I don't care now and I wont care next week about Jacob Black so please dont mention him to me again."

"I'm sorry" She replied quietly.

I was annoyed now, I sighed out loud and told her I would ring her again soon and hung up.

I didn't need this now, she had told me before she thought Jake was an ass for cheating on me and now she was taking his side? This was seriously fucked up. And she wondered why I hardly ever went home!

Jacob Black was my past. I felt nothing but hate for him, and if I never saw him again it would be too soon.

I spent the rest of the evening sulking much to Rose's annoyance. She told me to snap out of the mood I was in and quit being such a pussy. She had been spending _way _too much time with McCarty. I just rolled my eyes and let her yap about how Forks was still the most boring place on the planet.

She had bumped into Mike at _his_ sporting goods store and said he was asking about me. I hadn't seen him in years, he had gone to Chicago for school and then I believed dropped out and took over the shop after his father was diagnosed with Cancer. He was doing well, I was pleased for him.

I had been meaning to get in touch but we were all so close to Jake in school that I figured he had probably heard what happened. I know its bad but I assumed he would have taken Jake's side. I knew both Sam and Quill had. They were good friends with him and still kept in touch with him. I had heard that they were slagging me off after I blew up Jake's car and despite what I had done Jake had defended me. Yeah, whatever. He knew I had only done what I did because he couldn't keep his shlong in his tightie whities.

I cleaned up and headed to bed around 10pm, I needed to be up early tomorrow for work so I ironed my uniform and got my shit together before finally collapsing in my bed. I looked out over Seattle which was actually kinda pretty at night time. I couldn't sleep straight away though, I kept thinking about Masen and how kind he was to me last night. My stomach flip flopped when I thought about him sitting next to me and then hugging me. But then when I thought of Lauren my stomach would drop instead.

I knew my feelings for him were pretty intense, but I wouldn't act on them, I couldn't. Jake meant the world to me and he broke my heart when he cheated on me, and I knew that Lauren would feel the same way. Despite my feelings for him I knew I had to keep away from him. I would not let him affect my job or my emotions. I was stronger than that. I had never let anyone control how I was feeling before, except maybe Jake and look where that got me.

I promised myself to never be that dependant on someone again, I was strong. No man is ever worth your tears, I heard someone once say. And I vowed never again to cry over a man. I needed to stay away from Masen, he was bad news!

**So what do we think? Think Bella can stay away from him? I don't wanna stay away from him, I wanna lock him in my wardrobe lol! **

**Thank you also for my birthday wishes, it was really lovely of you all:D**

**Next chapter will be up next week sometime. I have a huge arsed essay due on Freud and psychoanalytic counselling in action... YAY(!) So, I need to get some of that done before I get the next chappie up. I swear Im gonna need therapy after this course! Gah!**

**Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, you guys totally make me beam!  
See you next week:D **

**Sae xxxxxxxxx **


	10. Chapter 10

**Hey everyone, first I would like to apologise for how long it took to post this chapter, I've been so busy the last few weeks I've been barely able to write :( I have a huge essay coming up so I've been studying and all that.**

**Thank you to my awesome Beta Magenta for reading this and checking it all for me. And to Katy for my shit hot reviews!**

**Here's the next chappie, I'll try and get the next one out this week sometime before I have to start my monster essay.**

**Did any of my fellow Welsh buds happen to catch the Ospreys game last night on S4C? OMFG I was screaming at the tv, what an awesome game! We are now the Magners league cup winners:D Ok enough waffle here we go:D**

**I dont own Twilight... but I am going on holiday to Turkey next year! YAYY lol!**

**Bella**

The next few weeks passed relatively quickly. I was actually really shocked to hear that Embry had quit. I felt terrible for being such a bitch to him and never having the chance to say sorry for going off on him the way I did. I know he had acted like an ass but I put it down to him just trying to fit in with the guys. Stupid I know, but I know that some people will do anything to be accepted.

Lieu didn't tell us anymore about where he had gone or why but I assumed it had something to do with that horrific accident that affected us all so much.

I had thought about leaving but I knew deep down that I couldn't, I would miss it too damn much.

I kept my promise and stayed away from Masen. Other than when were working I had very little contact with him. In the firehouse I was polite but I kept things short. I could see he was getting pissed by my attitude but it was him that said I needed to detach myself from my feelings and this was me doing just that.

It took everything I had not to jump on him, especially when he would flash my favourite smile or walk out of the weights room in nothing but a pair of shorts but I kept my cool... In front of him anyway.

I would then dash to the bathroom and stay there until my heart beat had returned to its normal pace and my face wasn't red anymore.

_Jesus christ, how can one person have this much of an affect on me?_

I knew he was trying to get to me by prancing around in next to nothing and I had to keep reminding myself that I was stronger than he thought. And I was.. right?

I came back into the firehouse after a call one evening to be told that someone had been here looking for me.

I asked who it was but O'Hara the guy brought in to cover for Embry just shrugged and said the guy didn't want to leave his name. I thought it might have been the guy Tom from the hospital, the one I sat with while the F.D were cutting him from his car. I had no clue who else it could be but I thought if it was important they would come back.

At about 9pm that night we had a call out, we had been chilling in the rec room playing pool and joking around. I lost miserably to both McCarty and Santiago so in the end I gave up. I was never much good at games, I was such a sore loser and would constantly accuse my opposition of cheating when in fact I just sucked.

It reminded me of a time when I was about 11. Rose, myself, Mike and Jake were playing monopoly. I hated that damn game, even to this day. I lost _badly_. I went bankrupt so instead of telling Rose well done for winning I reached across the board, slapped all the pieces everywhere and then pulled her hair before stomping off into the kitchen. _I was a delightful child!_

_It still bugged me that Jake was in almost every one of my child hood memories._

We all piled down stairs, flinging on our gear and racing to the truck.

I always got such a rush before we arrived at the location, Im not sure whether it was anticipation and fear at what we were about to arrive at or whether it was just cos I loved the job so much and enjoyed going to work..either way I was sat in the back of the truck with my leg bouncing and my stomach churning, it was the same every time we had call out .

We arrived at the address, an abandoned warehouse on the outskirts of town, but normally when we arrive there are obvious signs of a fire. Mainly the giant fuck off cloud of black smoke billowing from the fire but there was nothing.

We got out and looked around, no smoke, no fire.

We had to check the building to double check but I was pretty sure I had just encountered my first bogus call._ Great!_

"Swan" Masen bellowed.

"Yeah" I shouted back.

"With me and Whitlock, we'll check out the inside"

"Yeah" I shouted back.

"McCarty, Santiago, you guys check the perimeter"He ordered.

Anyone would think he was after Lieu's job.

"Sure thing _boss"_ McCarty retorted saluting him. I sniggered and followed behind him carrying my axe.

We checked the first floor and found nothing, and then the second again we found nothing. The third floor was also empty and showed no signs of a fire.

The place was clear.

"Back downstairs guys" Masen instructed, so we did as we were told and headed back down stairs. I looked around and it appeared someone lived here. There was a makeshift bed on the floor and clothes strewn around the place. There were empty food cartons discarded on the floor so I wondered if someone actually did live here or whether it was from a while ago.

"Swan, lets go" Masen called.

I hadn't realised I had stopped to look around.

"Sorry" I replied and headed down behind him, even in his turn outs I could see the boy had an incredible ass. I gotta say I had been fantasising about seeing and feeling that ass again for a long time.

My head told me to stay away from him but my traitor body ignored it. It was like his body called out to mine, I wanted to be near him all the time. It made staying away from him so much harder when all I really wanted to do was drag him into the shower and fuck him stupid.

We left the building and McCarty told Masen that the exterior was safe and there was no fire to be seen. We headed back to the firehouse feeling slightly pissed off, because of some idiot someone could have died because we were attending a bogus call out. I would never understand why people did such irresponsible and selfish things.

We got out the truck and changed out of our turn outs and headed back up stairs. It was now almost 11pm. I was tired but not tired enough to relax and fall asleep.

The guys had a habit of being mischievous when people went to sleep.

Poor Jones fell asleep in a chair last week and McCarty, Masen and Whitlock put plastic cups half filled with water all over him and then use a fog horn to wake him. Naturally he jumped at the noise, the water went all over him which made the boys fall to the floor in fits of giggles.

Jones vowed to get them back but so far no retaliation had happened. So needless to say I didn't want to go to sleep just yet incase I woke up with only one eyebrow or something.

Masen strolled past me brushing against my arm causing me to involuntarily shiver.

_Damn my body and its traitorous ways!_

Even his damn smell caused goose bumps to break out all over me.

I heard the smug git snigger and I snarled at him before walking into the rec room and plopping myself down on the sofa next to Whitlock.

"Hey" He said as I sighed loudly.

"Why cant life be simple huh?" I asked him.

"Well that would be far too easy now wouldn't it" He simply replied.

His smile was infectious and soon I was smiling with him, he was such an easy person to get on with.

"So, how are things with you and Alice?" I asked.

"Fantastic actually, I think shes amazing" He replied

"Oh my god Whitlock, did you just blush?" I sniggered.

"Oh shut up, this coming from the person that can't even look at Masen without turning a very dark shade of purple."

"I do _not_" I argued back. I was pretty sure I had just turned red at what he had just said, if he had noticed it who else had?

_God damn stupid bodily reactions._

"You so do Swan, I see you swooning"

"I do not _swoon_ I'll have you know. I don't swoon over anyone"

"Sure you don't" He smiled again and stood up.

"Catch you later Swan" He smirked at me before leaving the room.

God damnit that boy like eyes like a hawk, I hadn't realised I was being so blatantly obvious in my 'swooning' as Whitlock so eloquently put it.

I slammed my head back against the back of the sofa and exhaled. I heard a shuffle and turned my head to see Masen standing against the door frame with his arms folded.

I rolled my eyes and looked away, I didn't want him to catch me looking at him too although I was pretty sure he already knew. When did these guys become so observant?

"Having fun?" He asked. I could even hear the smugness in his voice.

"Nope" I replied.

"Mind if I join you?" he asked me again. _Oh be still my heart!_

As much as I wanted that, I didn't trust myself!

"Don't you have someone else to annoy?" I replied without looking at him.

"Nah, you'll do just fine" I couldn't help but wish there was a double meaning to his words!

"Fantastic" I retorted but inside I had some serious butterflies going on.

"So, shouted at anyone today?" He asked me.

"No, but theres still about 30 minutes left in the day so carry on irritating me and you'll be next on my list!" I looked over to him and he plonked himself down at the opposite end of the sofa and looked over at me.

My heart started racing at the intensity of his gaze. Did he know he had this affect on me? Was it just me that acted this way or did he dazzle women all over the world like this?

"Oh Swan, you say the nicest things" He teased. I kinda liked the playful side of him. He could be so intense sometimes that seeing him like this was like a breathe of fresh air.

"So, did you want something in particular or are you just here to see how much you can annoy me?" I looked over at him and he had almost mimicked the way I was sat. He had his head back, not looking at me but staring at the ceiling and his feet up on the newly replaced coffee table with his arms folded over his chest.

"I was just passing by and came to see if you wanted any company"He replied.

"No not particularly"

I was hoping he would just go away. Being this close to him and not be able to touch him was almost painful.

He didn't respond but he didn't move either so I thought now was a perfect chance to ask him about what had happened a few weeks before in his apartment.

"So, hows Lauren?" I casually asked.

I could see him tense up even though he was all the way over on the other end of the unfolded his arms and rubbed the back of his neck, still not looking at me.

"She's... she, yeah she's ok. I think"

"You think? How can you not know?"

"She's kinda not talking to me at the moment. I broke up with her."

My heart almost stopped. I know I should have felt for the poor girl but all I wanted to do was jump on him and help him celebrate! I shouldn't be feeling so pleased about this, he was still out of bounds.

"Oh" was all I managed to say. We were silent for a few more minutes before I plucked up the courage to ask something else.

"So you told her I was a lesbian" I stated, this was not a question.

I could see he was gobsmacked by what I had just said.

He tried to talk but nothing came out, his mouth opened and closed like a fish.

Seeing him squirm kinda made me smile, I had never seen him lost for words before it made me chuckle.

"Relax, McCarty told me why" I rolled my eyes and lent back against the sofa again.

"It was just easier that way, you know?" He said.

"Yeah" I replied.

_If only things were that easy for me._

"You know, I don't think your a lesbian right?"

"I know" I said trying to act like this conversation wasn't really that wierd.

"Especially after_ that _night, I kinda got the impression you were into men"

.god. This was the first time we had actually talked about our little encounter and to say I was shocked and uncomfortable would be an understatement. I blushed bright red and looked at the floor.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to embarrass you its just that I assu..."

He didn't get to finish his sentance, the alarm was sounded. We had a call.

I sprang into life and headed for the stairs while McCarty and Masen darted for the pole and flew down it.

The term saved by the bell could not have been more accurate, this call had certainly saved me from one hell of an awkward conversation.

I grabbed my turnouts and darted into the truck.

"Where we off to?" McCarty shouted over the sirens.

"Warehouse fire on 2nd Avenue" Lieu shouted.

"Hang on, is that the one we were at earlier?" I shouted back

"Yeah"

_Great. It was probably another bogus call._

We arrived and I threw my hat on before exiting the truck.

There was no smoke, no one around. Nothing. _Again._

This was stupid, fake calls cost money and lives. I slammed my hat down as the guys went about their work, checking the inside out and outside again.

Once the all clear was given we headed back to the house for the second time that night without having gotten any action. It totally sucked I looked forward to call outs so I can try to do some good, but tonight blew.

We got back to the firehouse and again removed our turnouts and helmets leaving them where they should be.

McCarty decided to keep himself awake and entertained he would wash down the truck with the help of Masen.

I decided I wanted to go upstairs and do nothing but sit down and think about what had happened before our almost call out.

Masen was now single? I didn't know whether to be pleased that he was now free or sad for Lauren for going through almost the same heart break that I had endured?

At least now I got out of going shopping with her. And who knows maybe I can sleep with Masen again without worrying that his crazy girlfriend is gonna walk in on us and whoop my ass. I mentally smacked myself in the head for thinking something so ridiculous. Of course I wasn't gonna be sleeping with him again. Maybe.

Whitlock and Santiago had decided to get some shut eye and warned me not to let either Masen or McCarty up the stairs especially if they were armed with shaving cream, feathers and tweezers. I didn't ask questions I just told them I would keep an eye on them

As If I could stop them if they did decide to do something horrendous to my sleeping colleagues . Actually it kinda sounded fun, I would probably let them go up just to see what they had planned.

I was bored. There was nothing on the tv at this time of the night and there was no way in hell I was cleaning that damn truck again, I did it the other night.. _alone! _

I walked past the fire pole a few times, eyeing it up and down. Believe it or not, I had never actually used this one. I chose to leg it down the flights of stairs rather than dive on the pole. I would probably miss and hit the wall behind it breaking my nose instead.

No one was around, I could get away with practicing how to use it without the guys laughing at me.

I opened the small wooden door that closed off the pole when no one was using it. Reaching out I grabbed the pole with my hands and then pulled my legs so they were wrapped around it. I clung to that bad boy for life, but I wasn't moving. Surely I was meant to slide down? The guys made this look so effortless so why was I not going anywhere?

I looked down and saw how high we were and shit myself. How could I forget I didn't like heights?

I panicked and tried to get back onto the platform but as I let go to reach for the door to hoist myself back off the pole I slipped and went flying down the shaft towards the floor.

I squeezed my eyes shut as I fell and landed on something not as hard as I expected the floor to be.

I heard an "Ooomph" and realised I had actually landed on _someone._

"God damnit woman, what the hell are you doing?" McCartys voice came from under me.

I cringed. This was not good!

I hadn't fallen very far but my ass hurt, I pulled myself up and looked up to see Masen looking at me with a rather peculiar look on his face.

_Great, I was now a laughing stock. _

"Swan, get off me" McCarty bellowed.

"Sorry man" I said as I stood up rubbing my now probably bruised ass cheek.

"What were you doing?" Masen asked me.

"I was trying to use the pole, I think its broken" I winced as I looked up at it.

"_I'm _the one that's broken, you landed on me" McCarty screeched. I couldn't help but burst into fits of giggles.

"I'm glad you find this funny, you could have seriously damaged my goods"

I was now laughing so hard I could barely breathe, I was snorting and cackling. I must have sounded so sexy!

"Why didn't you use the stairs?" Masen asked me. Oh he was so boring.

"Cos I wanted to test the pole" I said back, while trying to compose myself. My ass was now throbbing.

"You really are strange" He said and walked past me with his arms folded.

So much for the Mr nice Guy act I had witnessed earlier. I just cocked an eyebrow and turned around to face a really pissed off McCarty. I stifled a giggle.

"Swan, next time you want to play on the pole, make sure there's no one around for you to land on" He said with a serious look on his face.

"Oh come on man, I said I was sorry. It was funny." He didnt respond he just carried on walking towards the front of the fire house.

_Sheeesh, lighten up!_

I waddled back towards the stairs still holding my behind.I would have a bruised ass tomorrow that was for sure. Even though I was in pain I still found it rather amusing!

Maybe 3 hours later we had yet another fire call to yet the same location. I was all up for boycotting it and letting the hoax callers see they hadn't suceeded this time but we knew we couldn't do that so we began the repetitive task of throwing on our turnouts and getting into the truck. I was somewhat slower than normal as I had a seriously sore tush which McCarty and Whitlock laughed at. I had laughed at McCarty so I guess it was only fair that he laughed at me for walking like John Wayne.

As we approached 2nd Avenue we saw that smoke was billowing from the roof of the building. Even in the dark the smoke was clear. The top floor of the building was glowing a glorious orange colour. It was definitely on fire.

"Alright, we got a live one" Santiago shouted.

"Masen and Swan. Ground floor"

"Lieu" We shouted.

"Santiago, McCarty, Outside.

"Jones, man the pump, O'Hara you and Whitlock check the second floor"

"Sir" they replied.

I pulled on my protective head gear, my mask and threw my helmet on and headed towards the building with Masen.

We entered the building and stayed with each other and low to the floor. The air was cleaner closer to the floor.

We scoured the entire first floor and found no one. So Masen radioed Lieu to tell him. We doused the place with water from the hose that we carried in just in case we missed a hot spot and it went up in smoke after we had left.

We then got the hell out of there. It was a really intense fire, there was so much smoke.

We got outside and I whipped off my mask. Masen did the same, soot covered the underneath of our noses.

"Good job guys" Lieu called.

McCarty radioed through to say the outside was all clear, and Whitlock said the second floor was clear and that they were heading up to the third to check and to put the fire out.

"Lieu the floors coming down" O'Hara shouted through the radio.

"Get the hell out of there boys"Lieu instructed.

"Understood" O'Hara replied.

I looked on anxiously as they fled from the building, we would have to try to get control of the flames from the outside.

Lieu must have radioed for back up as another fire truck from another house arrived to help.

We had been battling the fire for a good twenty minutes when we heard a smash.

I looked up and my heart dropped when I saw a person leaning out of a huge window on the third floor.

"Lieu" I screamed. "Up there"

"Guys, Third floor, last window on the left. We need to get a ladder up there as fast as we can, there's a vic trapped in there" He shouted to everyone.

We all pulled together and got the ladder up but I could see it wouldn't be high enough. I could hear the man screaming for help.

"Masen. Don't you dare" I heard Lieu shout.

I turned to see Masen running for the building.

"No" I said to myself. My heart sunk at seeing him run off into the building.

Masen disappeared into the burning building to rescue the man trapped on the third floor. Part of me commended his bravery and another part of me thought he was incredibly stupid for risking his own life in such a dilapidated old building.

Either way I was terrified. My heart was racing, I kept scanning the building, flipping between the window on the 3rd floor and the door hoping to get a glimpse of Masen.

What was he thinking? We could have pulled the guy out without going back inside, the old building was falling to pieces without being battered by a raging inferno. I hoped to God Masen would be alright.

I know he was experienced and knew what he was doing but the thought of him alone in there and in danger scared the living day lights out of me.

"Hurry" I muttered to myself again.

Time seemed to be going backwards. Where the hell was he? Why hadn't he come out yet?

I felt like screaming or running inside myself.

I looked around fractically and my eyes met Whitlock's who was looking at me curiously. His brow was furrowed and his jaw was tense. He obviously knew something was up, and wanted to know why I was acting so jittery.

He walked over to me and put his hand on my shoulder.

"Swan are you alright?" He asked.

"Where is he?" I hissed. "He should be out by now!"

"He's an experienced fire fighter, he'll be fine" He reassured me, but I felt no reassurance, I only felt dread. What if something terrible had happened and couldn't use his radio? We were all standing around out here like idiots.

"Someone needs to get in there" I whispered while looked at Whitlock almost silenty begged him.

Tears were pricking my eyes, I couldn't let anyone see how much this was affecting me so I turned around. I just wanted to sob. The thought of losing him, even though Masen wasn't mine to lose was too much to bear.

There was an almighty explosion and everyone hit the ground. My hands instinctively flew over my head, to protect myself from flying debris.

Luckily nothing hit me. I looked up and pushed the hair from my eyes.

I quickly scanned the building, nothing. No Masen. I was really panicking now.

"Lieu we need to do something" McCarty shouted.

"Masen" Lieu shouted through his radio.

"Masen can you hear me?" he said again.

There was nothing, I felt my heart drop and sucked in huge breaths of air to stop me from bursting into tears right there and then.

I couldn't work out why I was so upset. Maybe it was just the thought of losing a fellow fire fighter in such terrible conditions? I wasn't sure, but for some reason the thought of never seeing him again almost crippled me.

I suddenly heard shouting and turned around to see Masen running from the building with an unconscious man over his shoulder.

The paramedics had been called and in all honesty I didn't even hear them arrive over my own heart ache. They put the injured man on a stretcher and gave him oxygen. He was in bad shape but Masen was alive and to me thats all that mattered. I felt terrible for feeling this way, but I just could not help it!

_Damn my feelings._

Masen was seen by the EMT's who wanted to take him to the hospital for a check up. I heard him protesting that he was fine but they insisted none the less. He was carted off and we were left to clean up and get back to the firehouse.

I was drained when we got home. The sun was almost coming up and I hadn't slept in over 24 hours. I trudged up the stairs and headed up to the showers where I stripped and slid to the floor. I let the hot water cascade over me and soothe me. I dont know how long I stayed there for but no one banged on the door. They must have sensed my need to be alone right now and for that I was grateful.

I finally emerged and got dried off. I headed down the stairs still feeling really lethargic and zapped of energy.I wasn't even watching where I was going so before I tripped and ended up on the floor again I lifted my head. Heading up the stairs was Masen who looked just as frazzled as I felt.

What possessed me to do what I did next I have no idea.I practically launched myself at him. I grabbed him tightly around the neck and clung to him.

I felt his fingers graze my hips, I sighed loudly into his neck. Thank god he was ok, I knew he was but seeing him made me feel so much better.

"Whoaa" He replied.

I released him and looked at the floor. _Wow that was stupid of me._

"Sorry" I stuttered.

"Are you ok?" He asked me.

"I'm ok, I'm just glad your alright"

"Thank you" He replied clearly shocked that I had just attacked him on the stair case.

"I'll just be.. er.. I'll be down there" I pointed down towards the rec room.

"Alright" he smiled my favourite smile and I slid past him.

"Oh, hey. How's the old man you found?" I enquired.

"He was DOA. There was nothing they could do for him" Masen told me.

"Oh" I replied quietly.

Masen headed up the stairs to shower and I went downstairs to find the rest of the guys.

That poor man, no one knew he was inside. If we had we might have been able to get to him sooner. I just thanked god that Masen didn't perish in there too with him. I just hoped someone could find out who he was, so his family could claim him and give him a decent send off.

I looked back up the stairs to where Masen had disapeared to and felt my stomach flutter for like the gazillionth time today.

I didn't understand my feelings, they were so intense. They hit me like a ten tonne truck. I had never felt like this, not even with Jake. Staying away from Masen was going to be so much harder than I thought.

And to be honest I wasn't sure whether I wanted to stay away from him anymore.

**So, what do we think? We obviously know how she feels. Ill post the next chap in a few days. **

**I hope you all enjoy your bank holiday weekend! I fully intend on getting hammered tonight at our bbq~~ See you all later xxx **


	11. Chapter 11

**Hey girls first of all I would like to apologise for the delay, I have had a huge essay to write. But its finally done and sent so I can update this again:D**

**Thanks as usual to my awesome beta Magenta, she never fails to make me smile. I wanna say Good luck to Niki on her scan today... I cant wait to see the piccies:D A huge shout out to my fellow welsh bud Susan - Black Hale and a hugeeeeeee thank you Wendyaddictedtoff for the amazing reviews shes given me:D**

**Ok, enough jibber jabber onto the next chapter:D**

**I don't own Twilight but I do have tickets to go see Eclipse and I cant wait!**

**Chapter 11**

I woke up feeling some what relaxed and in a good mood. Chances are though with the fools I worked with, my good mood wouldn't last long so I decided to make the most of it.

The conversation I had had with my mother a few evenings before had gotten on my wick all night. I tossed and turned , but I finally decided at around 12am not to let what she said bother me. She was most probably stuck in the middle and was trying to see where I stood in terms of how I felt, I had however thought I had made that perfectly clear but apparantly not.

Jake had a way of sweet talking my parents, my mom especially, she was a sucker for a pair of pretty eyes and a smooth voice. _She would love Masen_ I thought.

Thinking of Masen made me remember how he had risked his own life to save a trapped man. My heart had almost exploded at the thought of him dying in that burning building. My feelings for him were intense I knew that but I also knew that I had to control them, there was no way I could act on them. It was wrong. Dating a work mate was stupid and not to mention frowned on. Lieu would go mad, and known my luck I'd get stuck on truck washing duty for the next year as punishment!

Even though Masen was now single I needed to keep my distance. I could not.. no would not let my feelings jeopardise my job.

Yes, that was a good plan.. in theory. In practice however it was another matter, we worked together and saw each other all the time, not to mention the fact that I couldn't stop thinking about him. My plan was flawed!

I got ready for work and headed down to my truck. Wow it was cold this morning, I so hoped we didn't have any call outs straight away, chances are my nipples would freeze off. They were already so sharp they could cut glass, I didn't wanna make it any worse.

It had been a really cold night, there was ice all over the ground and icicles were hanging off the entrance to the building. They had forecast snow for the rest of this week. _Fantastic!_

I climbed in and threw my bag onto the passenger seat.

Slamming the door shut I started the truck... only nothing happened.

"The fuck?" I muttered to myself, trying to start her up again. Not a damn thing happened.

My poor baby had died in her sleep, I was so not amused. I was going to be late!

It was too early to wake either Rose or Alice and as I was going to work I had no cash on me to get a cab.

And there was no way in hell I was walking down town in this weather , my teeth were already chattering .

"For fucks sake" I yelled slamming my hands on the steering wheel.

I had no other choice, I was gonna have to call McCarty.

I grabbed my cell phone from my bag, scrolled through my contacts and hit his number.

I was shivering at this point, thank god I was wearing a hat or my poor ears would have frozen off too.

Fucking typical, McCarty wasn't answeing his phone, I got his incredibly stupid voice recording instead. I rang back a few times and each time all I got was "_Hey Its McCarty, love machine ,extraordinaire. I'm not around right now, I'm probably getting lucky. Leave me some love. _

_Oh how proud his parents must be!_

I hoped to god he had a seperate phone for them or that could get seriously awkward!

I didn't have Whitlocks number, the only other ones I had were Embry's which was totally no good as he was no longer in the department or Masen's.

I sighed out loud and hit the call button.

He picked up after the third ring.

"Hello?" He answered groggily. I'm pretty sure I hadn't woken him as we had to be in work in like 45 minutes.

"Hey, look I'm sorry about calling you, I tried to ring McCarty but he wasn't answering his phone, I got his machine which by the way is totally wierd, have you heard it? Anyhoo I didn't wanna call but I had no choice"

"Swan?"

"Yeah?" I replied.

"What the fuck are you babbling about? Its far too early to be listening to that shit"

Alright so I sometimes babble when I'm nervous.

"Right, sorry. Er my truck wont start, I can't get to work. Would you be able to swing by on your way and come get me?"

I braced myself for him to tell me to fuck off.

"Sure, I'll be there in 10" And with that he hung up on me. Masen was such a charming person.

I started at my phone and said "Nice talking to ya"

He was so not a morning person that was for sure. Neither was I usually but I wasn't that rude to people. Ugh.

So far I was doing incredibly bad at the whole 'stay away from Masen' plan.

As much as I really wanted to keep away from him I just knew I couldn't. I know this sounds stupid and I cant really explain it myself but its like I'm drawn to him, I think about him when he's not around, I look at him when he is and all I wanna do is touch him. I'm like a fucking teenager with her first crush which by the way was Joey from New kids on the block. He could step by step to me anytime anywhere. He was 'delish' as Rose would say.

This was bad, I knew I couldn't be with Masen but I couldn't help wanting to be.

Pretty much 10 minutes later Masen appeared and honked to let me know he was there. I grabbed my bag and hopped out, locking my baby before I went.

Masen wasn't looking at me, he was looking straight ahead, his lips set into a thim grim line.

Well he was in a good mood. I loved nothing more than be around his cheery disposition at this time of the day. I rolled my eyes and got into the passenger seat.

Clearly _not_ a morning person!

"Thank you" I told him as I was buckling myself in.

"Right" he replied and sped off out the parking lot.

I tried not to look at him but every so often I would catch a glimpse of the muscle in his jaw flexing or see his hand tighten around the steering wheel causing the leather to squeak slightly. It totally turned me on.

"So the heap of shit finally died?" He asked as we were about 5 minutes away from the fire house.

"My truck is not a heap of shit" I replied defensively.

He looked over at me and I could see he was rather amused at this statement.

"Sure its not" He smirked back at me.

Just because he had a perfect new shiny car that ran smootly didn't make him any better than me.

I hated Volvo's. Especially ones like his.

We pulled into the fire house and I thanked him again, not that he deserved it after picking on my poor truck.

I hated this weather, it was so miserable. It seriously put a damper on my good mood which was at this point kinda non existent! Typical, I wake up in a good mood for the first time in a long time and shit like this happens to ruin it!

I stepped out of his car and waited for him to grab his bag from the trunk.

Heading over the road in true Bella Swan style I go and slip on a patch of ice. I heard the squeak of ice, and felt myself falling.

I braced myself for the impact, luckily I wore a hat and a thick coat today so if I was gonna hurt anywhere it would most likely be my ass which was still bruised from last weeks unfortunate pole incident.

I scrunched my eyes shut and waited to hit the ground and was very surprised when 2 strong arms grabbed me by the waist. Looking up I realised I was in Masens arms... _again. _Truth be told I loved it here. I should fall around him more often... although saying that the last time I fell he didn't catch me, he just implied I was an ass for messing around on the pole in the first place.

He seriously had a Jekyll and Hyde thing going on that was for sure.

I hadn't realised I was still staring at him, his eyes were so mesmerising.

I could see his lips moving but couldn't hear what he was saying, I was too interested in his lips and how he had the tiniest of freckles on the tip of his nose.

"Swan?" He said.

"Huh?" I said coming out of my day dream.

"I said, are you alright?"

I struggled up and held on to his forearms for support. Big thick strong forearms.. Yum.

"Yeah, I'm good" I certainly was, that was not a bad start to the morning that was for sure.

"You really are not very good on your feet. How the fuck you managed to get this job is amazing" He let go of me and picked his bag up.

He looked at me, shook his head while smirking at me and walked towards the fire house.

Wonderful. He now thinks I'm an even bigger moron than I was before.

I made my way inside the fire house staying on my feet the entire time and headed upstairs to my locker to drop my shit off.

The boys were laughing at something, probably me and my lack of gracefulness so I ran up the stairs 2 at a time praying I didn't land on my face.

As I came back down the guys were in the kitchen, 'A' shift had finally headed home and our shift had started.

"So Swan, I heard the beast finally kicked the bucket?" McCarty jested.

"Laugh all you want '_Love Machine_' She'll be back up and running in no time just you watch"

I sniggered at him and walked away leaving him and the boys laughing at my comment, Rose was so gonna be hearing about that answer message that was for sure.

Whitlock was in the rec room reading through a newspaper while eating toast, sending bits of bread crumbs flying everywhere.

"Morning Swan" He said with a mouth full of food. _Yep, that was attractive!_

I expected that sort of behviour from McCarty but not from him. I worked with Neanderthals.

I sat down as he shoved the rest of the toast in his mouth almost losing a pinkee in the process.

"Morning, watch your fingers there Whitlock, you look like your about to chomp one of those off"

I sniggered again. _Man I was on fire today!_

"Sorry, I'm starving. I was helping my neighbour move last night so I forgot to eat. I get cranky if I dont eat."

_Yep, I know the feeling_.

I laughed and just as I was about to relax the sirens started to ring indicating we had a call out.

"Great, so much for a relaxing morning." I said as I ran to the stairs.

I looked at the pole and shuddered, there was no way me and him were gonna be connecting again any time soon. I made too much of an ass of myself last time! Nope, I would leave the pole sliding to the pro's.

Grabbing my turn outs, jacket and hat I dived into the fire truck and plopped down next to Masen and McCarty. We were heading towards a car fire on 4th Avenue. I cringed remembering what happened the last time we attended a car fire. The look on the guys faces told me they were thinking the same.

We arrived on scene maybe 2 minutes later and rushed out, a car was indeed on fire but luckily the occupant, a business man had managed to escape. The car had burst into flames a few minutes after he had crashed into a wall.

The police were there and were checking to see if he was under the influence of alcohol.

I grabbed the hose with Jones and Santiago and we got to work putting the fire out, it wasn't a huge fire but it needed putting out.

I looked over and saw the driver being put into handcuffs and guided into the car which confirmed my suspicions that he was infact intoxicated.

How the fuck he managed to flip the car and plow it into a wall was beyond me, luckily it hadn't happened further up the street where there was an apartment complex or people might not have gotten out alive.

The fire was finally put out and we headed back to the fire house.

I looked over at Masen who was covered in sweat and soot as he was closest to the fire. Man he looked fuckable in his uniform. If only he had been wearing it that night.

Gah, I needed to forget about that night. I repeated in my head _stay away from Masen, stay away from Masen_ like a fucking mantra .

We headed back to the house and I kept sneaking glances at Masen who was sat opposite me having a conversation with McCarty and laughing. He looked gorgeous when he laughed, he certainly needed to do it more often. He was so care free when he laughed, I really did love it!

As I looked away I caught Whitlock looking at me with a curious expression on his face which kinda read '_we _will_ be talking later'_. Gah perceptive bugger. I just cocked an eyebrow at him and looked at the floor smiling to myself.

I managed to avoid Whitlock and his conversation for the remainder of the morning. McCarty was pissed at me as I talked him into arm wrestling me and then beat him... Ok technically I cheated by rubbing my boot up his thigh but it freaked him out and I won! I said nothing about playing fair.

It serves him right for not having the balls to tell me he was boning my sister! I knew that shit was going down, I'm not blind yet neither of them told me about it. So I thought I could use it to my advantage.

Of course the guys found it hilarious that I had beaten him and were ridiculing him all day about it.

I expected retaliation! Yes, he was _that_ childish!

Around 2pm I went into the rec room and plopped down on the sofa inbetween Masen and Santiago.

I rested my head on Santiago's shoulder. He was an older guy, married with 3 boys and had a heart of gold. He was like the 'daddy' of the group. He was the one everyone went to when they had problems. I absolutely adored him. He was such a likeable person.

He had invited us all out to his house on the lake for his son's 10th birthday this weekend. I was really looking forward to it, I hadn't been over to that side of town yet and was looking forward to meeting his wife Lucy and thier sons. The guys were all coming with their other halves and thier kids. I loved the fact that I would be there alone. Note my sarcasm? I hated that I was one of the only ones without a partner.

I had been informed by Rose earlier that day by text that she would be going with McCarty and Alice was going with Whitlock.

Fucking fantabulous. I would be stuck playing 5th wheel. Again.

The rest of the shift was good, I had a really good day just mucking around with the guys. McCarty had laughed with them about my pole sliding incident which of course made them all cackle like hyenas. Well I'm glad they all found my lack of grace amusing, I on the other hand found landing on McCarty even funnier, not the fact that I had a bruised ass.

At around 5 pm my good mood vanished for good. I knew it was too good to be true, someone always comes along and fucks things up.

I tell ya some people should come with a fuckin warning label.

Santiago yelled for me from the bottom of the stairs and said someone was here to see me. I wondered if it was the same person that came to see me before? I had no idea who it was but I knew if it was important they would come back to see me.

I grabbed an apple off the dining table before tucking my shirt in and heading down the stairs.

I could see a pair of shoes and legs, who ever it was was definatly male. No woman wore boots like that, except maybe Gracie Hart from Miss congeniality. I sniggered to myself and carried on down the stairs.

"Hello?" I said.

The person had disappeared around the front of the truck, probably being nosey and seeing what one is like close up. They aren't _that _interesting trust me!

I passed Lieu's office on the left and headed to the main door.

I had the shock of my life when I saw who had come to see me. It was the last person on earth I expected.

Standing in front of me, looking pretty fucking hot I might add was Jake!

Jake my ex fiance who had cheated on me, broke my heart into a million pieces, made me look a complete fool and then expected me to just take him back like nothing had happened.

What the flying fuck was he doing here?

"Bella" he said, looking down at me with those deep brown puppy dog eyes.

I couldn't breathe, my chest was so tight. Was it getting hotter in here?

"Jake?" Was all I managed to get out.

"Good to see you". He said while still smiling at me. What the fuck? He just waltzes back into my life after all this time and _smiles_ at me? Like_ that_ too. _Oh, I think not!_

"What are you doing here?" I stuttered out.

" I came to see you" He stated.

Well yeah captain obvious, I can see that.

"Why?" I was so confused.

"Because of the text you sent" His smile faltered slightly.

What text? I hadn't text him, I didn't even have his phone number anymore, sure I still remembered it but I had deleted it from my phone when I got a new number.

"What text Jake?" I was getting annoyed.

"Er the one you sent saying you missed me?" I could tell he was getting pissed, his jaw was tensing and his shoulders were heaving. Oh I loved those shoulders, so broad, so masculine... _FOCUS Bella!_

"Jake, I never sent you any text"

As soon as I said it visions of drunken singing and texting and McCarty taking my phone off me flashed in my head. Oh dear god I didn't? I fucking did, I text Jake when I was hammered. This was not good.

This was one of those epic face palm moments.

"I can show you if you like?" He pulled out his phone and scrolled through it before handing it to me. I looked at the date and the time and then the text which read. "_Jhake. I miss ourt talks, I miss yopur smell and your stronges armds. I miss you. Bellaq"_

Yep that was certainly drunken texting, the spelling was atrocious. I should be banned from taking my phone anywhere while intoxicated.

I know I was lonely but I certainly hadn't meant to text him and I definetly didn't remember doing it!

I looked up at him and he seemed... hopefull maybe? Did he think this text meant I wanted him back?

"Jake... I... I was drunk, I never meant to text you that"

"So you don't mean it? You don't miss me?"

He stepped towards me and I backed up against the front of the fire truck. I was so confused. Yes, I did miss him but I certainly didn't trust him and I knew deep down trust was more important than how I felt.

"Jake. Don't do this" I pleaded.

He knew just how to get to me. I hadn't seen him since the car incident and god he looked fantastic! He had bulked up, his shoulders were broader and the muscles in his arms more defined. They rippled through his shirt and caused my heart to flutter.

"Do what?" he whispered in that seductive voice of his and pressed his chest to mine.

I couldn't do it, I had come so far, I couldn't be treated like that again so I pushed with all my might against his chest and he stumbled backwards.

"Bella what the fuck?"

"Why are you here Jake? You thought after all this time I would just melt and come back to you? Do you forget that you cheated on me? You asked me to marry you and then you cheated on me. Do you have any idea how I felt? Did you even care? I'm not the same girl I was Jake, I don't need you anymore. I don't love you. Yes, I admit I miss you but thats only because you were such a huge part of my life for so long." I was out of breathe but the look on his face told me he wasn't happy with my speech.

He looked around and then down at my uniform.

"So your a fire fighter huh? I gotta say I didn't expect that. I knew you were still in Seattle but I had no idea where or what you did. Your mom accidently gave that up last week. She was upset about your phone call and spilled to me"

_Thanks loads mom_ I thought, how could she tell him where I was? She knew I didn't want to see him again. Maybe like Jake she thought that if I saw him again all my feelings would come flooding back and I would forgive and forget. Hah, not friggin likely.

"I think you should just leave Jake" I said sternly.

"I'm not done yet Bella. I'm sure your boss would love to hear about you blowing up my car. Is that where this little infatuation came from? Did you get a kick out of seeing it burn huh?"

I was seething, I knew this would come back to haunt me some day.

"What do you want Jake?" I said flatly. I knew that he could end my career in a split second, he could have but he didn't. He came to me first so he must have wanted something.

"I just want the chance to show you I've changed. Go out with me".

"You're gonna blackmail me into going out with you again?"

What the fucking hell was wrong with him? Did he lose brain cells after we split up?

There was no way in hell I was agreeing to this. It was insane. It was sick!

"Take it or leave it Bells" he smirked at me.

He was a smug bastard, more so than Masen's ever been. Right now Masen was a night in shining armour compared to him.

"I'm working Jake, I'm not talking to you about this now"

I turned to walk away when he grabbed the top of my arm. His touch was so different to Masens, it was hard and cold and painful.

"Let go" I spat.

"I'll be back for your answer Bella" he said through gritted teeth.

I snatched my arm away and headed back up the stairs without looking back.

He knew where I worked and now he had my phone number all because of a drunken mistake.

I was never drinking again, or texting. I can't believe how much of a moron I am sometimes.

We had one more call out that shift and I was like in a daze. I got yelled at a few times for not paying attention or not doing the right things. I was a mess. I had a migrane from thinking too much. I could not wait to get back home and have a night not shower and probably cry.

I couldn't believe Jake could do this to me. Blackmail me into going back out with him or I'll lose my job? Who does that?

Masen was giving me shit and giving me his bitch brow, I just didn't know what to do about Jake. I wasn't about to give in and go out with him, there was no way I was letting him get away with this.

Maybe I could speak to Lieu and tell him about the situation. It would be better if he heard about it from me rather than off someone else. And chances are Jakes version would be much different to mine making it harder for me to redeem myself.

The drive back to the fire house was so long.

"Swan? What the fuck is up with you?"McCarty shouted.

"Sorry" I mumbled.

"Whatever it is, snap the fuck out of it."He yelled back.

I blinked back the tears and looked over at Masen who was doing the furrowed brow thing again, I'm not sure whether he was thinking or whether he was constipated but I ignored him either way and looked out of the window.

We got back to the house and I looked around frantically trying to catch a glimpse of Jake. I wondered if he had been watching me? He usually is the kind of person to sit and think about things before doing them so it made me wonder how long he had been planning on actually confronting me. He probably knew where I lived by now too.

I was so conflicted, my head was telling me to keep away from him as he hurt me so badly once but my heart missed him and how we used to be. I'm still not sure though whether I missed him as a boyfriend or just missed the good times we had together while growing up?

I changed and was the last one to head up the stairs.

I sighed out loud and shook my head, this was seriously one fucked up situation. I knew someone would come and fuck up my day.

I got upstairs and saw no one was around, the guys were probably showering and getting changed while swapping stories about their latest conquests or showing each other who can burp the loudest for the longest. As you can imagine I wanted to stay well away from that!

"Swan?" Masen called me from the weights room.

I turned to see him top less, lying on the weights bench, pressing a hell of a lot of weights!

I could see the muscles in his stomach tighten everytime he raised the bar above his head and brought it back down again.

His arms were bulging and I so wished in that instant I could straddle him and do unspeakable things to him!

I got that I still wasn't over Jake, I didn't expect to get over him fast anyway not after all the years we had known each other and because of the fact that we were together and to me seemed the perfect couple.

But my feelings for Masen were different, they were so intense and unknown. I knew I didn't feel this strong for Jake.

I forced my eyes away from his abs and moved up to his face, I hadn't noticed he had put the weights down and was now looking at me while still lying down. Yet again he had seen me staring at him, heat burned my cheeks as I saw the familiar smirk cross his lips.

_Great!_

"Sorry, you called me?" I said while still feeling slightly flushed.

"Yeah, I think me and you need to have a little chat" He stood and wiped his hands on a towel.

"A chat? About what?" I enquired. I was confused.

"About what your friend Jake had to say about his car"

_Oh fuck!_

The colour from my face rushed to my feet. This would not end well, Masen knew I had burned Jakes car.

_Shit, my career was over!_

**Rut roh Did you all guess that it was Jake that was visiting? Is Masen gonna grass her in? Im in the process of writing the next chapter, I've been really slack. Usually I have 2 or 3 chaps on my pc and update them weekly but I've been working so hard on this damn essay that I've fallen behind on my writing. I promise to get that one up in a few days after my awesome beta has read through it!**

**On the plus side though, I found out this morning I have passed both my social sciences courses YAY! I now have a certificate in social sciences and 60 more points towards my degree! **

**Anyway, I hope you enjoy. As always let me know what you think xxxxxx **


	12. Chapter 12

**Right, first off, apologies for the delay. Im planning a surprise party for my bud Donna and trying to study, stop my kids from killing each other and my husband from trashing the house! Anyhoo, I thought I better update fast before you lot abandon me :(**

**Thank you as always to my awesome beta Magenta who has taken the time to read this while working, studying and writing her own incredible fic "Angel of war" - if your not reading that, WHY NOT? lol!**

**I don't own Twilight.**

**Chapter 12:**

Swan was driving me _insane._ Literally, I cannot think without her voice in my head or closing my eyes without seeing her face.

I cant even shit without wondering what she's doing. There is clearly something seriously wrong with me!

McCarty would say I've been 'flangemerised' or something equally as retarded.

I had practically memorised the ways her lips moved and how her nose scrunched up when she didn't like something. And how her eyes lit up with fire when she was pissed at me which was more often than not.

She consumed my every thought and to be honest it pissed me right off.

I was in the middle of one hell of a wet dream about her when she called to say her heap of shit had broken down and could I give her a lift. My first thought was..What the fuck?

I cant even wank without thinking about her.

I was kinda pissed off that she had interrupted my dream... even though it was about her. Yeah, I know that sounds weird even to me!

What I wouldn't give to tap that ass again. Would she want to? I had no idea if she was even seeing anyone. I prayed not.

The thought of being with anyone else actually made me wanna fuck a dude up! _Clearly I was fucked!_

I gotta admit I was kinda pleased that she had asked me to come get her despite the fact that she had asked McCarty first, but it wasn't his ass that was driving her to work this morning, it was me!

I arrived and saw her sitting in her truck shivering I almost felt bad for being such an ass to her over the phone.

It was a seriously cold morning, I hated this time of the year, I just wanted to stay in bed until I warmed up, maybe a certain Swan could climb in and help me warm up? Screw work, we should have called in sick and stayed in bed. Together.

I honked the horn to let her know I was here and she climbed in the car saying thanks.

I was being an ass I knew this but I was tired as fuck, I had hardly had any sleep the night before thanks to Lauren constantly ringing me begging me to take her back.

She had turned up at the apartment at about 8pm last night begging to come in and for me to tell her what she had done wrong. I did feel bad but I was sticking to my decision, I was not going to be emotionally blackmailed into a relationship that I didn't want to be in. I told her straight that I wasn't in love with her and that she deserved to be with someone who did love her. I broke it to her gently and yeah she was really upset but I know she saw it coming.

How could she have thought things with us were ok? We hardly spoke, we barely slept together. She knew she couldn't delay the inevitable any more.

I thought she had taken it pretty well at first, she had kissed my cheek and told me that she would miss me and left. But then the phone calls and texts started and my brain slowly started frazzling and it had only been a damn week since we had broken up.

Lauren had literally thrown herself at my feet last night and caused the biggest scene ever. She was wailing like a fuckin banshee and hysterically shouting that she loved me. My neighbours had heard the commotion and came out of their apartments to see what the noise was. Which I gotta admit was super embarrassing.

I usually didnt give a fuck what people thought of me but I totally dreaded to think what they thought of Lauren and her meltdown and what_ I_ had done to cause that.

I had dragged her inside where she had wailed some more before telling me she was in love with me and she wanted to have my children and make me the happiest person on the planet!

Clearly she didn't get that just leaving me alone would do the job.

I tried telling her nicely that I wasn't right for her but after 2 hours I was worn out.

She would go from being a crying and upset mess to an angry lunatic. She would screaming at me while slapping my face and chest and then she would go back to being a wailing mess.

Eventually at 2am this morning she finally gave up and left, not before smashing an ornament that my mom gave me of god knows what and a few picture frames.

I was gonna have grief off the neighbours for all the noise there was no doubt about it!

She had then bombarded me with every text message known to man kind.

The first ones were her telling me she loved me and that she forgave me for my cheating, lying ways, then they were angry ones saying she was the best thing I ever had and that without her I was nothing. Then there were the ones that said I was shit in bed and never gave her pleasure... _well I think Swan might beg to differ._

Then they went back to pleading and saying she was sorry and how she loved me no matter what.

In the end I had thrown my phone across the room.

I couldn't even shut the damn thing off as it was my alarm and McCarty never got up on time, it was always me that got us up for work so if I was late we would both be.

She had been ringing non stop all night so I only managed to get a few hours sleep. I finally heard the phone ringing again not long after my alarm went off and I was close to launching it out the fucking window. I was not expecting to see Swan's name flashing on the screen.

Thinking about Lauren and how she had pissed me off was making me tense. I kept gripping the steering wheel in anger.

I didn't really want to talk to Swan, but I'm pretty sure she thought I was pissed at her.

We got to the fire house and got out of the car. As we were walking to the firehouse through the carpark, Swan starts flailing her arms like a retarded seal and almost falls flat on her ass.

I had to chuckle at seeing her like that but instinctively I reached out and grabbed her.

Feeling her in my arms like that turned me on no end, it was like she was meant to be there. Forever.

Im pretty sure she thought the same thing, It was a very cold icy morning, I could see how rapid her breathing was by the condensation coming from her mouth.

She had hold of my forearms and was looking at them while moving one of her fingers up and down my jacket. I called her name twice but she was completely in a world of her own. _Eye fucking my arms no doubt!_

I then had to ruin the fuckin moment by opening my mouth and wondering out loud how she managed to get this fucking job as she couldn't stand on her own two feet.

_Way to go Masen._

We got into the fire house and I met up with Santiago and Whitlock who were talking about Santiago's little boys birthday party this coming weekend, it was gonna be a good day! We did the same thing every year. although this year I had been informed that Swan was to be joining us too. I internally rolled my eyes. Seeing her in her uniform made my dick twitch like hell, so seeing her in something tight and short - well thats what I saw in my head anyway - was likely to give me a heart attack.

Whitlock and Santiago were laughing at something extremely disgusting that McCarty had done the day before.

He apparantly went for his daily crap - yes incredibly disgusting - and managed to lock himself in the bathroom in his own stench. So he texts an S.O.S message to Whitlock saying he needs help urgently and could he come break down the door. The guys found this highly amusing and were still laughing about it.

It was almost as fucked up as Swan falling down the damn pole!

My phone chimed and I pulled it out of my pocket, 3 new texts off Lauren and 17 missed calls. _Jesus Christ woman_. I ignored the call and shoved my phone back into my pocket. It was only 7am, she was persistant, I'll give her that.

She was driving me insane, what the hell was I meant to do? She knew my phone number, knew where I lived and worked and apparently wasn't going to be giving up any time soon.

I needed to fix this and fast, before she went all bunny boiler on me.

Swan entered the room looking kinda flustered and McCarty joked that her heap of shit had broken down. I had to laugh, he called it the beast and it truly was.

I didn't get why she had such an old rust bucket in the first place. She obviously had money, they lived in a really good area in a gorgeous apartment and her sister had the most amazing car. There would be no way in hell I would drive that heap of rust knowing I had the money to get something awesome.

Call me stuck up, I dont care - I wanted a reliable car, not something so old that it would just give up when it got cold.

The sirens started ringing indicating we had our first call of the morning. I flew down the pole and sniggered to myself when I remembered the way Swan had landed on McCarty a few weeks back. That was some funny shit. Even Lieu had laughed about it when he heard what she had done.

I grabbed my turn outs, jacket and helmet and dived into the truck.

"Car fire on 4th Avenue guys" Lieu shouted.

I looked around and saw that Swan had gone slightly green, probably from remembering the last car fire we had in this area.

I braced myself. I hoped this wasn't as bad as the last one we attended.

Luckily it wasnt but the driver was carted off for being a drunk. _Stupid fucking asshole._

I'll never comprehend the stupidity of some people. Its just not worth it. When will these people learn? _When they are dead... or have killed someone_ my mind screamed.

We finished up and headed back to the house, I was stinking. I needed a shower and fast. The rest of the day was good actually, I really enjoyed seeing Swan interact with the guys the way she had. She was arm wrestling with McCarty and actually won, I sensed some foul play but she won none the less.I loved seeing her smile. She was so carefree and there was something even more beautiful about the way she was with them. She would never be like that with me and that realisation was somewhat hard to take.

She would always be wary of me, I got that.

About 4.45pm Lieu called me into his office to fill in some paper work. They were thinking of bringing in a new probie to take Embrys place. Why couldn't we just get an experienced transfer in? I hated newbies... well except Swan of course.

I left his office and headed outside for some fresh air when I heard Swans rather agitated voice. I instantly knew something was up, that tone was usually reserved for giving _me _an ear bashing.

So, I did what any normal person would do... I hid and I fuckin listened.

Swan was arguing with some brute of a guy.

The dude was _huge, _like freakishly big. I felt kinda small in comparison.

Swan was standing completely rigid, I could see her face and she seemed horrified by who ever he was. I had missed some of the conversation but it appeared they were arguing about who had sent who a text message.

"Jake I never sent you any text" Ahh so the beef cake had a name.

Things got kinda heated and I almost stepped out to kick the living shit out of him when I saw him push her against the front of the fire truck. She was obviously uncomfortable with him and pushed him back causing him to yell at her.

She then blew up about him cheating on her and expecting her to take him back after what he had done.

And suddenly it all made sense.

She was pissed at me when she found out I had a girlfriend because she had been cheated on, just like I had cheated on Lauren.

No wonder she was staying the fuck away from me, she was scared of being hurt again.

"Fuck" I muttered to myself while still trying to listen to the conversation.

I was brought out of my thinking by Swan demanding that _Jake_ left.

He then responded by telling her he was going to tell her boss... _our_ boss that she had blown his fucking car up.

_Holy shit, she blew up his car?_

I almost choked when I heard this. But not as much as I did when I heard that if Swan agreed to go out with him he would keep his mouth shut.

I wanted to go out there and smash his big thick head in. How could he blackmail her like that?

Hmm, it would appear that we both had completely insane ex's.

Suddenly I had a thought. Maybe we could help each other? I could get her crazy ex of her back if she got rid of mine?

Im not sure how the fuck it would work, maybe I could pretend to be the boss when he did finally decide to spill the beans.

It needed work but it was certainly a plan none the less.

I looked up again to see pretty boy grabbing Swan by the wrist, she was pissed at this and demanded he let go.

If he didn't I was gonna go out there and shove my boot so far up his ass it would come out of his mouth.

Who the fuck did he think he was touching a woman like that?

No one touches my woman like that... wait.. _WHAT?_

_MY woman?_

Oh this was not good!

Swan finally went back upstairs and the moron left. We had one more call out but Swan was not with us mentally, she was all over the place.

She was fucking up left right and centre.

Lieu had told her to wake up and pay attention but it was clear that her mind was elsewhere.

Probably thinking about what that huge bastard ex of hers had said to her.

I could understand how upset she would be, her job was on the line and she was being blackmailed by him

I needed to talk to her, to let her know what I had heard and let her know I could maybe help IF she helped me in return with the Lauren situation.

I wanted to be able to help her... ok I wanted to just be near her and maybe get one shit hot blow job.

Whoops, did I think that out loud? I cant help it, she has the most perfect lips.

_Shut the fuck up Masen!_

Back at the fire house to work out some of my ... er.. tension I hit the weights room. Even though I knew Swan needed my help I couldn't help but think I could use this to my advantage and get laid again... Im only human right? I can wonder.

Swan walked past still in a daze. I called out to her and saw her eye fucking me while top less on the bench.

I still got to her, that made me smile. I so totally could use this to my advantage.

She was still staring at me, lost in her own world.

"Like what you see?" I smirked at her.

She was totally not listening to me, she was still staring at my chest.

All of a sudden she snapped out of and looked me in the eyes.

"Sorry, you called me?" She asked looking all cute and sexy.

"I think you and me need to have a little chat" I said while sitting up.

I stood and walked towards her, I didn't really want to say this out loud so that everyone could hear me. As much of an ass as I was most of the time, I really didn't want her to lose her job. I wanted to be able to help her.

she looked confused. "A chat? About what?"

"About what your friend Jake had to say about his car"

I saw the blood rush from her face, I could see that she never saw this coming. She recoiled in horror and backed up into the wall.

"You heard that?" She whispered, I could see by the look on her face that she was terrified, tears pooled in her eyes.

"I did" I told her as I walked towards her. I reached out to the side of her and shut the door so no one else could hear and stepped closer to her.

Her breathing was rapid and she was shaking.

"What are you going to do?" She whispered again.

"That depends" I whispered back.

Our chests were touching , I could smell her. I wanted her so badly at that moment, more than I have ever wanted anyone.

I leaned down so that my mouth was next to her ear. I placed my hands on either side of her head and pressed myself against her a bit was no longer frightened and seemed more relaxed. She was clearly enjoying this, she pushed herself into me too, and I heard her take in a sharp breathe of air.

"Maybe if you scratch my back, I'll scratch your back? What do you say?" I whispered seductively to her.

"What do you mean?" She asked me, clearly still wondering what the hell was going on.

"Well, maybe if you help me with my problem, I can help you with yours?"

It seemed a good idea right? She could help me get rid of my pain in the ass ex and I could help her too? I had no idea how I could help her but I could sure as hell try .

As much of a pain in the ass she was, I didn't want her to lose her job. I wouldn't be able to look at her any more. I had to at least try to help her.

**I know its short I'm really sorry but I'm just so busy at the moment, but cos it was so short I'm gonna post the next chapter as well cos I feel bad lol**

**Hope you liked it, let me know what you think? xxx**


	13. Chapter 13

**K so here is the next chapter like I promised, I felt bad for the last one being so short. **

**Hope you like it. Thanks again to the wonderful Magenta.**

**I don't own Twilight x**

**Chapter 13:**

Masen's words had me rooted to the spot. I was mortified. No, beyond mortified.

I knew deep down that what I did to Jake would come back and bite me in the ass but I never once imagined it would do so at work.

I wanted nothing more than to cry, or maybe even throw myself at Masen's feet and beg him not to say anything.

Him pressing me up against the weights room wall was so erotic yet so completely terrifying at the same time.

My career rested in his hands. Once the Lieu got a wiff of this I was a goner.

Despite this happening before I joined the fire department, if this got out my superiors would be horrified. I was meant to be fighting fires not causing them.

Masen had explained that maybe if he helped me I could help him although as of yet I had no idea what he was talking about.

I was so confused, I wanted Jake out of my life but not at the expense of my career that I worked damn hard to get.

I wanted so much to be able to trust Masen but my head was telling me to be wary of him.

He had done nothing to make me think I couldn't trust him but at the same time he hadn't exactly done anything to gain my trust either!

He had insisted that we meet outside of work and discuss our 'problem' where no one else could hear. I agreed obviously. The last thing I wanted was someone over hearing this. It was bad enough that Masen knew, I couldn't risk anyone else finding out. The more people that knew the less likely it was to be kept from Lieu.

I was still incredibly pissed at Jake for thinking that something as low as blackmail would get me to agree to go back to him. I loved my job but I sure as hell was not gonna go back to Jake. I would rather get fired than have him treat me the way he did again.

I couldn't go through that kind of heart ache again.

He acted like he didn't even care that he had broken my heart. He had ripped it out, stamped on it and it had shattered into a million pieces yet here he was trying to make sure that _his_ needs were met.

It wasn't happening, not with me. If he wanted to get laid, he could do it with someone else!

He might have been able to bat his eyelashes at me once and I would go weak in the knees but unbeknownst to him I had actually had better in the bedroom department since him and there was no way I was gonna settle for second best now!

Masen had insisted that we meet at my place after work to discuss how it was best to tackle the situation, he told me that McCarty was gonna be home and I really didn't want him to know about this. And as Rose was working and Alice was on a date with Whitlock it seemed like a good idea for him to come to my place.

I was kinda nervous at him seeing where I lived if Im being honest. Other than Jake I had never had a guy see my bedroom before.. _not_ that I was expecting him to be in my bedroom... Ok Im lying, I totally wanted him in there.. naked.. covered in whipped cream maybe?

_Bella, stop it!_

Thinking like that was only going to get me into trouble.. and hot and bothered!

Whitlock gave me a lift home as he was going straight out to the movies with Alice. I was in a daze the entire way home.

How did I end up being so unlucky? Just when I think things are going ok Jake comes along and ruins all my hard work. Maybe I just wasn't destined to be happy? Who knows!

"So, are you alright?" Whitlock asked me, bringing me out of my musings.

"Yeah, Im good. Just tired"

"Who was that guy earlier?"

"What guy?" I almost snapped back.

_Fuck, he had seen Jake!_

"Easy, Im just asking. The huge guy, he was waiting out front for you. I saw him and asked him if he needed help and he said he was waiting for you to come down"

I internally groaned. Great, now someone else knew he was there for me.

"Ugh, someone from my past, Can you please not tell Alice about this?"

"Er, ok.. but why?" He asked me.

"She will totally freak if she finds out my ex hunted me down. Things ended badly between us and since then she has wanted to chop off his balls and serve him them for dinner"

"Fair enough" Whitlock replied with a chuckle. "Remind me never to get on her bad side"

I laughed along with him, he had a way of making me feel more at ease, I liked that about him.

He dropped me off and told me to tell Alice he was down here waiting. I thanked him and told him I would see him in a few days when we were back on shift.

I trudged into my building and ran almost head on into a young woman who was running out.

"OOOF" I said as the wind was knocked out of me.I dropped my bag and my belongings clattered onto the hard tiled flooring.

"I am soooooooooooo sorry, I was texting and walking and not paying attention and now I've injured you. Are you alright?"

"I'm fine, no injuries" I said as I picked up my things.

In front of me was a very pretty young woman of maybe 23 ish. She had brown hair with blonde highlights pulled back into a pony tail, blue eyes and pink cheeks. Most likely from the embarrasment of plowing straight into me.

"Im so clumsy, I'm really sorry"

"No, seriously Its ok, I'm fine I should have been paying better attention" I replied.

"I'm Jess. I moved in here a few weeks ago" She held her hand out for me to shake.

"I'm Bella, nice to meet you"

She seemed really nice, a bit scatty and boy could she talk but she seemed friendly enough. She told me what apartment number she was in and told me to call over for a chat anytime. I told her the same, it would be nice to have some female company that wasn't my sister or Alice. Not that I didn't love them to pieces but I wanted to be friends with someone that had no connection to the fire house! Jess could be that? I liked her!

I headed up to my apartment to take a shower and get ready for Masen's arrival.

As I walked in Alice was running out.

"Bye Bells, dont wait up" She yelled as she was heading down the hall.

_Alright then. _

I stepped into the shower and let the hot water soothe me. For a split second it actually felt like the warmth of the water could wash away my problems.

I gotta be honest, I was really worried. I knew from Masen wanting to talk here that he wasn't going to be informing Lieu about my... erm activities. He had the chance to tell him back at the fire house so I presumed if he wanted to he would have done it already.

I changed into a pair of yoga pants and a spaghetti strap t shit, I really wanted to don my best underwear and prance around for him but I thought that was unwise considering why he was coming here.

I was a nervous wreck, I really was. Today had seriously been the day from hell, I very much doubted it could get any worse. I prayed that Masen really did want to help me and he wasnt gonna screw me over. I would gladly let him _screw me _again but not screw me over.

_Man, I had it bad!_

The doorbell rang and I almost jumped out of my skin.

I answered it and saw a rather gorgeous looking Masen standing there. He wore a faded black T shirt and very low cut jeans. Any lower and they would be in danger of falling off his hips and landing in a heap on the floor... not that I would mind that at all! I wonder if he has any boxers on under those?

_Damnit!_

"Are you going to invite me in or are you just gonna stand there staring?" Masen smirked at me.

_Shit, busted staring at him again!_

I really was no good at this inconspicuous crap that was for sure!

"Sure, sorry. I was thinking" I stuttered out extremely embarrassed.

"Mmm, I'm sure you were" .

He sauntered past me and brushed up against me as he walked past me sending shivers up my spine.

This man affected me in ways I have only ever read about in books or seen in the movies. I never ever thought a man would make me feel so desired just by looking at me or brushing past me.

He turned and handed me a bottle of wine.

"I didn't know what to bring" He said almost shyly. I loved how he could be so bold yet so shy at the same time.

"Thank you, you didn't have to bring anything" I replied.

I headed into the kitchen to put the wine in the fridge.

I closed the fridge door and turned to find myself face to face with Masen. He was so close I could feel his body heat coming off him. Wow, that T shirt was _extremely_ close fitting, I could see his muscles rippling through it. I wanted to touch it, lick it, _lie_ under it again.

He stepped closer making my breathe get caught in my throat and my heart rate go through the roof. This man was seriously trying to kill me.

I looked up to find him staring at me intently. Those eyes could have melted the polar ice caps... they sure as hell just made my panties spontaneously combust!

I felt myself involuntarily leaning into him, he was just so warm and cosy and dreamy.

I wanted nothing more in that moment to have him kiss me again. Fuck work and my moral ethics. I wanted him, there was no denying it. And from the look in his eyes he felt the same!

_Shit, if I had known this was gonna happen I would have worn better underwear!_

The doorbell ringing scared the living shit out of me!

_What the fuck?_ No one else was meant to be here tonight. Masen stepped back and I instantly missed the contact we had.

I raced through the living room ripping open the front door ready to pounce on who ever it was and tell them to go the fuck away!

Standing there was Jess.

"Hi" She beamed.

Oh now was SO not the time.

I didn't wanna lose a friend before I'd even made one so I was polite and said hi back.

"What can I do for you?" I asked. I remembered my earlier invitation to call by at any time and have a coffee and a chat but I seriously prayed now was not that time. I had one fuck hot bloke in my kitchen ready to bend me over and do unspeakable things to me over the counters, I _really_ did not want a coffee right now.

"Oh well, I was going through my things earlier and I realised that when I bumped into you, you must have dropped your phone and I picked it up by mistake. So here you go"

She handed me back my phone, I hadn't even realised I didn't have it on me.

"Thank you so much" I said sincerely.

Loosing that could have been a right pain, although at least Jake wouldn't have my number anymore if I had to get a new one!

"So, I was wondering if you maybe wanted to go get something to eat? I'm heading out now" Jess asked me.

"Oh thank you, thats really nice. But I have company. Another time?"

"Sure" She said brightly.

Masen behind me cleared his throat and Jess leaned to the side to get a good glimpse of him.

"Wow" She whispered"Your boyfriend is hot!"

"No, er no. hes not my.."

"Ill just leave you to get back to whatever it was you were doing.. Ill see you soon"

And with that she bounced off down the hallway towards the elevator.

"Thank you for returning my phone" I shouted after her.

She just turned and smiled, shouted no problem and off she went.

How embarrassing, the poor girl must have thought she had interupted us doing god knows what.

I closed the door and turned to find Masen staring at me again.

He was holding 2 glasses of wine and smirking that gorgeous panty dropping smirk again.

My stomach rolled and I blushed for like the 100 millionth time since I had met him

"Come, sit down. We need to talk" Masen said as he headed for the sofa.

I really had wanted a replay of what happened in the kitchen, but I guess the moment was gone. I was gutted to say the least.

I sat down next to him and he handed me the glass of wine. I didnt usually drink it but I thought if I was to get through the rest of the night it was probably wise to have one or ten glasses in me.

"So, it would appear you need my help." Masen stated.

"Are you going to tell Lieu?" I asked not looking at him.

"No. But I do need your help with something. I'll keep my mouth shut if you help me out."

Sounded fair.

"Of course, what do you need help with?" I asked.

He took a long sip of his drink and looked at me through those thick gorgeous lashes.

"Lauren". That was all he said.

"Lauren? But I thought you guys broke up?"

I was confused. What could he possibly need my help with her for if they were no longer together?

"We have broken up... But it would seem that Lauren isn't taking no for an answer and is driving me fuckin insane. She's ringing me all the time, coming to my apartment at all hours of the day. Sending me abusive text messages and I'm at my wits end. I really dont want to hurt her but I cant take much more of this"

I thought about this and realised I had no idea what went on in Masen's life outside of work. I was oblivious to it completely.

All my previous thoughts about feeling sorry for Lauren had gone out the window. She was stalking the poor guy.. and he wanted my help.

"Alright so what exactly do you want me to help you with. How am I meant to stop this?"

"I want you to meet her and tell her_ we_ are together and then maybe she will back off"

"WHAT?" I spluttered.

"Are you friggin insane? You expect me to pretend to be your girlfriend in order to make your ex girlfriend leave you alone?"

"Yes" He stated calmly.

"It wont work Masen, for a start we hate each other. She won't ever believe we are together and there's the fact that she thinks im a _lesbian_!"

"Yeah, I was thinking about that. We can just pretend your bisexual instead!" He replied with a wave of the hand.

"Oh Jesus Christ" I put my head in my hands. This was insane.

Im glad he was so blase about my apparent about my sexual preferences. This was mortifying!

"If you do this, I'll make your problem with Jake go away. Lieu will never find out and your job will be safe".

I lifted my head slowly to look at him. He was now perched on the end of the sofa with his elbows resting on his knees and his hands clasped together in between his legs.

"I have not had enough alcohol to be dealing with this right now." I stated

I left him sitting there and headed into the kitchen on a mission to hunt down the alcohol. I found a bottle of tequila, some vodka and more wine.

Three shots of tequila, a shot of vodka and another glass of wine later later I was sat back next to Masen pondering our little predicament. I really should have eaten before downing all this alcohol.

This was one of the most ridiculous things I had ever heard. I didn't want to pretend to be his girlfriend... I wanted to _be_ his girlfriend.

_Ok , where did that come from?_

"So, are you in?" Masen asked me as I drank more of my wine.

The liquid burned my throat but shit it felt head was feeling slightly fuzzy and I wasn't as apprehensive as I was before which was good. I hated being so jittery.

"Do I have a choice?" I replied.

"Of course you do, but I think it would be in your best interest if you agreed. We could help each other and make both of our lives easier."

Alright so he had a point! Plus, I would get to spend more time with him and hopefully get to know him a bit better?

"Fine, I'm in" I said after a few minutes deliberation.

"Good girl. Now where's the tequila?"He smirked at me again almost making me drop my wine glass onto the floor.

I smiled and stood to go into the kitchen to get the bottle.

I turned to find him standing right behind me staring at me again. My heart stuttered and I stepped back only to walk into the counter.

He had the same look on his face as he did before Jess knocked on the door.

"So, we're doing this?" he asked me with a confused look on his face.

"Yeah" I managed to breathe out.

I was staring at his lips, they were delicious. As usual his hair was all over the place, I loved it. I wanted nothing more than to run my fingers through.

"Good, but I think we might need some practice at being convincing" He was moving closer to me so that his chest once again was pressed up against mine. I was really beginning to like this position.

"What did you have in mind?" I stuttered out. I was breatheless and feeling really light headed from being in such close proximity to him, that and the fact that I had drank far too much alcohol. Again.

He pushed into me and put his arms around me so that they were resting on the counter top that was behind me. He leaned down and brushed his nose against mine causing me to gasp out loud. Every single hair on my head was standing up.

I looked up to see him swallowing, his Adam's apple bobbing in his throat.

He ran his nose against mine again and leaned down some more pressing his warm lips to mine.

My stomach flipped a million miles an hour as he did it. It was breathtaking.

It was a chaste kiss with no tongues involved but it was stunning. He pulled away from me and I wanted to scream for him to come back.

Thankfully my prayers were answered, he kissed me again with more passion than before. If possible, his kisses were even more amazing than what I remembered.

His tongue flicked out and touched my lips making me open my mouth for him.

He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me into him. All the feelings of hatred and malice I had ever felt towards him evaporated. I was overcome with feelings of lust.

He slid his hands down my back and massaged my ass, reaching lower he picked me up by the back of my thighs and sat me on the counter top where he stood inbetween my burning legs and carried on kissing me.

I never in a million years expected him to end up kissing me after the day I had but suddenly this day was looking up, in more ways than one.

I could feel Masen's extremely hard dick pressing against my yoga pants.

I wrapped my arms around his head and wound my fingers through his hair.

He produced the most amazing moan as I did this causing me to tremble and if possible become even wetter.

I had never felt this way over a kiss before, it was incredible.

His fingers made their way to the bottom of my shirt and crept up. The skin on skin contact made me gasp into his mouth.

I had forgotten how amazing his touch felt.

He pulled back and looked at me.

"Ok, good practice" He smiled while kissing my forehead.

I didn't want this to stop, I wanted it to go further. There was no way he could get me this horny and not do anything about it.

He must have thought the same as he was suddenly pressing against me again and hungrily attacking my mouth.

I closed my eyes as his lips carressed mine, the feeling was spectacular. One of his hands was behind my head holding him to me and the other was around my waist.

I would gladly die of lack of oxygen as long as I died kissing Masen. He was amazing.

We had been kissing for maybe twenty minutes and I was rather eager to drag him into my bedroom and finish what he had started.

Somehow in all of my thoughts, and lust I never heard the front door open and close.

"Well, well well" Rose said as she dropped her bag on the counter top with a clatter.

_Oh. Come. ON._

I reluctantly pulled away from Masen_. Oh dear god the shame._

"Rose, its not what it looks like" I spluttered out without thinking.

_What? Did I just say that? Of course it was what it looked like! Stupid girl!_

"Really, so Masen here wasn't eating your face just now?"

I think I might have just discovered a new shade of bright red I was so embarrassed.

"Rose.. I ..er. we"

She held her hand up to me "Relax, I dont care what you do just next time can you please do it in your own room?"

"Rosalie. Would you mind keeping this to yourself please? I wouldn't want our working environment to be affected by this." Masen asked her calmly. He was still standing rather close to me and it was affecting my brain cells. I could barely think with him around.

"Sure, I wont tell Emmett, but if you hurt her like that last loser I _will_ be forced to run you over."

"I can assure you I will not do anything to hurt your sister" Masen replied.

"Well, in that case.. as you were" She smiled at me and headed into her bedroom.

"I am so sorry" I whispered. Sorry for getting carried away and sorry for getting caught.

"Its ok, I'm gonna have to dash though, I told McCarty I would help him build a book case or something stupid. I didn't think I would be so long"

_Oh, he had to leave._

"Oh, ok." I replied.

Funnily enough he hadn't mentioned that earlier on. He seemed more than happy to carry this on. And if Rose hadn't interupted then maybe he would have.

"Thank you for agreeing to help, I'll do what I can to get Jake off your back"

"Right"

Of course he had to leave, he was embarrassed about letting himself get carried away and kissing me.

God, for a split second I actually thought he might have been interested in me. But all Masen was interested in was looking out for himself. He wanted to make sure that I actually agreed to his hair brained scheme.

I felt incredibly stupid.

"So, I'll see you at work?" He asked me as he headed for the door.

"Sure, thank you for the wine" I said flatly as he left.

Had he not even noticed that I was upset?

I couldn't believe that all the passion I had felt from that kiss had meant nothing to him. Damn him and damn my feelings.I felt as though I had been used. He had used my emotions against me and now I looked a fool.

I felt so stupid, I'll give it to him, he was a good actor to make me think he could possibly have liked me.

I headed into my bedroom and threw myself on my bed where I cried for the rest of the evening.

**Ohhhh, Im so sorry guys lol. I so had to do it. Was the kiss ok? I haven't done anything remotely citrusy for a while so Im kinda rusty lol!**

**I hope you enjoyed both chapters, I will update as soon as I can :D **

**Let me know what you think as always xxxxx **


	14. Chapter 14

**First of all, I would really like to apologise for how late this chapter is. I've had a really hard few months with studying, essays, the school holidays and going away etc.**

**I had a couple of nasty pms and reviews too which proper put a downer on me. I understand this story is not everyone's cup of tea and that's fine, people are entitled to their opinions but why be a dick about it? Here's a thought... if you don't like this.. don't read it! Its rather simple!**

**I almost stopped writing this because of a few idiots... constructive criticism is great, I want to get better at writing but putting me down because you don't like something ive written is uncalled for. **

**Im sorry if Im being a bitch, I appreciate every single one of you guys... your the reason Im doing this, but Im not about to be made to feel like crap because a few people don't like what they read. You know who you are.**

**Im not fantastic at spelling or grammar, and I know I'm not the best writer in the world - I never claimed to be - but Christ this is FANFICTION. This is meant to be fun, not some childish bitch fest. So please, if you don't like this, just don't read it. I wont be offended, I would rather you didn't if all your going to do is moan anyway.**

**Ok so sorry for the epic A/N I really wanted to say that before I carried on and please don't think this is any way aimed at my regular lovely readers because its not. Your all fantastic! **

**Thank you to my awesome beta Magenta who has encouraged me not to listen to morons and to carry on. If you haven't read her story, Angel of War you really _really_ should!**

**So here we go. I hope you like it .**

**Chapter 14:**

I would totally be lying if I said that Masen's kiss wasn't incredible. It was fantastic, in fact there were no words to adequately describe how amazing it was.

But why did he have to be such an ass? He left me high and dry without an explanation making me think all kinds of things. _Negative things_.

Did he even like me? Did he do this just so I would agree to helping him with his Lauren problem.

There was no denying it, as much as he pissed me off. I had feelings for Masen. I had become soft, I knew this yet there was nothing I could do about it. I was once a strong, confident person but my feelings for Masen had changed me and I really did hate myself for that.

He was quite possibly the hottest, sexiest most irritating person on the planet but I could not help my feelings towards him. I had never felt this way about anyone before, including Jake and I was prepared to spend the rest of my life with him. The intensisity of my feelings for him frightened me.

I had tried so hard to push them to the back of my mind but no matter what I did, my thoughts always ended up back to him.

And now I felt like he had broken my heart. He was never mine for me to feel this way but for some reason him leaving me the way he did and making me feel so unwanted and rejected hurt me more than when Jake had cheated on me.

I couldn't even begin to explain how insane that sounded, I was in love with Jake and he had betrayed my trust. This was not the same. Masen had passionately kissed me and left me saying he had something better to do. Ok so he didn't say that exactly but thats how I felt.

It wasn't the same, so why did I feel so completely shitty and unwanted?

I had woken in the morning with puffy eyes and a sore throat. I hadn't even cried this much over Jake which made the situation even more pathetic.

How was I going to face him after this? I could pretend to have drank too much alcohol and pretend not to remember it?

No, that wouldn't work, If I remembered sleeping with him I would sure a hell remember this.

I wasn't exactly hammered and he knew that so no, that would not work.

I dragged myself out of my pit and into the shower,I caught a wiff of myself and it was not nice in the slightest. I climbed into the shower and sighed, why couldn't things just be easy?

If Masen wanted to act like an ass that was his prerogative, I would help him and in return he could help me get rid of Jake. I was not gonna make a fool of myself anymore though, if he wanted me he could damn well fight for me. And if he didnt, I would know for sure that he wasn't interested in me.

As much as the thought of him not reciprocating my feelings hurt me, I was not about to run the risk of being hurt again, once was bad enough.

I wasn't about to set myself up to be disapointed. Not by him, I was better than that.

I decided that today I was going down to see Jess, who lived on the 3rd floor and invite her out for coffee as I blew her off last night. I hoped she didn't think I was being rude by not going out with her last night, as she saw I was kinda busy... not the kinda busy that I'm sure she thought.

It would be nice to go out with someone that had nothing to do with the fire house, and that didn't know my problems.

I headed down to her floor and knocked on the door to see if she was available later on.

She answered the door and seemed really pleased to see me.

"Bella!" She squeeled. "Come on in, I was just talking about you"

"Oh, you were?"

"Yes, I was telling my friend Angela here that I had met you, come meet her"

I headed into the living room, her apartment was much smaller than ours but it was nice. It was very... lived in.

There was clutter everywhere I looked but it wasn't a dirty place.

She had a cute little tabby cat lying on the window ledge sunbathing.

"This is Angela, Angie this is Bella, the girl I was telling you about"

Angela was a tall, very thin girl of about 22 ish. She had long curly brown hair and was incredibly pretty. Everyone seemed so pretty compared to plain old me.

"Hi, nice to meet you" Angela said, holding her hand out to me.

"You too. Im sorry to intrude, I was just wondering if you might like to go out for coffee later, I feel really bad about blowing you off last night"

"Oh, no dont worry about that. I could see you were busy" Jess said to me with a little smile on her face.

"Yeah, about that sorry. I didn't know he would be there until we were at work yesterday"I replied hoping she wouldn't ask any more.

"So, was that guy your boyfriend?" Jess asked me.

"What guy?" Angela asked.

"This tall gorgeous guy in Bella's last night. No kidding Angie he was beautiful"

"Really? As good looking as my Ben?" She asked giggling.

"Who'se Ben?" I asked butting in.

"Ben is my fiance, he recently proposed to me" The smile on Angela's face told me that she was incredibly loved up. I was jealous and pleased for her at the same time, even though I didn't know her.

"So, you didn't answer the question Bella. Is Mr McHotty your boyfriend?" Jess pressed giggling.

"No, hes not. We work together" I told her.

"But you like him?"She stated.

"He's an ass" I said smiling.

"He's a fine ass" Jess giggled. I had to smile with her. She was totally right, he was a gorgeous ass.

We headed down to the local coffee shop where we spent the next two hours chatting about random useless crap. It was so nice to meet new people and enjoy myself. I hadn't smiled that much in a long time.

I left them chatting and headed back up to the apartment. I really needed to go grocerie shopping, the house was bare. No wonder Alice was so skinny, there was never anything to eat. I felt like I hadn't cooked a decent meal in weeks.

I came home to an empty apartment, yet again.

Since the girls had gotten themselves boyfriends I barely saw them, not that I was jealous or anything... Ok so maybe I was a teeny bit jealous. I felt like I was always on my own up here. Or constantly at work.

I missed having someone so close to just be able to cuddle when I felt a bit down or kiss goodnight to.

Sometimes, a very small part of me wished that I could just forgive Jake and go back to having that but I knew that I would just end up getting hurt again and my sister would never forgive me.

It was Santiago's son's birthday tomorrow too and I hadn't gotten him a present yet, what did boys of his age like? I had no clue.

Alice had left me her car to use while she was out with Jasper as my truck was still bust. As much as I loved that car I knew I was gonna have to trade her in and get something more reliable. I needed something I could trust, especially in the colder months.

Maybe I could go look at buying a new one this weekend? It would give me something to do I suppose.

I headed down to the grocery store and picked up plenty of food, it seemed like no one else bothered to get any food in the house. And I worked most of the time so god knows what the girls did when I wasn't around. They most probably lived on take away food.

I managed to get Santiago's son a Ben 10 game for his DS as I had heard him saying he had bought him one for his birthday, so hopefully he didn't already have the game.

Kids loved computer games right?

I should have just given him 50 dollars and told him to knock himself out!

I got home and turned on the sound system, I was in the mood for some seriously loud music and if the neighbours complained who cares, I wouldn't hear them anyway.

I cranked up the volume and danced around the kitchen like a moron while unpacking all the groceries.

I caught something out of the corner of my eye and almost had heart failure when I saw Masen standing there in my kitchen leaning against the counter. I dropped the jar of peanut butter I was holding and it smashed all over the floor.

What the fuck was he doing here and how did he get in?

"Hi" He said.

"Hi, what are you doing here?" I know I sounded a little shocked but seriously the last place I expected to see him was in my kitchen... again.

"I did knock but your music was too high"

"Right"

I bent down to clean up all the broken glass.

"Here let me help you" Masen said.

He bent down next to me and began picking up bits of the glass too. I was still wondering why he was here but was sort of thrown off by his scent. He smelled like he had just come out of the shower. I could smell shower gel and hair products.

I had to remind myself that as much as I liked him I was not going to be chasing him. If he was interested he would have to do something about it.

I obviously wasn't paying attention as I managed to nick myself with a sharp piece of glass and cut myself.

"Shit" I said as I held my finger out for inspection.

"Here, put it under cold water" Masen told me. He grabbed my hand and pulled me towards the sink.

His touch sent shivers all over me.

"Thank you" I replied sincerely. I hated blood, the smell and sight of it made me want to vomit which as it goes is not a good phobia to have in my occupation.

"Why are you here?" I asked him quietly while looking down into the sink.

"I came to say sorry"

"What for?" I asked.

"I'm sorry about last night, you know.. the kiss and that"

_Oh, so he was sorry that he kissed me. Great_.

"Ok" I said. He must have sensed that I was kinda pissed off.

"No, I'm not sorry I kissed you... well I am... but that wasn't my intention"

"Ok, Im glad we got that cleared up" I snapped.

"No, wait ok that came out wrong. I didn't mean it like that. I'm not sorry I kissed you, It was just not my intention to come here and seduce you like that and for that I apologise. I'm sorry If I made you uncomfortable in any way"

Well that was better than him saying he hadn't really meant to kiss me, it made me feel somewhat brighter but I was still pissed at the fact that he had just left. But I decided to let it go and not let it get to me, I didn't want another argument with him. We were gonna have to work together for the next few weeks the last thing I wanted was for this to be even more uncomfortable that it already was.

"No worries" I replied as I cleaned my bloodied finger up in the sink.

"Do you have any band aids?" He asked me.

"Yeah, in the drawer behind you"

He reached into the drawer and pulled out a band aid and put it on my finger. Why is it that the smallest cuts hurt the most? My finger was stinging. I secretly wondered if it would be considered rude to ask him to kiss it better?

"Is that all you came over for?" I asked him.

I really wanted him to tell me that he came back for me and to finish what he started but I knew that it would never happen and that made my heart sink.

"Yeah... I was in the area" He said while scratching the side of his head.

I cleaned up the rest of the broken jar and its contents and dumped it in the trash.

"Are you going to Santiago's tomorrow?"He asked me.

"I'm not sure. I have things to catch up on so I might pass"

I did really want to go but I didn't want to be in the same vicinity as Masen knowing he was so close yet at the same time so completely untouchable.

I yearned for him and I knew deep down I was setting myself up for disapointment.

"You should come, we do this every year. Its always really good fun".

"I'll see" I replied looking up at him.

"Right well, I had better go. I havent got the kid a present yet, I just wanted to come and explain myself" He was standing with his hands shoved in his pocket rocking back and forth between his toes and heel looking somewhat unsure. I didnt know what to say. I wanted to tell him he had upset me by just leaving but at the same time I also wanted to grab his head and shove it between my legs but I guessed either scenario might cause an argument and decided against it.

"Ok, well thank you. I might see you tomorrow" I replied.

"Do you need a ride? Is your truck working again?"

"No, I'm pretty sure shes officially gone"

I looked up to see him looking at me curiously. That expression looked good on him, even if it was slightly confusing.

"Well, if you need to go car shopping I dont mind coming with you. You know, so you dont get ripped off"

"Er thanks, that would be good"

And with that he left.

I was so fucking transparant, I wanted him..._badly_ and even though I knew he was fucking with my emotions I couldn't help but want him.

Is it so bad to want him to want me?

I finished putting the shopping away and lay on the sofa in the living room and cried again. My God, I was turning into such a pussy and it pissed me off.

It seemed like all I did was cry over this guy. Did he really mean that much to me? I really liked him. Sure, he was an ass 95% of the time but the rest of the time he was sweet and lovely and an incredible kisser.

I had never wanted someone so much in all my life and just the thought of him not liking me the same way back broke my heart.

I fell asleep on the sofa with puffy eyes and a heaving chest.

I woke up to find Rose and Alice fluttering around the house, cleaning.. while in high heels?

What the hell?

"Rose, what are you doing?" I asked, my voice stil thick with sleep.

"Im cleaning. What does it look like?" She snapped back.

"Ok for a start, y_ou _dont clean. And there is no way in hell you would risk ruining a decent pair of shoes by hoovering so what gives?" I said, slowly sitting up.

"Ok... we are having guests over tonight and I wanted the place clean" She replied.

I turned to find Alice also dressed extremely well and wondered who the hell was coming here. Royalty?

"Whatever, I'm going back to bed" I said.

"No, no no missy. I don't think so. You need to take your butch ass in the bathroom, get cleaned up and put something pretty on"

"Hah, no. Im going to bed" I replied heading to my door.

"Isabella Marie Swan". I cringed. Uhoh, full name.

Did she just stamp her foot at me?

"Go get dressed... NOW!"

Yikes, Rose could be scary when she wanted.

"Alright alright. but I'm NOT wearing a dress"

I sauntered off into the bathroom and got in the shower. I let my thoughts as usual wander to Masen. I wondered what he was doing right now, where he was, who he was with. The thought that he might actually be with someone else right this minute made my blood boil but what could I do? He wasn't mine... as much as I wanted him to be, I knew he wasn't and probably would never be.

I sighed and got out of the shower and got dressed. I heard voices and peeked into the living room.

I almost jumped out of my skin when I realised who was in there. Those conniving little bitches.

Oh they were gonna pay for this.

In my living room was Alice, Whitlock, Rose, McCarty and a rather dashing looking Masen.

I didn't know what they were playing at but I was going to play right along.

I headed into Rose's bedroom and flung open her wardrobe doors. If they were dressed to impress then so would I be.

I found a pretty little blue dress and threw it on. I dried and curled my hair and put on some make up. I felt more feminine than I had done in a very long time. I believe the last time I actually made an effort to get dressed up like this was the night I met Masen in that club. Maybe this would remind him of why he was attracted to me in the first place?

I slipped on a pair of black high heels and left the room. Chances are I would fall and break my neck in these death traps but with any luck I could fall into Masen's waiting arms? Wishful thinking? Yeah, totally.

"Rose?" I called as I stepped out of the bedroom. " I hope you dont mind I borrowed one of your dresses, I thought if you were making an effort for our guests I might as well too"

Rose appeared with Alice and they both gasped.

"Oh Bella, you look like a lady. Im so proud of you" Alice gushed hugging me tightly almost cutting off my oxygen supply.

"Thank you. I thought as we had such important people coming over I might as well look the part huh" I said eyeing Rose who was looking down inspecting her nails. She knew that I knew who was in our living room.

"What gives Rose, why is he here?" I asked.

"I don't know what you mean. I just offered to make them all dinner"

"You can't cook" I snapped back.

"No, but I can order take out. They work so hard, they deserve this"

"What about ME? Don't I work hard too? _Why_ dont you do anything like this for me? I'm your sister for christs sake"

"Keep your voice down Bella, don't make them feel unwelcome.

"He IS unwelcome Rose. Do you have any idea how embarrassing this is?"

"But you look really hot, and so does he. So.. go play nice"

Alice was just standing there looking at us like she was watching a Tennis match. Her face was rather funny actually.

Suddenly she gasped and pointed at Rose.

"Your trying to match make aren't you?"

"Rosalie NO" I said completely exasperated. "Masen is NOT interested in me, so please will you stop this before you make me look like an idiot"

"It didn't look that way to me last night when he was sucking your face off"

Alice gasped again.

"You kissed him?" Alice asked me sounding completely shocked. " I thought he was an ass?"

"He IS an ass... a seriously good looking, gorgeous ass but still one none the less. He doesn't like me like that, last night was a mistake" I replied.

"Like the last time?" Rose snorted.

"Oh for the love of God" I said as I walked away from them and into the kitchen.

I needed wine and fast if I was going to make it through this night without making a complete and utter cluster fuck out of myself!

I grabbed my glass and headed into the living room to say hi to the guys. The guys that I worked with, and now practically lived with too.

"Hey guys" I said as I saw them.

They all looked at me as though I had four heads. Masen looked like he was salivating which kinda made me feel smug and the other two just looked confused.

I completely forgot how I was dressed. Shit, only Masen had seen me looking like a lady before.

"Wow Swan, you look like a woman" McCarty said.

"Who knew you had legs girl" Whitlock sniggered as he walked over and hugged me.

"Oh yeah, Rose made me do it" I lied." Although I gotta say, had I known it was only you guys I wouldn't have made such an effort"

McCarty laughed at me and sat on the sofa patting the space next to him.

I looked at Masen who was looking down at my legs. I smirked in his direction and sat on the sofa.

"So, you know that Rose cant cook right?" I asked him

"Yeah, I actually found that out a few weeks back, she cremated my macaroni and cheese". McCarty chuckled while scratching his neck.

"But you came for dinner anyway?" I asked incredulously.

"What can I say, Im a sucker for a pretty face" He smiled at me and I could see how much he adored my sister.

"When did you find out about this?" I asked. I wondered how long I was kept out of the loop for.

"Last night, she mentioned she wanted to do something special for us and then demanded we bring Masen along too"

I looked over at Masen again. He was wearing a pair of jeans and a button down grey shirt. He looked beautiful, his hair was all over the place but that was nothing new. He looked like a model or some shit.

Rose and Alice appeared, handing the boys beer and I went to fill my glass up in the kitchen. I was so pissed at Rose. Who did she think she was messing with my love life this way. Granted I had no love life but it was still _MINE_, and I wanted to keep it that way, it was none of anyones business.

"Swan?"

"Yeah?" I turned to see Masen still with that confused expression on his face. He wanted to watch the wind didn't change and his face got stuck that way.

"Im sorry. About all this. I was only told about it this afternoon or I would have mentioned it to you. They practically forced me to come"

"Thats fine. I was just as clueless as you about it. It would appear that Rose is tring to match make. Which I told he was a ridiculous thing to do"

_Please don't agree with me, please don't agree with me._

"Yeah" he replied.

_Moron!_

"So, I was thinking. For our little plan to work, we need to make it really good, really believable" He said while looking at his feet.

"Right..." I replied.

"We need to pretend to everyone, not just Lauren that we are together"

"No, Masen that is a bad idea". What was he thinking? This was gonna be a nightmare.

This would just infuriate Jake if he found out, it wouldn't make him go away it would make him more determined to piss me off. _Plus_ it would get Rose's hopes up and make her think that we were actually an item. And there was the fact that this would have to end eventually and when it did we would still have to work together. The last thing we needed was this getting in the way of our work too.

"No, I think its a good idea, and I think we should start tomorrow at Santiago's house"

"Your clearly insane" I replied.

He flashed me my favourite grin and leaned into me.

"You look incredible by the way"he whispered and kissed my cheek.

He left me standing there and returned to everyone else in the living room.

What the hell was he doing to me? First he kisses me and makes me feel like he wants me, then he leaves me high and dry, now hes telling me he thinks we should go public with our fake relationship and tells me I look incredible.

I can honestly say I don't think this is going to be a good idea, someone is going to get hurt. Most probably me.

In my head I knew this was crazy and not the right way to go about things. I could get Jake off my back another more logical way and Im sure with the help of a restraining order or maybe a good slap Lauren would leave Masen alone too.

So why was I finding it so hard to tell him no?

**Are you still with me after my bitchfest earlier?**

**What did we think? Is this gonna be a disaster for both of them?**

**Next up, Masens point of view and I promise you wont have to wait too long as Im in the middle of writing it now, so give me a few days and Ill get it off to the best beta in the world!**

**Please let me know your thoughts, I don't mind critism or advise as long as people are not nasty about it. **

**If you do have any ideas or anything drop me a line, Im open to suggestions.**

**Til next time xxxxx**


	15. Chapter 15

**Hiya girlies. First of all I would like to apologise for last weeks rant in my A/N. I was having a bad day but thank you all so much for your kind words and private messages, it really did make me smile and made me realise that I shouldn't give a stuff what a few whingers think.**

**Here is the latest chapter, the next one is already written and has been beta'd so Ill get that up soon. I hope you like it. Im nervous about this chapter as its the first one I've written since taking my wee break. Im hoping you all like it... if not... sorry lol!**

**Thank you to my awesome beta Magenta, Im taking time away from Ben and MotoGP but she knows how much I appreciate her. GO SPIEEESS lol.**

**Right, here we go ...**

**Chapter 15:**

I hadn't meant to kiss her, but shit I couldn't help it. It was never my intention to go there and specifically seduce her but I seriously could not help myself.

I could see the hurt in her eyes as I told her I needed to be somewhere which in fact was a complete lie but I needed to get the hell away from there. I actually felt bad but I needed to get away and fast.

I couldn't think around her, I needed to be away from her before we ended up doing something stupid. As much as I wanted to fuck her senseless again, it was not a good idea, especially as we were working together and now helping each other out.

I knew it was a bad idea to get so close to her. This _brilliant _idea of mine might not have been so brilliant.

I knew in time Lauren would give up and leave me alone and yes the thought of being so close to Swan outside of work was extremely appealing but damn I could see this was going to end badly.

Something in her eyes told me that she liked me more than she was letting on, and truth be told I liked her too but things were too complicated and I didn't wanna fuck up my career and hurt a girl that was in fact a pretty cool chick. So, once I realised what I was doing I backed off.

Whitlock and McCarty had pissed me off by demanding almost that I go back over there to go for some meal that Rose was apparantly making. I tried to get out of it, I even called the fire house to see if they needed an extra pair of hands but no such luck.

I was acting like a stroppy teenager, I knew that but I really didn't wanna be there. I had messed things up by kissing her and I knew she would be pissed at me. So going back over there to have her unleash her fury was really not my idea of a fun night.

I finally reluctantly agreed just to shut those two goons up.

Seeing her in that damn dress almost made me jizz my damn pants. I didn't know what to say, I think she caught me looking at those legs of hers, but shit they looked incredible so how could I not?

She looked better in a dress than I remembered.

While she was talking to McCarty I had caught a glimpse of Rose staring at me with a very curious expression on her face. I just quickly looked away. I felt like a kid caught with my hand in the cookie jar.

I had almost died when she walked in on me and Swan kissing last night. That's what made me back off, if she hadn't walked in I know for sure I would have nailed her making our whole fucked up situation even worse.

I stupidly told Swan I thought that we should make our 'relationship' public at Santiago's sons birthday which I was now regretting. The look on her face confirmed it was insane but something told me Lauren was gonna turn up, and if she did I wanted her to believe I had moved on and hopefully then she would too... _maybe_.

Things were becoming unbearable with Lauren. She was ringing me constantly, it got so bad that I had to have my phone number changed which had really pissed me off. I had had the same number for almost 5 years, everyone had it and now I had to change it just because some chick couldn't take no for an answer.

Things had been going missing in the apartment too, small things at first which I didn't notice like the odd t shirt but then my Ipod had gone missing and so had my calendar with all upcoming dates etc on it including Santiago's party - she knew where he lived as she had been there before.

I was convinced Lauren had broken in - well technically not broken in - one of our spare keys had also gone missing so we had to get the locks changed.

McCarty was so beyond pissed off with her actions that he reported her to the police. I had said I didn't wanna press charges, I felt sorry for the girl, I didn't wanna have her arrested, I had done enough damage breaking her heart the way I did but shit it was becoming more and more intense.

The meal had gone without a hitch, I say meal but it was really a chinese take out but still it was alright.

I had a good time even if Swan barely spoke to me.

I think she was embarrassed to be honest, her sister was trying to match make. That much was clear.

I caught her looking at me a few times and she blushed but we never really spoke.

After the meal, we all sat and watched some crappy chick flick. I could see Swan was uncomfortable between me and McCarty but she didn't say anything. It didn't help that her sister and McCarty were sucking the face off each other right next to us. It might have been dark, and the tv might have been loud but we could still hear that shit.

Alice was nice, I liked her. She was really good for Whitlock who seemed smitten by her. I had never seen him like that with anyone before, I could tell they were really happy together. It made me both jealous and want to puke at the same time. I had never been that way with a girl before so obviously I didn't understand it but I think I might have wanted it? When Lauren wanted to snuggle as she called it, I would pretend to be asleep. Edward Masen did _not_ snuggle dammit. So why after seeing Whitlock and Alice did I want to?

Half way through the film I noticed Swan had stopped figiting and had sort of slumped against me. She had fallen asleep and was snoring lightly. Her hair was all over her face so I couldn't see her. I swiped it back gently and looked down at her. She looked really peaceful when she slept. Her brow was all furrowed like she was concentrating hard on something. Her lips were red and full which reminded me of how she felt when I kissed her the night before. I had to admit, even though I knew it was technically wrong it still felt really good.

I looked up and caught Whitlock looking at me with a smirk on his face. I raised an eyebrow in question and he just shook his head slightly still smirking at me. That boy was way too insightful for his own good.

When the movie finally ended Alice asked me to carry Swan into her bedroom. I gotta admit I was sorta pleased at the prospect of seeing her bedroom but also slightly concerned what she would say when she realised I had been in here. She was still pissed at me for lying to her the night before about having to be there.

I had suggested we just wake her but Rose had said Swan got_ really_ cranky when woken so I reluctantly stood up, picked up Swan who was now snoring with her mouth wide open and carried her through the kitchen and into her room.

I lay her on the bed, pushed her hair out of her face again and took her shoes off. Why women wore these contraptions were beyond me but they did look good. I stroked her head and said good night and stood up to leave but had the shock of my life when I saw Alice standing behind me.

"You like her don't you?" She asked me.

"Course I do" I said while trying not to sound like a frightened little girl. "We work together"

"Thats not what I mean Edward Masen and you know it" She replied with her eye brow arched.

"She's a great girl" I said sincerely. It was true, she was. I got quite uncomfortable with the questioning and made my way across the room to leave.

"She's been really hurt in the past" She stated.

"I know" I replied.

Of course, I didn't know the whole story but I said it anyway, not wanting to look like an insensitive prick.

"She's a great girl, she deserves to be happy"

And with that she left the room.

She was a strange one.

I took one last look at Swan who was lying on her back with her legs bent to one side and one hand up by her face. She was a really attractive girl and despite the attitude problem she could be a really nice person. I pulled her door closed, smiled and headed out to meet the boys where we left to go home.

I woke up after a somewhat unsettled night. I had been dreaming about a barn fire that Swan was trapped in. She was wearing that damn dress and was screaming that she couldn't get out and I couldn't get to her. No one else seemed to be able to see her, they were walking around like it was just a normal fire they were putting out. I was screaming for them to help her but no one else saw me either. It was like I was behind glass or something. I was shouting but no one was doing anything.

I heard her screaming my name but all I could do was stand there and watch her burn. She was crying and clutching her chest. I saw her collapse to the floor with flames all around her. I screamed her name, then McCartys but they didn't hear me.

I jolted awake with sweat beading down my face and chest and panting like a dirty phone call.

It was very rare that I had dreams regaring work and this was certainly the first time I had dreamt about anyone from the fire house and I gotta admit that it freaked me the fuck out. I had no clue what it meant but It got me really worked up and I couldn't get back to sleep after that.

I ended up watching some shit on the tv and doing some on line banking.

I just could not seem to get Swan in that dress out of my head. It both frustrated me and turned me on.

At 6 am I finally fell back asleep on the sofa but even that was restless and I got up even more tired than I was before I went to bed the night before.

Whitlock turned up around midday and we played computer games for a bit but I was distracted and he noticed.

"Whats up man?" He asked me after I lost yet another game on the Xbox.

"Im just tired" I replied.

"Hmm" Came his reply.

I turned to him. "What does _hmmm_ mean?"

"It means, I know when your bullshitting me and you were just bullshitting me"Whitlock gave me one of his looks that made me wanna jump across the sofa and pummel the shit out of him.

"Whatever man, I just didn't sleep too well last night"

"So, your mood has nothing to do with Swan and last night?" He asked.

"Nope" I said slamming my controller down on the coffee table.

"I know you kissed her" He told me. _Fuck._

I knew the guys were gonna find out eventually, hell they were gonna know today but Whitlock knew more was going on and he was right, I couldn't bullshit him.

"Yeah, I did" I said while sitting on the edge of the sofa with my head in my hands.

"Do you like her?" He asked me.

"I think I do ya know, but I don't wanna fuck things up. We work together"

"I think you need to tell me what's been going on, and don't tell me nothing. I might talk slow but I aint stupid"

I knew he was right, and I guessed it would be nice to have someone to talk to about this. I had so many thoughts and so much shit whizzing around my head it would be nice to have someone else's perspective on the whole situation. I was hardly the best judge of things so having Whitlock's advise and influence was a good thing... _right?_

So I told him everything. And despite him being so close to Swan's best friend he didn't judge me. He called me an ass on a few occassions but that was kinda expected after everything I had done and said to the girl.

I even told him about our fake relationship to get Lauren to leave me alone. He was kinda worried about it and tried to talk me out of it but told me that things have a way of working themselves out whatever the fuck that meant.

"So, how are you going to deal with her ex boyfriend?" He asked me.

"I've got no idea, I was hoping that he would think we were together like Lauren and back off but he seems the persistent type. And there is the fact that he might go off the rails and out of spite tell the Lieu about what Swan did to his car so I'm thinking that might not work"

"I cant believe Swan had the balls to burn his car... thats awesome" He chuckled.

"Yeah" I said back. She had obviously been really hurt by his actions, I know she's got a bit of a temper problem, I had seen that myself but I didn't think she was the type to do that.. unless seriously provoked.

"What about we beat him up?"Whitlock suggested with a smile on his face.

"Dude, did you not see the size of him? He's huge, built like a brick shit house huge. He would snap me _and_ you in half"

"Yeah, but we have McCarty - hes also huge" He replied.

"No, he can't know about this. You know how pussy whipped he is, he's bound to fuck up and tell Rose who will probably castrate me for leading her sister on."

"Ok, so no beating him up?" Whitlock asked seemingly upset about not getting to pummel someone.

"No." I said back.

"We'll think of something man, dont worry.

"_We?"_ I asked.

"Sure, I wanna help you. Plus I really like Swan, she's awesome. I don't want that moron fucking up her job because he can't take no for an answer".

"Thanks" I said.

"Right, lets get over to Santiago's house." Whitlock said standing up.

McCarty had left earlier on to go pick Rose up from work and get the boy a present. He had left it to the last minute as usual and would probably get him something stupid. I had managed to get him a radio remote controlled car/truck type thing. I liked that sorta thing when I was his age so with any luck he would like it too. Failing that, I would slip him some cash and he could go get something himself.

We headed over and were greated by Santiago and his wife Melissa. She was maybe 48 ish but she was gorgeous. She had long black hair, gorgeous dark eyes and a figure to die for. She sorta reminded me of Swan in years to come.

McCarty and the girls had yet to arrive so I grabbed myself a beer and gave Melissa the present for Alec.

I parked my ass in one of the chairs in the living room with some of the other guys.

I wasn't really paying attention to their conversation I had my eyes trained on the door. Every time the bell went I jumped, expecting it to be Swan. I was actually giddy at the prospect of her turning up.

And I gotta admit I was slightly excited about the fact that I could now touch her and get away with it - as everyone would be under the impression that we were together.

I hadn't realised my knee was bouncing and I was chewing on my thumb nail until Whitlock sat down next to me.

"Whats up man?" He asked me.

"Nothing. Im good" I replied bullshitting through my teeth.

"Your nervous?"

I rolled my eyes at him. I hated that he knew everything without me even telling him.

"You know, you dont have to do this? I'm sure you can think of another way of getting rid of Lauren." Whitlock stated.

I just glared at him.

"Do you not think I've already thought of everything except having her arrested?" I deadpanned.

"Masen, If I didn't know any better I would say you actually want this to happen" Whitlock smirked.

"Pshh, whatever man. We are helping each other out and thats all" I stated.

"Alright man, but don't say I didn't warn you when this comes crashing down around you."

He stood up and left the room.

He soon changed his tune, he basically implied earlier he understood why I was doing this.

I didn't have any choice... _did I?_

We were friends, and this is what friends did.. they helped each other out when shit got tough. Yes, I was attracted to her and her to me but we were friends and friends helped each other. Whitlock could shut the fuck up.

I looked up to see Alice, Rose, McCarty and Swan standing in the door way.

I hadn't even heard the door bell ring.

Swan was glancing around nervously and when we locked eyes started blushing. I never really did understand why she blushed around me but it sure as hell was cute.

She smiled at me almost shyly and put her head down before following Rose toward Melissa in the kitchen.

I could still see her from where I sat, she had on tight fitted jeans, a really nice blue top and high heels making her legs and ass look incredible.

I gotta admit those heels were really beggining to grow on me, they made her ass look fantastic.

Her hair was up in a scruffy type bun with loose bits dangling down. I'm not sure if the look was intentional. maybe she was running late and just threw it up but it looked good on her. Mind you, I don't think even she realised how pretty she could be. she could wear anything and look good. My dick stirred in agreement.

She turned to look and must have caught me looking as I saw the familiar blush creep up her neck again. I gave her a smug grin and winked causing her to smile back and turn around. I actually liked the reaction I got from her, it was sexy as fuck.

McCarty came over and sat down opposite me with Whitlock in tow.

"Alright guys?" McCarty boomed.

"You took your time, where you been?" I asked. They were meant to be here before us.

"I sorta got held up... Rosie, I.. er. We were..."

I held my hand up before he got any further.

"Never mind, forget I asked" I chuckled while taking a swig from my beer bottle.

Santiago sat down and thanked us all for coming. His son Alec was upstairs playing with some of his friends and would be down soon to open our presents.

"So, I over heard Lieu on the phone the other day, they have a replacement for Embry. Some dude named Soper" Santiago told us.

"I knew it wouldn't take them long. Its not like we are a man down but we could do with the extra hands." McCarty replied.

"Is he on our shift?" I enquired.

"I think so yeah" Santiago replied.

"As long as he pulls his weight I got no problem with him" I said before standing up and excusing myself to go to the bathroom.

The bathroom door was unlocked so I pushed my way in and jumped when Swan squealed.

"Jesus christ Masen, you scared the shit out of me" She yelled holding a hand over her chest.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know anyone was in here, the door wasn't locked." I told her.

"I know, I couldn't get the damn lock to work. It was lucky you didn't barge in a few minutes earlier" She chuckled while drying her hands.

"Hmm, thats a shame" I said, mainly to myself.

"Are you ok?" She asked me, her head titled slightly to the side.

"Yeah, Im good. You?" She had a loose piece of hair sticking up so I moved towards her and pushed it out of the way.

Our chests were touching again. Her chest was rising and falling rapidly indicating that she was nervous.

"Listen, Im sorry about the other night.." I said.

"You already apologised" She breathed, looking at me with those big brown childlike eyes that I was such a sucker for.

I smiled down at her and touched her face with the back of my hand . If I had to pretend to be her boyfriend I might as well get used to touching her.

My dick twitched in my pants, pressing into her stomach. She had to be aware of what she did to me. I knew I wasn't ready to admit it to anyone but no one had ever provoked the reactions that she did in me. It frightened me but also intriuged me. I had never felt so out of control before.

She looked up at me and smiled, just a small smile but it let me know that what I was doing was acceptable.

I was so tempted to lean down and kiss her again but I didn't think cramped into Santiago's small bathroom was the way to go about doing things.

So instead I leaned down to her ear.

"You look lovely Swan" I said, not realising how husky my voice sounded.

"Tha.. Thank you. You smell nice" She replied.

I chuckled, I wasn't expecting that. No one had ever said that to me before. I usually got told I stunk of smoke and to go take a shower.

"Are you sure you want to go ahead with this?" She asked me nervously. She was now looking down and chewing on her bottom lip.

I reached up and pulled her lip from her teeth with my thumb.

"I'm sure, if your sure" I told her. I hadn't realised my thumb was still on her face and how close we were when McCarty barged his way into the bathroom.

The look on his face when he saw us standing together was priceless. He looked shocked, angry and stunned all at the same time. To anyone else it would look like he was either thinking too hard or was severely constipated.

I backed away and looked at Swan who looked just as apprehensive about McCarty's crappy timing.

"Er, you guys ok?" He asked.

"Yeah, fine. Erm, If you boys will excuse me I need to go...that way" She said pointing at the door.

Our fingers touched for the briefest of seconds and she left the bathroom, leaving me standing with McCarty who looked ilke he was trying to solve world hunger in his head.

"I better go too." I moved to make my way out of the room but McCartys huge body moved in front of the door.

"Wanna tell me what the fuck that was all about Masen?" He said sounding really pissed off which made me wonder why. He was boning her sister, not Swan so what would he have against me being close to her?

"That was nothing, we were just talking man" I told him.

"Masen, don't you dare hurt her. I'm dating her sister remember, If you fuck up my relationship cos you cant keep it in your pants I will choke you." He was staring at me and looked quite menacing.

"Whoaa man, I have no intention of hurting anyone. And I wont do anything to harm your relationship. Please, just trust me. I know what I'm doing."

"You better had Masen, otherwise my Rosie will chew you up and spit you out... and don't think I will be stopping her when she does"

I pushed past him and through the party goers , grabbed my coat and stormed out of the back door onto the porch. It was raining out which wasn't unusual.

Why the fuck did everyone think I was such a monster capable of hurting everyone? Shit, I knew I could be an ass but I wasn't down right malicious and it pissed me off that people thought of me that way because I could be a grumpy fucker sometimes.

I know I had fucked up with Lauren but by trying to do right by her I had ended up making things worse.

I had no intention of hurting Swan, she meant too much to me.

_Whoooa that was new._

I had never been the kind of guy to be all lovey dovey with girls. They usually got fucked and that was that. It was usually what both parties wanted so why make it something more?

But with Swan I had this over whelming urge to protect her, touch her and kiss her which was something very new to me.

I wasn't sure what it meant and I wasn't sure whether I liked it or not but I couldn't carry on ignoring it. It was gnawing at my stomach whenever I saw her.

I looked up, rammed my hands into my pockets and sighed out loud. When did my life get so fucking complicated? Why could things not just be simple?

"Am I interrupting?" Came Swan's voice from the back door.

My head snapped round and my eyes met her. I hadn't expected her to be out here in the cold.

"What are you doing out here? Its cold" I said.

"I was looking for you." She almost whispered.

I sat down on the bench on the porch and motioned with my hand for her to sit next to me.

She smiled slightly at me and came to sit down next to me. Our legs were touching and once again I had to remind my self I was going to have to get used to being in such a close proximity to her.

"I wanted to see you were ok. McCarty can be quite protective of me sometimes. I think its because of Rose and my past"

"That's understandable, he's worried about you. But he has no reason to be. I wouldn't intentionally hurt anyone"

"I know that."Swan said.

We sat in silence for a few minutes before I noticed her arms were covered in goose pimples. I had my coat hanging over the arm of the bench so I reached for it and wrapped it around Swan.

"Thank you" She said without looking at me. I left my arm linger around her shoulder for a little longer than probably necessary but what can I say? I liked touching her.

"You know what?" She suddenly asked.

"What?"

"This is the most civil we have been to each other since we met"

She was right, things at work had been tense around each other which was understandable and also a shame. I had gotten to know her somewhat and had recently realised she was actually a really nice girl as well as being seriously fuck hot.

I had been an ass to her in the past. I had acknowledged that and apologised for it... _hadn't I? _

"It would appear Swan that you are correct" I replied.

"You know, I've been thinking. Since we are like 'together' we should probably refer to each other by our first names. What do you think?"

She used her fingers as air quotes when she said the word together which actually made my stomach tighten.

"That's not a bad idea" I mused.

"It's gonna be weird calling you Edward after all this time" She replied.

"You wanna know something? My mother is the only other person I let call me Edward. When anyone else calls me it, it seriously gets on my nerves." It was true, when Lauren did it it was like someone pulling their nails down a chalkboard. It would set my teeth on edge. I had been called Masen for so long now that nothing else really registers.

"Wow, Im honoured" She said giggling.

"So is it still ok to call you Bella?"

"Sure, I'd like that" She smiled at me.

My arm was still around her shoulder so I pulled her nearer me and she rested her head on my arm.

We sat silently for a few more minutes just looking out on the back yard which was in fact huge.

I had seriously turned into a pussy. I was sat here with a woman I considered beautiful looking at flowers I thought were pretty.

When the fuck did I turn into such a woman?

I guess falling and hurting my foot the way I did had really affected me. Maybe those pesky doctors had inplanted me with the 'nice' gene while I was there. Or as Whitlock would probably say, 'they had surgically removed the stick that was up my ass'

_Or maybe your actually turning into a nice person?_ My subconscious sneered.

What the fuck ever.. as if!

Movement from the corner of my eye brought me out of my thoughts. Standing on the far edge of the porch completely dripping wet with one seriously pissed off look on her face was Lauren.

**Ok girls, what do we think? Was it ok? I know in this chapter you will see Masen differently. Hes not _that _bad is he? I loveeeee a bastardward... but I know not everyone does. He's changing.. slowly..lol**

**Anyway leave me some love and let me know what you think. **

**Next chapter will be very soon, and then I wont be updating until after the 4th October. I have a huge ECA ( End of course assessment) to write and its 50% of my total grade so I gotta pull my finger out and make sure I do a good job or the last 4 months will have been for nothing. And hopefully, IF I pass I will have a qualification in counselling and psychotherapy... YAYYY lol.**

**Ok enough waffle... speak to you soon xxxxxx **


	16. Chapter 16

**Hey there pretty ladies:D So, I kinda felt bad for leaving it where I did so I thought I would post you all another chappie before I disapear under a mountain of uni work! As it goes, IF I'm not back in a few weeks, someone come look for me? **

**Thank you as usual to my incredible beta... without her I would be totally screwed... I'm as grammatically correct as my 2 year old!**

**Anyhooo. Lauren's kinda pissed huh? Thank you for the awesome response I got to the last chapter, your reviews made me smile:D I love yas.**

**Here's the next chappie, hope you like it:D**

**Chapter 16**

"Get the fuck away from my boyfriend you bitch" Lauren sneered, her eyes all contorted and her forehead wrinkled in anger.

"He's _NOT_ your boyfriend, freak" I snapped back. Who the fuck did she think she was calling a bitch?

She was stalking closer to me and Masen slowly but rather menacingly. She looked awful. Her hair was all matted, her eyes bloodshot and angry. Her clothes soaking wet and ripped in places.

_What the hell had she been doing? And what the fuck was she doing here?_

"I'm warning you, get away from him or I will _kill you_" She seethed at me. She pointed her bony ugly little finger at me.

I should have been afraid of her but I was too pissed to be. Who the hell did this nut job think she was?

Masen had ended things with her, he had told me she was literally stalking him, I felt nothing but hatred for the girl.

The whole situation between them was so bad that he felt that he_ had_ to come to me to help him because he couldn't deal with her shit himself. That told me that she was unhinged._Severely!_

"Lauren, calm down" Masen said standing up and placing himself between her and me.

"You told me you loved me Edward, you wanted to marry me. What did I do that was so wrong? " She begged him, she was staggering towards him with her arms open pleading with him. She was sobbing hysterically and I wondered if I should slip away and call the police before she had a full on melt down.

"I don't love you Lauren, I'm sorry but I've told you this. You shouldn't be here. _Please_, just go before someone calls the police"

"Its her isn't it? You left me for that skinny little _whore_? Look at the _state_ of her Edward. What does she have that I dont? I could give you everything" She was screeching at an ear piercing level causing me to blanch somewhat.

She was looking daggers at me. _Uhoh_

"_You_" she sneered again. "You stole my boyfriend. I won't let you get away with this" I just rolled my eyes at her.

"She's not a whore Lauren and she's not the reason I ended things with you."

I could see Masen was trying to reason with her and keep calm but his fist was clencing and unclenching by his side indicating to me that he was fighting hard not to lose his temper.

He would never hit her, I knew that. I didn't know very much about Masen, but I knew for sure he would never raise his hands to a woman. But I could see that she was testing his patience. Hell, she was testing mine too!

"Lauren, just go home. You're not wanted here" He told her calmly but with authority. It reminded me of the way a teacher would talk to a small child if they weren't doing as they were told.

She suddenly stopped sobbing, stood upright and slapped Masen with everything she had. His head flew to the side and I saw him snarl in pain. He instinctively reached out and touched his now flaming red cheek.

"Hey" I shouted shooting off the bench past Masen towards her. Why I don't know, I just felt like I should be doing something. I felt this overwhelming urge to protect him even though really he didn't need it. But technically this was about me.. she thought I had stolen her man.. the man she was head over heels in love with.

She lunged at me and grabbed me by my hair making me scream out in pain and pulled as hard as she could. My head was down so there really wasn't much fighting back I could do. She was screaming obscenities at me, calling me a whore and telling me she was going to kill me. I just concentrated on not having my hair ripped out. The pain was excruciating. I had never had my hair pulled before, it was actually incredibly horrible.

I managed to turn myself and kick out at her. Even in my heels I had a pretty good kick on me. My shoe connected with her shin and she let out a high pitched squeal and released my hair.

I stood up, lunged for her and punched her so hard in the face that her head flew backwards and she landed on the decking with an almighty thud.

The whole thing only lasted maybe a minute but it felt so much longer. Masen had grabbed me by the waist and pulled me back away from her.

Lauren sat up, holding her face which was covered in blood and burst into tears.

"You crazy bitch, you stole my boyfriend _and_ broke my nose. I swear you will pay for this"

I tried to wriggle out of Masen's grip and get back over to her. _No one_ threatened me and got away with it. I was gonna fuck that bitch up.

I had seriously never been so angry before. This was not my fight, it had nothing to do with me, but she had made it my fight by attacking me and calling me all those names. So, I shouted at the top of my lungs.

"He's not your boyfriend, He's _MINE _and if you come near him again having a broken nose will be the _least_ of your worries. Now go the fuck away."

The look on her face when I said it was priceless. She was crushed and as much as I hated to admit it I enjoyed seeing her suffer after what she had just done.

Seriously who the fuck does something like that?

I knew that what I said was childish but It just came out. I was praying though that what I had said would do the trick, she was seriously deranged and the last thing I needed was another nut job giving me grief.

I was literally quaking with annoyance.

"Hey hey, calm down" Masen whispered in my ear.

I relaxed some and lent back into him. I hadn't had a good fight in years, in fact I think the last time I had punched someone that hard was when I hit Rose all those years ago?

I gotta admit, it felt seriously good. Ok slightly painful but I felt more in control than I had done in a long time.

Adrenaline was coursing through my veins making me wanna do it again.

Lauren got up, holding her bloody face still and ran off the porch round the side of the house.

I turned to face Masen to apologise and my breathe got caught in my throat when I saw that almost everyone from the party was now standing on the porch watching us. No doubt they had heard my little out burst about Masen and I being 'an item'

"Oh shit" I mumbled putting my head against Masen's chest.

"Dont worry about them. Are you ok?" He asked me.

"Yeah, I'm good. I'm really sorry. I shouldn't have done that"

Chances are now I had made things worse for myself by punching her. So not only would Lieu find out about me being an arsonist he was gonna know I was also assaulting ex girlfriends. _Great._

"Dont worry, we'll sort it" He assured me, stroking my hair that was now sticking up all over the place.

My scalp was hurting from where she had grabbed my hair so hard.

I probably over reacted by hitting her like that but I couldn't help it, she had no right to do what she did. Masen had tried to end things with her amicably, she was the one that was making things difficult. Me retaliating like that was entirely her fault. I acted in self defence and even though she deserved it I still felt awful.

I pulled myself together and moved away from Masen giving him a weak smile.

"I think I'm just gonna go home" I told him,

I had ruined that poor boys birthday party because I had let my temper get the better of me.

I felt utterly ashamed of myself.

"You dont have to go Bella" He whispered to me.

It was the first time he had called me that since the night we had met and it felt really right him saying it.

"I'll see you tomorrow alright?" I told him

Most of the people in the door way had gone back in, only Whitlock. McCarty, Rose, Alice, Melissa and Santaigo were there.

"I'm really sorry about that" I said as I approached them.

"What the hell was that?" Rose asked me, hands on her hips.

"That was Masen's crazy ex girlfriend" I chuckled rubbing the back of my neck.

"No, no that. The whole 'Hes my boyfriend thing'" She asked with her hands on her hips.

I just shook my head and turned to Santiago and his wife.

"I really am so sorry about this"

Santiago just smiled and said it wasn't a problem. His son was upstairs and assured me I hadn't ruined anything.

His wife asked me not to leave and told me no one thought badly of me but I insisted that I wanted to go home.

I headed through the house ignoring the stares from the other party goers and got my bag. I left through the front door and then realised I didn't even bring my damn car. We came in McCarty's car.

"Shit" I said stamping my feet in annoyance.

"Need a ride?" Came Masen's smooth voice.

"I really do" I sighed.

"Come on" He said taking me by the elbow and towards his car.

We got in and he put the radio on. This was the most relaxed I had been around Masen since we had met and it was quite nice.

When he wasn't being a cocky ass he was a nice guy. Dont get me wrong, the sarkyness really is a turn on . Him being so sure of himself and so arrogant is really sexy but I really liked this side of him too.

The last time I had been in a car with him was when my truck had broken down and I couldn't get to work. He had been seriously stressed out and angry but looking over at him now he seemed almost peaceful.

He had a slight smile on his face and was humming along to the Foo Fighters' 'All my life' on the radio.

"You really need to go car shopping" he chuckled.

"Yeah, I do. I just haven't had the time".

"Do you know what you want? Do you have a car in mind?" He asked me.

"No not really, as long as its reliable I don't care what it is."I replied. I loved my truck but she was as reliable as a chocolate tea pot so I knew I needed to cut my losses and just scrap her.

"Well, we have time now. Do you wanna go look at some?" He looked over at me and flashed me his smile. I think he knew I couldn't resist it.

"Sure, why not. I can't keep bumming rides off people all the time. Thank you"

"No worries" He replied tapping his thumbs on the steering wheel to the beat of the music.

I looked out of the window and smiled to myself.

We were silent for a while except for the music. It was a comfortable silence. I kept sneaking glances at him as we drove out the corner of my eye.

"So that's quite the right hook you've got there." He stated.

"Um yeah. Look I'm really sorry about hitting her. I've probably made things worse now" I looked down into my lap. While smacking Lauren had been quite satisfying it certainly was not my intention.

"You dont need to apologise Sw... Bella, she went for you first. Its only natural that you defend yourself"

"Yeah, I know. It's just that we don't need any more problems ya know?"

"Yeah. But you never know this might have done the trick. All we have to do now is figure out how to get that Jake off your back. Right?"

"Do you have anything planned? with Jake?"

"Whitlock suggested we beat him up but I told him that wouldn't work"

"_What_? Whitlock knows?" What the hell Masen?"

I couldn't believe him. Things were going so damn well then he tells me that Whitlock knows about whats going on. _God damnit!_

"Yeah, he knows. I'm really sorry, I just needed someone to talk to. My head was all over the place." He told me.

"Don't you think that mine is too?"

"Come on Swan. Don't be mad. You can talk to him too. I only told him this morning because he knew something was going on."

I folded my arms over my chest. I was a little bit pissed off. In a way I quite liked the fact that he wanted us to act like we were together and have everyone believe it. Now that one person knew it was all fake kinda made me feel like nothing would ever happen between us. It was stupid, I know that. But deep down I think I really wanted to be with Masen.

"I'm not mad. Just next time you decide to do something that involves us both please have the decency to inform me?"

"Done. So car shopping? Do you have a budget?" He asked me while giving me a cheeky smile.

"No, not really. My gramps left me some cash after he died so Ill use that. Its about time I put it to something useful.

He hummed in response.

We went to a few used car dealers in down town Seattle but nothing really caught my eye. They were either too old, too unreliable or downright ugly. As much as I thought my indecisiveness would piss Masen off it didn't. He was happy to advise me and steer me away from the cars that looked like death traps on four wheels.I was tempted a few times to ask him where the real Masen was and when he was coming back. He seemed different... happy almost? I had never seen him like this before.

We finally after 3 hours of searching found my perfect car. I had seen these around but never once considered driving one. It was gorgeous and had my name all over it.

Masen just stood there, one eyebrow raised.

"Swan, that is hideous" He told me.

I playfully shoved his arm and pouted like a girl.

"But she's gorgeous. I shall name her Bertha"

"Now, I know your just joking."He replied raising that eye brow again. It was quite sexy when he did that.

"About the name sure, but not the car, Its _perfect"_

"Its a _MINI_," He shouted.

"Its not just any Mini, Masen. Its _MY_ mini" I smiled at him while the guy in charge headed over to us with an arrogant swagger about him.

"Good Afternoon, can I help you?" He said eyeing us both up and down.

"Hi there... Dale" I read his name tag. "I'll take this one please"

"Do you want to see our payment plans?" he asked.

"No thank you Dale, I'll just buy it as it is" I smiled back at him.

"You are aware that this is a $30,000 Dollar car madam?"

"Yes, Im aware of that... I'll pay by card" I smiled at him.

Snobby little bastard probably assumed I wouldn't be able to afford a car of that price.

_There goes your tip, you presumptious shit_ I thought.

"Would you like to have a look inside or maybe test drive it?"

"I'll have a look inside but I dont need to road test her. Thank you" I told him.

He scurried off to his office to retrieve the keys.

I had never driven a new car before, it was gorgeous. The truck was the only car I had ever owned and that was certainly far from brand new. I was giddy.

"Are you sure about this one?" Masen asked me again.

"Yes, I'm sure, its beautiful".

"Fine, if you say so. I wont ask again"

I was walking away with a bright blue Mini Cooper Convertable with two black racing stripes down the hood, silver alloys, built in sat nav and an on board computer.. what the fuck for I dont know but she was gorgeous.

After signing all the neseccary paper work and paying for my new baby we left the dealer. Masen insisted on following me home to make sure I got back in one piece.

He was convinced Doris (_Yes_ I named my car Doris.. So what? ) would conk out on me but she didn't. She held out and was a beauty to drive.

Alice was gonna be so jealous of me, she always wanted one of these but Rose would have ripped into her about getting one. I was used to her taking the piss out of me and my vehicles. Besides I didn't want a bright yellow one that was covered in sun flowers _unlike_ Alice.

We parked up and I sat there inside admiring my pretty new toy. There was a rap on the window and I saw Masen standing outside.

"You gonna sit in there all day?" he asked me.

"Maybe" I smiled.

"I'm hungry, cook me something" he smirked at me.

"I'm sorry, come again?" Did I just hear correctly? Masen wanted me to cook for him? The cheeky little shit.

"I said...I'm. Hungry. Cook. Me. Something"

"I'm not hard of hearing fool, I heard you" I said getting out of my car." I think you should cook for me" I said stubbornly.

"Hah, no. I can't cook. Its that bad, I actually burn water, Come on Swan, everyone at the fire house knows you're an incredible cook. I wanna be able to tell them that you cooked something for me and not them"

"Ahh, so this is about you bragging huh?" I teased.

"That and I'm fucking starving"

I really enjoyed our playful banter, it was really the first time this had happened.

I said goodbye to my car which earned me another eye roll from Masen and we headed upstairs.

"So, what did you want to eat?" I asked him as we were in the elevator.

"I'm thinking pasta, or chicken or fish. Hell I don't know. I'm that hungry I could eat a cow right now" I laughed at him.

I really loved this side of him, it made him all the more likeable. Although having him being moody and irritable was actually really a turn on.

He followed me down the corridor to my apartment where I fumbled to find my keys.

"Hey Bells"

I turned to see Jessica in the hallway.

"Hi Jess, how are you?" I asked her.

"I'm great, I was just coming up to see if you wanted to hit the gym later on?"

She eyed Masen up and down and raised a suggestive eyebrow at me. I just smiled and ignored it.

"Jess this is Masen. Masen this is my neighbour Jess.

"Hi there" She purred. "I've heard a lot about you."

Masen looked over at me as if to say 'Oh really?' and just smiled at her with his panty dropping smile.

"Its a pleasure to meet you Jess" She giggled at his seductive voice.

"I'll give you a call later on alright Jess and we will sort something out."

"Sure" She said while still looking at Masen. It was true, he had completely dazzled her. I didn't know whether to laugh or act jealous.

Jess walked back down the hall and I wacked Masen on the arm with my bag.

"What?" He said feining innocence.

"You know what." I replied.

About an hour later we had finished our chicken alfredo and Masen was sat on the sofa rubbing his now swollen stomach.

For such a lean guy he surely put some food away. He had probably just eaten his body weight in chicken.

"Swan, you are one hell of a cook woman" He told me, looking back over the sofa at me.

"Is that your way of thanking me?" I retorted.

"Yeah, something like that" He smiled at me.

I had just finished cleaning up when, Rose and McCarty came home.

"Hey love birds whatcha doin?" McCarty sang as he threw himself onto the sofa narrowly missing Masen.

"Swan just cooked me the most amazing meal" Masen said rubbing his belly again.

"Save any for me?" McCarty enquired looking over at me.

"Well, I would have done but it would appear that Masen is eating for two. So no."

"Dude what the fuck man? You ate my share?" McCarty asked Masen sounding genuinely upset. I had to laugh at it.

"You have your own woman, get her to cook for you" Masen snapped at him.

"Aww man, you know Rosie cant cook worth shit" McCarty whined.

"I heard that Jackass" Rose shouted from across the room.

I laughed again and continued wiping the counter when I felt a hand snake round my waist.

"Hey, Im gonna head off and have a shower" Masen practically whispered in my ear.

He was standing right behind me leaning into me. I could feel his heat and breathe on the back of my neck making all my hairs stand up.

"Ok, thank you for coming with me today." I breathed

"No worries" he said back into my hair.

Alice barged through the door making me jump.

"Have you guys seen that gorgeous Mini down in the parking garage?" She gushed. I knew she would be impressed so I just beamed at her.

I looked over at Masen who was rolling his eyes at me. _Again._

"Its mine" I beamed proudly.

"Noooooooooooo" Alice shouted back.

"Yup" I said again.

"Its true, she _made_ me go with her today. I tried to talk her out of it but it appears '_Doris' _was just too hard to resist" Masen replied with his arms folded across his chest leaning on the door frame.

He looked irristable, good enough to eat.

Alice put her hand over her heart and smiled at me.

"Ohh you named her too. I love it"

"Thank you Alice, she's gorgeous. And I didn't force Masen to go today, he offered." I looked over at him and smirked.

"Whatever, you chicks are wierd. Im going home. See you boys at work. Ladies, see you soon."

He looked at me and smiled before leaving the apartment. I couldn't help but watch him leave, his ass was seriously fine in those pants.

"Bella?" Rose called, bringing me out of my Masen induced coma.

"Huh?" I said.

"We _will _be talking later alright?" She raised an eyebrow at me.

Whatever, I just smiled and turned around. I needed to shower and go to bed, I had an early start in the morning.

I was in such a good mood that I smiled all the way through my shower.

When I got out the boys had gone, and so had Rose. She was staying over at McCartys again. Alice was in the living room painting her nails a glorious magenta colour.

"Hey" I said as I sat down next to her.

"Hey, you look happy" She said.

"I'm in a good mood. I had a good day" I told her.

"Even though you broke a crazy girls nose?" She chuckled.

"Ahh crap, I forgot about that" In all honestly I had, since I had such a good time with Masen and buying Doris I really had forgotten the earlier drama with Lauren.

"Did she really threaten to kill you?" Alice asked wide eyed.

"Yeah but I really don't think she means it in the literal sense, she's just pissed off that Masen ended things with her."

"I would be too, if I had lost my boyfriend to someone much prettier" she smirked at me.

"Alice Brandon, bitchiness does not become you." I said pretending to be shocked.

"So your really like 'with' him?" She asked me.

"I guess so, I think we are just seeing how things go" I lied.

"Just be careful alright sweetie. I'm pleased for you but watch your heart this time."

" I will. Thank you".

Alice was my best friend, we had been for years. I felt terrible for lying to her, but I knew she wouldn't understand our arrangement so instead of going through it all again I opted to lie... and shit I felt terrible!

I excused myself and went to bed early. I fell into a restless sleep, dreaming about Masen and a deranged Lauren out for blood. The last thing I remember seeing before I fell to sleep were Masens beautiful green eyes. And for now at least, whether it was real or not. They were _mine_.

I smiled and closed my eyes for the last time that evening.

**Ok girls what do you think? **

**leave me some love xxx **


	17. Chapter 17

**Hey everyone, first of all sorry its a bit later than I anticipated, Uni work has been kicking my arse. My kids were Christened and with Halloween and Bonfire night things have been somewhat manic here. But since my social life just nose dived Ill be able to do more on this.**

**Thank you to my wonderful beta Magenta for pre reading this and being awesome as usual.**

**Here's the latest instalment, I hope you like it:D**

**I don't own anything Twilight... sadly. **

**Chapter 17:**

"No McCarty. I will _not _touch your ass cheek, no matter how much you keep asking me"

I stopped dead in my tracks and looked into the rec room to see McCarty bent over with his bare backside on show and Whitlock with his arms folded looking anywhere _but_ his ass.

"Aww come on man. I swear Roise bit me last night. Just check for me please I can't see" McCarty whined.

"Man, get that thing out of my face" I heard Whitlock yell.

I just shook my head and chuckled and made my way down to the fire trucks to do the usual daily checks. I didn't want to know what my sister and McCarty got up to in the bedroom. The thought made me shudder.

The new guy was due in today ,Soper I think was his name. He was apparently really good at his job but also a bit of a sleeze. Whether it was true or just station gossip I didn't know but I had no desire to get that close to him to find out. I smiled to myself thinking about the one person I was getting really close to; Masen.

I had dreamed about him last night too, I woke up panting and feeling severely turned on so Im guessing it was a really good dream. I blushed at the thought and glanced around to make sure no one had seen me.

I checked all the safety equipment and restocked the truck. It had been a slow morning, we had only been on one call out and we had been here for four hours already The boys were bored and McCarty especially was beginning to get restless. No doubt he would start to get himself into trouble sometime soon. He reminded me of Mike and Jake when they were teenagers, they had to be doing something or they would cause trouble to entertain themselves.

I had no idea where Masen was. I had seen him briefly this morning when we started work and then when we went on our call out to a cute old couples house. The old lady had burned her husbands breakfast and then set fire to the net curtains trying to waft the fire out with a tea towel. He was dressed smartly in a shirt and tie with a v necked sweater over the top while the lady had a white and purple flowery dress with an apron on top. They were an adorable couple.

The husband was screaming obscenities at her in Italian while rubbing his stomach. She just told him to shut up and get back inside which made me laugh. She clearly wore the trousers in that marriage. She pinched Masens cheeks, telling him what a handsome boy he was.

_She wasnt wrong there, that was for sure._

As if he heard my thoughts he flashed me that gorgeous smile before kissing her on the cheek and saying goodbye.

I had smiled all the way back to the fire house gaining some rather odd looks from my colleagues.

Thankfully no one had mentioned the disaster at Santiago's house the day before. I had been dreading that conversation. It was as if nothing had happened and for that I was extremely grateful. What I had done was wrong but it had felt so right. No one mentioned the fact that I had almost knocked out Masen's ex or the fact that I announced we were together. But neither was mentioned.

They did however ridicule me on my choice of car but I just ignored them. My car was stunning and they were just jealous.. well in my head they were anyway. I had never owed a brand new car before so she was now my pride and joy.

I was in too much of a good mood to let them get to me.

I headed back upstairs and called into Lieu to tell him the checks were all done. There was a tall, muscular man in his office. I presumed this to be the new guy.

"Hi there" He smiled. His voice was husky. He was incredibly good looking.

He had broad shoulders, amazing deep blue eyes and short brown hair. I could see a few strands of hair poking above his shirt

"Hi" I replied while still looking at the muscles rippling through his shirt.

"Im James Soper, I just started here" He smiled at me again showing off his perfectly straight white teeth.

"Im Swan" I said back.

"Interesting name" He mused.

"Oh sorry, its Bella but everyone calls me Swan"

"Very pleased to meet you Bella Swan" He said while shaking my hand.

Just then Lieu burst into the office looking flustered.

"Oh Swan, what can I help you with?"

"Nothing sir, I just came to tell you all the checks are done. Do you need anything else?"

"Very good. Actually yes, if you wouldn't mind could you please show James here around?"

"Sure" I smiled back.

"Excellent. James, your previous station has faxed over your details to me so we are good to go. If you need anything dont hesitate to ask. Go find McCarty and get him to sort you out a bunk and a locker upstairs."

"Thank you very much sir" James replied. "Shall we?" He motioned towards the door.

I walked towards it, James placed his hand at the small of my back .

He was very good looking and had an incredible body but he sort of radiated perv if that makes any sense.

"So, Bella. Whats this place like?" He asked me as we headed up to the second floor.

"Its not bad, I've had a great time here."

"And are all the ladies here as lovely as you?" I looked over at him to see he was smirking at me suggestively while looking me up and down. _Yep, the gossip was true... sleeze!_

I felt somewhat uncomfortable, I wasn't used to being spoken to like that, except Masen of course, although that was different.

"Um, no. Im the only female here" I replied.

"I bet the guys just love that huh?" He retorted.

Thankfully we reached the top of the staircase and the guys were sat at the table playing cards.

I cleared my throat and they all looked up including Masen whose eyes bored into mine causing tingles of pleasure down my spine.

"Guys, this is James Soper." I announced.

They all greeted him, shaking his hand and clapping him on the back welcoming him into the fire house.

I excused myself and made my way up to the bathroom on the third floor. James was incredibly good looking but also incredibly sure of himself. Hes the type of person thats good looking but arrogant to go with it. Exactly the type I thought Masen was before I got to know him better.

He had this air of confidence around him that I found disturbing. I could see he would rub people up the wrong way if he wasn't careful.

I wet my face and stared at my reflection in the mirror. I wasn't ugly but I never really considered myself pretty either. My hair was the same dull colour it had always been. Rose and Alice had been wanting to make me over for years but I never let them, maybe now would be a perfect opportunity to let them do it. I never really felt the need to feel feminine before. I was with Jake for so long and he always told me I was most beautiful when I woke up in the morning but he left me for another woman so I cant have been that beautiful to him. After his lies , I believed nothing he had ever said to me, including when he told me he loved me.

Masen told me he was going to deal with Jake but I had no idea how. Jake was incredibly stubborn and pig headed, he was alot like my father in that respect who as it goes still wasn't talking to me properly.

I knew Jake better than anyone, he would not back down, not without a fight anyway. And that worried me. What if he ended up doing something stupid and got someone hurt? If someone got hurt because of me and my foolish past then I would never be able to forgive myself.

My father was pissing me off still, he said he accepted my decisions but when ever I did speak to him he felt the need to critisise my choices. He had said things to Rose on a few occassions too but thankfully she had defended me and told my dad to back off .

This infuriated him further, but they were his issues not mine. This was my life and I was going to live it how I saw fit. I loved my career and the people I worked with and nothing would make me go back to Jake, no matter how much my father wished I would.

A loud rap on the door startled me out of my thoughts. I hadn't realised until I looked up that I had been crying.

"Swan ya in there?" McCarty's muffled voice came.

"Yeah, I'll be right out" I croaked wiping my eyes and face with the palm of my hand.

"You've been in there ages woman, if you've had a dump crack open a window" He yelled back.

I had to chuckle. Most people would consider him disgusting but McCarty never failed to make me smile.

I opened the door and saw him, Masen and Whitlock sat on one of the bunks reading a magazine.

"We were about to send in a search party Swan" Whitlock said without looking up.

"Oh sorry, female things... ya know" I looked at McCarty then at Masen who was lying on his side with one knee up, his brows creased.

I headed to the stairs and down onto the second floor into the rec room. There was no one else around but I could hear voices from downstairs so the boys were probably showing off their toys to the new guy.

"You've been crying" Masen whispered into my hair.

I jumped, not expecting him to have been there.

"Shit" I yelped.

"Sorry" He replied rubbing his nose along the side of my cheek. He was standing behind me, pressed against me his hands on my hips.

"Why were you crying?" He asked.

"I was just being silly, its nothing" I said lowering my head.

"If it was enough to make you cry, its not nothing" Masen said, turning me around by my shoulders so I was now facing him.

I put my head down again but he pushed up back up with his fingers under my chin.

He gazed into my eyes and I almost melted.

"What is it Bella?" He asked. The use of my name sent shivers down me yet again.

"I was just thinking about my dad, and Jake and how things have changed so much ya know. I told you it was silly"

Masen moved his hands off my shoulders and rubbed them down my arms a few times.

"Its not silly at all. Its only natural that you would think about how things used to be. I told you I would sort things and I will".

"Thank you" I said quietly.

He bent down and kissed the tip of my nose and my whole body exploded. That tiny little kiss caused me to almost melt into a puddle of goo on the rec room floor.

"I gotta go see the Lieu, are you ok?" Masen asked me.

"Yeah Im good, thank you"I replied. My heart was pounding like a big bass drum.

He winked at me and headed off down the stairs. I smiled and turned around and saw McCarty and Whitlock sat at the table, they most likely witnessed the entire thing. _Crap _I thought. All I needed was an audience.

I walked over to them and put my hands on the back of one of the chairs.

"Alright guys, lemme hear it." I said knowing full well one of them was dying to say something about what they just saw.

"What?" Whitlock said with a knowing smirk on his face.

"You know full well what, so just get on with it".

"We have nothing to say Swan.. he knows what will happen if he hurts you. As long as your happy then we dont mind" McCarty smiled.

"Oh its nice to know I have your approval _dad_ " I said with a smile. It was like having two over protective brothers.

"Seriously Bella, all we want is for you to be happy and if your happy with Masen then who are we to tell you otherwise or stand in your way." Whitlock said.

"Thank you guys" I told them.

Our relationship might not have been real but at least I knew I could count on thier support and that meant a great deal to me. It was times like this when Masen was so nice and affectionate that it made this whole charade feel worth while.

The rest of the day passed rather boringly. We had a few more call outs where the new guy tried to prove himself. The Lieu thought he was great but I found that he was trying almost too hard to fit in. He was pushing himself and trying to take over where it wasn't needed. I felt almost out of place with him around, like I was a redundant spare part.

I knew he was gonna rub some of the guys up the wrong way and by the looks of it I was right. He was grating on Santiago's nerves as well as Jones's.

Instead of doing the job that was expected of him he was trying to muscle in and take over other peoples.

In instances when there is an emergency, order is needed. We all have set jobs, we all know where we are meant to be what we are supposed to do at what time but by him attempting to take over he was causing havoc so Masen stepped in and told him to do what he was meant to do or stay the hell out of everyone's way.

I smiled at his outburst and carried on manning the water pump. He had this great - sometimes annoying ability to say out loud what people were thinking.

I know as the new guy he wanted to prove he was up to the job but the way he was going he was gonna be left behind sweeping the station floor.

Later that evening all hell broke loose at the station house. Lauren showed up.

She had somehow managed to get past the guys on the ground floor and past Leiu's office without being seen.

We were all sat around the table laughing and joking about McCarty and what my sister had done to his ass. I really did not wanna hear about what they got up to behind closed doors but it turned out it was completely hilarious.

McCarty had bitten my sister in a passionate moment so she did it back, only much harder and it drew blood. And just to prove his point he proceeded to whip his backside to show everyone.

I had no idea how long Lauren had been standing there but no one noticed her. It was only when she spoke silence fell around the room. Even the new guy could sense the huge change in atmosphere and kept quiet.

"Its nice to see your all having fun" She spat. Her eyes were on Masen. He was about to take a bite out of an over sized sandwhich and stopped with his mouth open.

He was sat three chairs round the table from me, he seemed worried about her being there. His eyes kept darting towards her, me and McCarty.

"Lauren, your not meant to be in here" he stated calmly.

I looked up and saw the state I had made to her face. Under both of her eyes big ugly bruises were forming. Her nose was swollen and bruised.

I gotta admit, for a split second at least, I was rather impressed with my handywork.

"I just wanted to let you know that Im not pressing charges for attacking me" She glared right at me, the look on her face was one of pure evil. "But, I wanted _her_ to know that this is not over. _You will pay"_

She had attempted to be scary and mallicious but it was rather hard to take her seriously when she looked like a clown.

"Oh please" I said rolling my eyes. "I didn't attack you, It was one punch and that was because you went for _me_ first".

All eyes were on me, but there was no way I was losing my temper this time. I couldn't afford to do that at work.

Leiu would have a shit fit for a start and then I really would lose my job.

"You _WILL_ pay bitch" She sneered.

All rational thoughts of not losing my temper suddenly flew out of the window. Who did this lunatic think she was? What exactly did I have to pay for? Sure, I slept with Masen when he was still with her but I had no idea about that. That was not my fault.

Seeing her standing there acting like an innocent victim pissed me off so much.

She was the one stalking him, she was the one acting like a deranged lunatic. This had nothing to do with me... ok so maybe I provoked her by telling her he was now seeing me but I refused to be painted the bad party in this entire mess.

I slammed my hands down on the table and stood up sending my chair clattering roughly to the floor behind me

"_What _exactly am I going to be paying for Lauren? You and Masen are done. Finished. I had nothing to do with him ending things. Does the fact that your completely psycho manage to escape your attention? _THATS _the reason Masen ended things with you, not me".

My outburst had rendered everyone silent including Lauren who was standing in the doorway her arms folded over her chest sobbing.

"You... you hit me" She screeched. I looked over at Masen whose eyes were darting back and forth between me and Lauren.

"Yeah, and if you dont fuck off Ill do it again" I yelled back.

"Swan?" _Oh crap! _

Lieu was standing by the rec room doorway with his hands on his hips tapping his left foot. _I was in some deep shit._

"I think you had better leave young lady before I call the authorities" Lieu told Lauren who quickly did as she was told. She scowled at me before dashing down the stairs.

I slumped back against the wall in the kitchen and sighed loudly. Well this wasn't how I expected my day to go.

"Swan, my office" Lieu told me before retreating back to where ever the hell he came from.

If I had known he was lurking around I would never have yelled out that I had hit her. I wonder if that stupid bitch knew he was there and deliberately provoked me?

"Sir" I replied, not that it would have done any use , he was already out of sight.

I stood up and rubbed my hands down my face.

"Crap". I stated out loud.

"Bella, Im sorry. I had no idea she would turn up." Masen told me. His eyes searching mine. How could I possibly blame him for this? He didn't know his lunatic ex would cause yet more trouble for him.

"Its fine. I have a big mouth" I smiled up at him. He seemed anxious. "Dont worry, all will be ok."

_I hoped._

I knocked on Lieu's door and waited to be called into his office. I knew I was in some deep shit. Technically I hadn't been the one to bring shit into work; that was on Lauren but I should have been the bigger party and left well alone.

Even if it did mean looking like a dick infront of the guys. Did I do this because I wanted to save face or because she had pissed me off immensely?

"Come in" He bellowed. I had never been on the receiving end of one of Lieu's blow outs and I was worried. I heard he was a good, calm man unless someone pissed him off and I had , without a doubt pissed him off.

I entered the room and sat down when he motioned for me to.

"Swan, I dont know what the hell that was all about but I do not want to see your outside life being brought into work and broadcast like that again do you understand?"

"Sir. I'm really sorry. She just appeared out of no where and started giving me abuse, I shouldn't have, but I felt I had to defend myself"

"You should have come to me." He told me. I hadn't pissed him off, I realised that now. I had let him down. I felt like shit.

"I know. I apologise sir. It wont happen again." I told him, looking down into my lap.

"Swan, listen. I know people sometimes have issues but I would like to think if you had any problems you would come to me with them. Not go out and play Rocky Balboa."

I smiled at his attempt at a joke.

"I promise you Sir, this all happened outside of work, This is the first time its happened here".

"I understand. Dont let it happen again. And in future if you have a problem then come to me."

"Sir."

"Now, out. And tell McCarty if I see him with his ass out again im gonna stick my foot up it."

I laughed and left his office. I seriously thought I was in for an hour of hell in there. Lieu's a lot more sympathetic than people give him credit for.

I headed back up the stairs and was met by James. He was eating an apple leaning against the doorway to the weights room.

"Where is everyone?" I asked.

"Around. So, you and Masen huh?" He asked smiling at me again. He was a really good looking guy but not my type. I think even if I didn't have this huge thing for Masen I wouldn't find him attractive.

I rubbed the back of my neck and grimaced. "Its.. complicated."

"Aint it always?" He said. "Don't worry, I wont step on anyones toes." He smiled and left the kitchen to find Whitlock.

Well I hadn't expected that off him, it was a relief to know he wouldn't be trying it on with me every five minutes. Maybe I had misread him? Maybe he just really did want to fit in and be liked? He seemed alright, maybe I should just give him the benefit of the doubt and hope he didn't fuck up.

I was just about to go take a shower and chill out when the alarms sounded. I sprung into action darting down the stairs and to the equipment locker. Everyone else did the same thing. They threw on thier turn outs, boots and hats in record time and we all jumped into the truck.

My heart was pumping, the adrenaline flowing, just like it always was when this happened.

"Where to Lieu?" Whitlock shouted.

"Appartment fire, Newton Street" He called back.

We got there in just a few minutes and everyone darted out of the truck expecting to see people all over the place, possibly even a few PD cars but there was no one.

"Lieu, where's the fire? There's no smoke" McCarty said scratching his neck.

"Thank you Captain Obvious I can see that." He bellowed back over the sounds of the siren.

I looked around, he was right, There was nothing obvious happening but Lieu wanted us to check it out just in case.

Masen and I were told to check the apartment while Soper and Whitlock took theback.

We flew up to the second floor and banged on the door. We had to be thorough just in case we missed something.

"Who is it?" Someone called out.

"Seattle Fire Department Ma'am. Is everyone alright?" Masen shouted through the closed door.

"Fire? There's a fire? Freeeeeeed, get your lazy ass up there's a fire. Grab the dog" The lady shouted. She had a thick New York accent.

I had to chuckle. She opened the door and was standing there in her night gown and slippers.

"Ma'am a fire was reported at this address, may we come in and check please?" Masen asked her.

"This address? There's no fire here"

"Do you mind if we come in and take a look please? I asked her politely.

"Of course." She said and stepped aside for us to take a look.

Her husband was sleeping soundly on the sofa snoring like a feight train. It was a good job there was no fire, he was sleeping so deeply it would take a few of us to wake him up.

The apartment was given the all clear and we apologised to the lady for the inconvenience and left.

"All clear boss."Masen told Lieu when we got back downstairs. He took his hat off to reveal his messed up hair. I smiled shyly and looked down hoping he hadn't caught me looking.

He knew he was good looking but it was times like this when he didn't even try that I found him to be even better looking.

"Swan, you coming or are you gonna stand there all night?" Lieu bellowed bring me out of my thinking.

"Sorry" I mumbled and got into the truck and took the only seat left, next to Masen.

I was so close to him I could smell his musky cologne. One of my thighs were touching his, I could practically feel my skin burning through my turn outs.

I hated that one man could have so much power over me, he had such a strong affect on me that he most probably had spoiled it for any other men. There would be no way I could ever be with another man after being with what I considered to be perfection.

I know he had been an ass in the past but I had noticed a huge change in him lately. He was still his cocky sarcastic self but he was a lot more attentive and dare I say it.. caring?

It almost appeared that he cared for me. I really did like the idea but I didn't believe it, I knew I would be setting myself up for disappointment if I thought that and then found out that it was all a show for Lauren's sake.

"What are you thinking?" His low husky voice asked into my hair. I hadnt realised how close he was . My heart started racing.

"Nothing." I whispered back.

"Then why are you blushing? Are you thinking about me... possibly naked?" I looked up at him to see he was smiling at me mischievously.

There was the cocky bastard I had come to ...l_ove? _I knew I had some serious feelings for Masen but I didn't believe it was love. I had been so hurt after Jake I doubted I would be able to love again. I lusted for Masen incredibly badly... But I was pretty sure I wasn't in love with him.

"Damn. Busted." I replied.

"Really?" He asked me seriously,

"No, you moron." I nudged him with my arm pushing him slightly.

"Ahh, but I bet you are now though huh?" he whispered into my hair.

Yes, now I was picturing him lying naked, on top of me kissing and caressing me. Stroking me...

_God damnit._

I blushed and silently cursed Masen for making me think such things while at work. I was incredibly horny as it was without him adding to my frustration.

"See?" He whispered again, His voice did incredible things to my lady parts, It literally reverberated around my body and made me shudder.

Damn him and his sexy voice. Was it getting hot in here?

Thankfully we arrived back at the station and everyone filtered off.

I took my turn outs off and put them down neatly incase we needed them again any time soon.

I jumped in surprise when strong arms circled my waist. It caught me completely off guard and I stumbled over the boots. I hadn't tripped in a while so I wasn't doing too badly.

"Whoaaa. Easy there" Masen said as he pulled me upright again. " I didn't mean to scare you."

"Its ok. I just didn't expect anyone to be down here. I thought you had gone upstairs."

"I wanted to finish our little chat" He smirked.

He was so adorably cheeky when he wanted to be. I really liked the playful, flirtatious side of him.

"And what chat might that be?" I asked innocently. Two could play at this game.

"The one where you were picturing me naked." He told me.

"Well, its been such a long time since I've seen that particular image, Im not sure I remember" I smiled sweetly.

"That can be rectified" He whispered causing me to shudder. _Yes, please_. I thought.

He spun me around and pushed me into the side of the truck where no one could see us.

He was standing so incredibly close to me I thought I might have spontaneously combusted... death by Edward Masen... not a bad way to go.

"So, you admit you want to see me naked again?" He asked while rubbing his nose down my cheek. He had done this many times and everytime it made me quake with desire for him.

"Maybe". I replied.

"Hmm" came his reply.

My body literally jolted into shock when he started kissing my ear lobe. Jesus christ, this man was going to be the death of me.

He slowly moved his kisses down my neck and throat causing me to groan.

His fingers were gripping my hips tightly but the pain was seriously pleasurable. I wanted more than nothing right now than to drag him into the truck and fuck him stupid but Im pretty sure Lieu would actually drop dead if he saw that.

"You smell so fucking good Bella" He groaned. I loved the way my name sounded when he said it.

I could tell he was turned on, proof of that was currently pushing into my left thigh.

I was getting seriously turned on myself. I had this burning ache that would not go away. I had given myself a helping hand if you know what I mean in the shower a few times but the ache only got worse. It was like an itch that needed scratching but I couldnt quite reach it.

The only thing that would cure this burning desire was for me to be implailed on Masen's extremely hard, hard on.

Masen was still sucking my neck and ear when I heard footsteps. Masen being engrossed in what he was doing obviously didnt hear it.

"Masen" I whispered. Nothing

"Edward?" I said again. He had started grinding against me now. which was both super pleasurable but at the same time I was scared incase we got caught by the boss. I had already had one bollocking today I didn't need another one.

"WHOAAAAA Guys. Oh for the love of God I need eye bleach."McCarty wailed.

Masen stopped dead and looked over at McCarty who was rubbing his eyes and looking the other way.

I burst out laughing at the sight of him. Masen also started laughing.

"I'm glad you guys find this funny. That's my womans little sister there. I'm having visions. Ohh the visions." He stalked off in the direction in which he came.

I was still laughing.

"I guess that was our cue to stop. Sorry, I kinda got a bit carried away there." Masen told me as he adjusted his trousers.

"Its ok. I think we may have traumatised McCarty though."

"He'll get over it" Masen replied.

"So, Ill see you later? I asked. I prayed he would say yes. I really wanted to finish what we had started.

"Sure" He said. He bent down and kissed me chastly on the lips before turning and leaving me with severe heart palpitations.

**So what did we think? Im sorry I just ended it like that. I really didn't see another place to end it, if that makes sense.**

**Next up is EPOV. Do you all think Masen is capable of changing or is he only doing this to get Lauren off his back? **

**I love hearing your reviews so leave me some love xxxx **


	18. Chapter 18

**I know I said this would be sooner but... Im slack. Here is the latest chapter for you all. Its a lot shorter than the others but we are coming to an end. I estimate there are probably at the very most 5 chapters left. The one after this is already with my lovely beta Magenta Masen so that one will be posted sometime next week. **

**Im hoping to have this finished in the next month. I have a huge psychology course coming up in March that I need to concentrate on so my mission is to get this finished as ive been really slack with it lately,**

**Thank you all for your lovely reviews, and for sticking with me. I love you all so much:D**

**I hope you like it, I apologise for the shortness but I think you agree its necessary. **

**Here we go...**

**Epov.**

Over the last few weeks I had been doing pretty much anything possible to get close enough to Swan to be able to touch her. I wanted to grab her hair and bury my face in her neck.

I looked forward to coming to work to see her, and when we weren't at work I was texting her or calling her to see how she was doing. I was officially fucked!

Of course I used the excuse of checking to see if that hideous little car of her's had broken down. There was no way in hell I was admitting my feelings, it was far too soon for all that shit. Especially when I didn't know what the hell was going on with them.

I was torn when I told her I would go car shopping with her, in a way I wanted her to get a new one as the old heap of shit dropped dead on her as I predicted, but then in another way I wanted to be able to pick her up every morning for work and spend more time with her. As I said... fucked.

I really enjoyed being in her company which was completely new to me. With the exception of that nut job Lauren no one had ever been close to me. Lauren _thought_ she knew me but she knew what I _wanted_ her to know and nothing more, where as with Swan I found myself wanting to talk to her about my past, my family and my future.

I was telling myself that we were only doing this to get Lauren off both of our backs but if that was the case why was I kissing her when no one else was around? Surely that was defeating the whole point of this stupid game we were playing?

We wanted Lauren and the guys to think we were together so she would give up, but then why was I pulling her to one side just to be close to her?

I had no idea what was going on in my head or hers. I knew she was attracted to me, that much was obvious every time I touched her or I saw her blush pink which was really fucking cute. But I knew a girl like her would have no real interest in me.

One of my many one night stands had told me once that I was an incredible lay but I was lousy boyfriend material and I had gone and proved that with Lauren so there was no way in hell a good girl like Swan would want to be with me.

This pissed me off in a way, but I was unsure why. I didn't wanna be with her... we were doing this to help each other out right? Yeah thats what I was trying to tell myself but my stupid black heart was betraying me by doing weird shit when ever she was around.

The more I thought about shit the more my head hurt. After seeing the new guy Soper flirting with her I was so incredibly pissed off I wanted to smash the mother fuckers face in. He was slimy and made my blood boil.

Whitlock had calmed me down and told me that clearly Swan wasn't interested in him by the way she was looking at him but that did nothing to stop me grabbing her in the rec room after seeing she had been crying upstairs and just being near her.

I had never felt so possessive about another person before but I kept telling myself that Swan just needed my help to steer clear of the fuckwits in the world.

Yeah, that's all I was doing. She had a bad track record when it came to guys so I was only trying to stop her making the same mistake again. _Right? _

I lay on my bed staring at my phone for about 10 minutes. I had text Swan to see what she was doing and she hadn't replied yet. I was getting all mother fucking angsty about her not replying. I was tempted to ring her to find out if she was alright but she beat me to it.

I let the phone ring a few times before I picked it up, I didn't want her thinking I was keeping tabs on her or being desperate by waiting by the phone.

"Hey" I said down the phone.

"_Hey yourself_" I smiled. She was cute when she was on the phone. This had only started recently but we had thought it would be best to keep up apperances and all that.

"Where are you?" I asked her.

"_I just got home. I went to the gym with Jess the girl from downstairs."_

"Nice. So your all hot and sweaty right now?" I asked knowing I would provoke a reaction from her.

I heard her gasp quietly, I could almost hear her blushing and I chuckled.

"Sorry baby I'm just playing with you" I replied without even thinking.

I could have face palmed myself when I realised what I had said.

_Baby? _Fuck? I had never in my life called anyone that before. I was not the terms of endearment kinda guy so I have no idea where that came from.

"_Baby huh? I guess you really are trying to make this look real. Is McCarty with you?" _She asked.

_Ouch_. I guess I deserved that... we were _only_ doing this for show.

"Erm yeah he's around somewhere." I muttered shaking my head at myself. _Fool!_

"_So, what do you plan on doing with your day off?" _She asked.

"Actually I'm working later on, _A_ shift are a man down so I said I would cover. What about you?" I asked her. I was curious but if she told me she had a date I would seriously cut a mother fucker.

"_Apparently I need a new wardrobe so Alice is dragging me shopping." _

I chuckled at the image of Alice dragging Swan reluctantly around the shops kicking and screaming. She didn't seem the shopaholic type where as Alice clearly was.

"What's wrong with your current wardrobe?" I enquired.

"_Nothing, thats exactly my point. She thinks it needs updating. I stopped wearing the skate shit cos she told me I looked like a teenage boy now shes trying to turn me into Bella Ballerina." _

"I think you would look cute in a tutu I gotta say Swan." I rolled onto my back and shoved one hand under my head as I imagined her parading around in front of me in nothing but her bra and a tutu.

"_I would look pathetic but thank you anyway."_

How could this girl not see that even in a black bin bag she would still be by far the most attractive woman on the planet to me.?

"You obviously dont see what I see" I told her.

"_Oh really? And what do you see?_ She asked me quietly.

I thought about what I was gonna say. She was gorgeous but I didn't want her to think I was coming on to her... well maybe I did.

"Well Swan. I did sleep with you so that's gotta say something right?"

"_Oh my god Masen you did not just say that? _She laughed at me.

"Hey, I just paid you a compliment"

"_Are you saying you dont sleep with ugly girls?"_

"Christ woman, your impossible. I'm saying you clearly underestimate yourself. Your much more gorgeous than you give yourself credit for".

Was this chick for real? Did she really think of herself as not attractive? Maybe I should go with her to get her eyes tested or something.

"Oh... well in that case thank you" She breathed.

"No problem" I replied smirking down the phone.

I loved that I had such an impact on her.

Im not big headed or anything - ok so maybe sometimes I can be- but I loved seeing the reaction she had to me touching her or saying things to her. She affected me too but as Im a hard mother fucker I didn't show it as often. I kept things cool, at least I tried to anyway.

We said our goodbyes and I headed out into the living area to find McCarty on the play station shouting at the screen because he was losing.

"Hey man" He said as I sat down.

"You winning?" I asked

"Nope, but Im having fun trying." he grinned at me.

I sat on the sofa next to him and rested my head on the back.

"What you doing later? Wanna grab a few beers? He asked me without even looking up.

"Sorry man no can do Im covering for _A_ shift. They are man down after Lewis 's mother died last week.

"Oh right, yeah. I remember that. How's he doing?"

"The guys said he's ok but its her funeral on Monday so he's staying in Jersey with his family."

"So how are things with you and Swan?" He asked me putting the controller down on the table.

It had to be serious as he had paused his game. _Uh oh. Another McCarty lecture._

"Things are... going good." What the hell was I meant to say? Yeah, even though I'm using her to get my psycho ex Lauren off my back everything is peachy fucking kean?

Somehow I didn't think that would go down too well so I lied.

"You know man, I gotta say this. Ive never seen you like that with a chick before. Is it L..."

I cut him off straight away.

"Man shut up. Swan's a great girl and we have fun but mention the L word again and Ill shove my foot somewhere the sun doesn't shine.

"Ouch.. noted. So you dont ? You know... L her?"

"Did you not just hear what I said?" I stared at him.

"I didn't say the word I mentioned the letter" The smug bastard smiled at me.

"Of course I dont. I really like her obviously but no I dont you know.. love her."

Other than my mother I had never loved anyone before. I know its a different type of love and all that but how was I meant to know what it was if I had never experienced it before?

There were some serious feelings of lust thats for sure. I wanted to fuck the girl 6 ways from Sunday but there was no way I was in love with her. _No way. No how._

"There's nothing wrong with being in love dude, Im falling for Rosie big time."

"There's a difference between me and you McCarty. Your a pussy." I smirked at him and got up.

"Whatever man. When it finally hits you remember this little conversation and how I was right."

I laughed at him and headed for the shower to get ready for work.

12 hours flew and before I knew it I was at home again lying on my bed texting Swan. It had become a new favourite thing of mine to do. I found myself wanting to get to know her, I told her things I hadn't told other feeling was both liberating and scary, I had never let anyone get so close to me before. I was in far too deep, I knew this but there was no backing out.

Swan told me she was being dragged to a spa in the morning tomorrow and asked if I wanted to meet up after.. Did I? Lemme think... fuck yeah I did!

We agreed that I would go and pick her up at 1 as I wouldn't be seen dead in that Mini of hers. She had giggled and called me stupid but all I heard was her laugh. It was seriously one sexy sound, almost as sexy as her saying my name.

I told her to get some sleep and I would see her tomorrow.

I had no idea where to take her, I didn't usually do the dating thing...Was this a date or we're we keeping up appearances? Either way I was gonna take Swan somewhere nice . She deserved to be treated decently after that fuckwit ex of hers had made her life hell.

I had yet another shitty nights sleep. Lauren had been plauging me with phone calls since about 11pm. I had shut my cell off so she started ringing the land line then when I got fed up and ripped it out of the wall she started ringing McCarty's phone.

Things were getting way too much. If she had been a guy I would have knocked her the fuck out for sure already.

I was pleased at the way Swan had handled her at the fire house the other day even if it did result in her getting into trouble.

Lauren had that shit coming. You would think she would have learned after getting smacked in the face but no, she was like a fucking boomerang. She kept coming back. Maybe she was stupid I had no idea but I had imagined she would have given up by now. But no, Im just not that fucking lucky .

I finally fell asleep around 2am and my last thought was of Swan and seeing her smile. Who knew, maybe becoming a pussy was contagious? _Fucking McCarty_.

I went for a run at 7am the next morning. I woke with the most raging boner so after wacking off and still feeling seriously sexually frustrated I got up and decided to take my agression out on the roads.

It didnt work.

At 12 jumped in the shower and got ready to meet Swan, I was early but anxious so I got an early start. We didnt live too far from each other but traffic was most probably murder at that time of the day right? Yeah I wasn't fooling myself either, I just wanted to fucking see her.

I pulled into the garage and parked up the car. I checked my hair - yep, still a fucking disaster and got out the car.

I was nervous and I had no idea why. I didn't usually feel so anxious, especially when it came to women.

This woman had affected me in a way no one had ever done..I felt like I couldn't breathe around her. Not that I would have ever admitted that to the guys though.

My palms were sweaty and my chest was pounding but I made my way up to Swans appartment. The elevator was taking for ever adding to my anxiety.

It finally arrived and I headed up.

What I saw when I stepped out both crushed me and made me so angry I wanted to spit fire.I felt as though I had been punched in the stomach with a lead weight.

There by her door was Swan... in the arms of her ex Jacob. They had their arms wrapped around each other in a loving embrace. He kissed her on the cheek and she told him she loved him.

_WHAT. ?_

The sinking feeling in my stomach actually made me nauseous. She didn't want me, she never had... She wanted him and that made me feel sick.

She looked so happy as she held him and at first she didnt even realise I was there, but as soon as she did she looked horrified.

She had told me in one of our late night chats that she would never take him back no matter what yet here she was with him.

"Edward..."She started.

I didn't even respond, I just backed into the elevator and punched the buttons.

I heard her calling for me before the doors shut but I didnt respond. What the fuck did I have to say to that? I couldn't even think straight.

How could I have been so stupid? Had she used me to get him back?

Hearing her tell him she loved him made me want to scream, or commit murder.

Either way this was not the normal reaction of a person that was helping out a friend.I had never felt so much hate for a person as I did right now. I hated Jacob more than anything for hurting her in the first place and then being right where I _should _have been. And right this second I hated her too. Hated her for making me feel this way.

I got into my car ignoring my name being called and sped away.

I had never felt this much pain in my life. My chest felt like it was caving in and this fucking feeling in my stomach wouldnt go away. Then it hit me, and it hit me hard. All the possessiveness towards her, the dying need to be around her and touch her. The need to kiss her and hold her.. It was now plain as day.

I was in love with Bella Swan... and she had just ripped out my heart and fucking stamped on it.

***Hides behind the sofa***

**Please dont lynch me lol. Ok so are we all glad that he FINALLY admitted his true feelings? Even if it was all really fucked up. **

**As I said the next chapter is already with my beta so it will be up very soon. **

**Leave me some love and let me know what you thought. x **


	19. Chapter 19

**Hey there. I said I would get another update done soon and here it is. I know a few of you werent impressed with how things ended last chapter. I had some amazing reviews for the last chapter, thank you all so much!**

**Thank you to my awesome beta Magenta Masen for reading this. **

**I hope you enjoy. xx**

**BPOV**

My late night conversations with Masen had become more frequent lately,I looked forward to going to bed just to chat for hours with him. It was mostly about random crap but there was the odd occasion that he would say something and my mouth would go all dry, my heart would hammer in my chest and I would burn from the neck up.

He knew just what to say to get me going. I think he enjoyed hearing my reaction to his words.

Hearing him calling me baby almost stunned me into silence, but then I had to ruin it by asking if McCarty was near him. I could get used to being called that, especially by him.

I was dragged through every single shop in Seattle on Friday. I wore sneakers especially as I knew it was going to be one hell of a day. Alice of course scoffed when she saw I was wearing jeans but I refused to go back and get changed. I was going shopping for gods sake, not a damn fashion parade.

As predicted by mid morning my feet were already killing me. I demanded we stopped with the torture and made Alice stop in a coffee shop where we could talk.

She admitted to me that she had fallen for Jasper in a big way and couldn't wait until they got married. I had never heard her being so sure of someone before. It made me smile to see her so happy.

I would never admit it but I was jealous of hers and Whitlock's relationship. I wanted to feel that again. Masen made me feel so wanted and yet so uncertain at the same time.

I knew what we were doing would benefit us both but I was in over my head. I knew deep down that would end up being hurt when this whole messed up situation ended but yet I somehow found myself wanting more. The more I got to know him, the more I wanted him.

I secretly hoped that he felt the same way yet I knew he didn't. I didn't care at this point, I would take him any way and if that meant being like this then so be it. It was better in my opinion than not having him at all. Who knew, maybe I needed my head testing for letting this happen. Maybe I was insane? Maybe I just wanted to be around him.

The world seemed a litte less messed up when we were alone in our little bubble.

He had told me things he hadn't told anyone and for that I was over the moon. I think I hoped it meant more than it actually did. He told me about his past, his father and how he was especially protective of his mother. I really did admire him more at his revelations.

It made me see him in a completely different light. Not a lot of people saw the warm, loving , caring Masen that I saw. They saw what he wanted them to see and that was a hard ass. He had this bravado down to a T, years of practice had perfected the mask I assume. I felt lucky to be able to see what was underneath all the armour, even if it was temporary.

After this evenings conversation we had agreed to meet up the next day. I was giddy with anticipation and secretly thanked the heavens above that Alice had forced me into buying all that sexy underwear that the plan was to seduce him but there was no harm feeling sexy was there?

Alice insisted on dragging me to a spa the following morning to get my lady parts waxed for the occasion. I tried to protest and tell her that I didn't need it but she stood there with her hands on her hips and her eyebrow cocked. A silent look telling me Iwas going and there was nothing I could do about it.

As much as I loved Alice she drove me mad sometimes.

We left the spa after having a wax, massage and manicure at about 11. Alice had insisted we get there at the bright and early time of 9am. I was not amused when she woke me up at 7 telling me we had plenty to get ready for.

On leaving the spa I had the shock of my life when I literally bumped into Jake with a pretty brunette girl.

His face was one of pure shock when he saw it was me he had knocked into.

"Bella?"

"Hey Jake" I replied. I hadn't seen him since the day at the firehouse and felt somewhat uncomfortable. I looked down at the floor and shuffled my feet. _Wow, this was awkward._

Alice just glared at him. If looks could kill he would have dropped dead on the spot. I looked at her and then at him and found myself gazing into familiar eyes. I was still so angry and hurt by what he had done but looking at him like this all vulnerable made me feel sad and sorry for him.

The girl cleared her throat and Jake broke eye contact with me.

"This is Nessie" He told us,I couldn't help notice how his eyes lit up when he spoke her name.

"Im his girlfriend" she said with an eyebrow cocked at me. She didn't look too amused, I wondered if she knew my name and knew our history?

I had to admit there was a twang of pain and maybe jealously when I saw the way he looked a her. There was a time he looked at me like I was the only girl in the world. Despite moving on, I still missed that. I think deep down I always would. He was my first in a lot of ways, nothing could erase that.

We said an awkward goodbye and I sadly watched him leave hand in hand with his new girlfriend. I had no right to be feeling sad, I ended things with him,not the other way around.

Alice assured me that I was just feeling nostalgic and who knows maybe that was it. I was also happy that he had finally moved on too even though it pained me to see. I was over him, I just missed how things were. We were best friends before we became lovers. There was so much history between us it was only natural to be feeling sad about the way things had ended.

I headed home and Alice left to go see Whitlock. At around 12pm there was a knock on my door. I cursed thinking Masen was early and I hadn't even done my hair yet.. I yanked open the door flustered and was blown away to see Jake standing there. How did he even know where I lived?

He had his hands shoved in the pocket of his jeans and was rocking back and forth on the balls of his feet.

"Jake..how did you?" I started angrily. How dare he just show up here uninvited and unannounced?

"I rang your mom and she gave me your address. Bella please, I just really need to talk to I come in?

I was stunned, what did I say to that? I stood aside and reluctantly let him enter. I really didn't want the neighbours hearing about our sordid past on my door step.

"This is gonna have to be quick Im meeting someone in a little while" I snapped at him.

"It wont take long I promise" He assured me

He sat down on the arm of the sofa and looked around. "This is a nice place Bells"

"Thank you. Rose chose it." He smiled warmly at me despite the fact that I was being really blunt and being a complete bitch to him. "What do you want? Im busy."

"Listen, I just wanted to apologise for that day at your work. I had no right turning up there and saying the things I did."

"Thank you for apologising". I said sincerely.

"I really am sorry Bella, I was in a really bad place at the time. I was still really hurt."

I sighed, I knew Jake, better than he knew himself sometimes and I knew he was telling me the truth.

I sat down next to him and smiled sadly at him. I felt the anger slowly start to dissipate and be replaced by hurt. I guess I never really had the chance to get closure after things ended. It ended so badly I never really understood why he did what he did to me.

"Im sorry the way things ended. Truly I am,, I never meant to hurt you. You have to know that when I saw you with her... you broke my heart. I have never felt so much pain Jake."

He hung his head in shame. He looked like a lost little boy, so broken. I felt sorry for him.

"I have no right to ask for your forgiveness Bella but would you please at least think about it."

Could I ever forgive him? Had too much shit happened for everything to be forgotten?

"I dont know. What you did was horrible Jake. Although what I did wasn't much better. I am sorry for what I did to your car.I was angry."

"Eh, its only a car. I broke your heart. Cars can be replaced, your heart cant."

I raised an eye brow and looked at him.

"Since when were you all deep and shit?" I smiled.

"Since when did you swear like a sailor?"He smiled back.

"Try working with the guys I work with 12 hours a day and then try not to curse! Its virtually impossible."

We sat in silence for a minute or two before he spoke.

"So, are you happy" He nudged my knee with his.

" I am, yeah. It took me a long time to find _me_ you know..We were always _'us'_ it took a while to get used to being on my own but yeah, I think I am. Are you?"

He beamed at me, his smile almost melted my heart. I loved that smile, I had done from the day we were kids.

"Yeah, I really am."

"How long have you been with Nessie was it?"

"Yeah, Nessie. Only a month or so but I really like her. She's great."

"I can tell." I playfully nudged him.

"I think I might love her, but I haven't told her yet." He looked up at me and his smile dropped.

"Oh god Bella, Im so sorry I didn't mean to sound so insensitive after you know.." He motioned between us with his hand.

"Nah, its fine. I'm fine. I'm happy for you". I was pleased for him but I was sad at the same time. My feelings for Jake had changed, there was no way in hell that I was in love with him. My love for him died when I found him cheating but I missed the friendship. I would always love him, but I would never be _in_ love with him again.

"Right, I better go if you have a hot date."He teased.

My face burned bright red. "No, its not a date.. I'm just going out with a friend".

He walked to the front door and opened it.

"Uh huh, sure. Listen Bells thank you for listening to me. I really do hope that maybe one day we can be friends again. I know I hurt you and I dont expect you to forgive me I just wanted you to know that I wont be bothering you again. You have my number right? If you ever feel like bothering me once in a while, I would like that".

"Thank you Jake." I told him. It would be nice not having to worry about him hounding me at work again. On the downside My time with Masen had considerably dropped.

He leaned down and hugged me. His smell was familiar and so was his touch but there was nothing there. The fire I felt when Masen touched me lit up my entire body, Jakes didn't do that so I knew I was over him. I wasn't over what he had done but I was over my feelings for him.

"I'll always love you Bella you know that right? You've been my best friend forever. Im so sorry I hurt you." He told me as he hugged me.

"I love you too" I told both knew this was goodbye and the love we had for each other was not the sexual kind.. it was more like an old friend type of love.

I held him tightly for a few minutes and then opened my eyes to see Masen standing by the elevator, a look of murder on his face.

I called his name but he stepped back onto the elevator.

"Shit" I exclaimed. "No, no"

"Bella what is it?"Jake asked me worried.

"My date" I said while sprinting towards the staircase.

I bolted down the flights of stairs and finally made it to the parking lot. Masen was in his car and pulling away. I shouted him a few more times as he drove away but he never looked back.

What the fuck had I just done?

I stood and watched the empty road for a few minutes before heading back into the building.

Jake was standing in the lobby. He looked uncomortable.

"Have I just caused an argument?" He asked,

"No,there was no argument... he left". I said unable to hide my upset.

"Im gonna just go. Are you ok"? He asked me.

"Ill be fine. Thank you. Look after yourself alright?"

He put his hand on my shouder, gave me a sad smile and left the me alone to my thoughts.

I had just royally fucked up. I had no idea what Masen had saw but no doubt he would have interpreted it completely wrong.

When I got back into my apartment I hunted around for my phone and tried to call Masen but he didn't pick up.

I didn't leave a message.

I moped around for the rest of the day hoping Masen would call so I could explain but he never did. I cried myself to sleep that night.

The following day at work dragged, Masen wasn't in so I couldn't talk to him and when I asked McCarty he just shrugged at me. I knew he knew where he was but he wasn't talking.

I tried calling him a few more times that day but his phone went straight to his voicemail. The sound of his voice on his answer machine made me cry. I had lost the one person that meant the world to me.

We attended 4 hoax calls that day but I did my job in a daze like a robot. My brain was stuck on Masen and what he was doing..Where he was and what he was thinking.

I overheard the Lieu saying this was the 9th hoax call of the weekend and that the police were looking into who was waisting our time. They didn't know whether it was the same person or different individuals but they assured us they would get to the bottom of it.

I went home that night and cried on Rose. I told her everything.. She was pissed but understood what we were doing. She was more annoyed at the fact that I had hid this from her.

"He likes you Bella, cant you see? Thats why hes so pissed about seeing you and Jake together." She told me as we downed our 3rd glass of wine.

"Well, he has a funny way of showing it." I said hiccuping.

"He's a guy with a bruised ego, he saw some other guy with his woman, hes bound to be angry"

"But thats just it Rose, Im _not_ his woman. If he wanted to be that way with me he could have told me. He hasnt told me he wants me. Its obvious I like him but I have no idea how he feels about me"

"Maybe you should ask him?"

"Thats kinda hard considering hes not speaking to me right now." I said bluntly

"So go over there. Fight for him. If you want him then go get him." I knew Rose meant well but there was no way in hell I was going over there in my current state. There was no way I could drive, I had drank too much and my head was all over the place.

What if I went over there for him to tell me he wasn't interested . I couldn't take any more rejection.

"No, Ill wait until hes ready to talk to me." I said with a firm nod of the head.

I gave my sister a hug and headed to bed. I was at work again in the morning and was praying that Masen would show up.

He never did.

I worked my three,12 hour shifts with no sign of McCarty or Whitlock were telling me anything. Maybe he was sick? Maybe he was visiting family? Or maybe he was just avoiding me.

My two days off dragged. I hadn't spoken to Masen now for almost 5 days. No texts, no calls no nothing.

I logged onto facebook and checked his account too. I hadn't added him but he had his wall open to everyone, He hadn't been online.

I missed him so fucking much. My heart literally ached without him. I had tried calling a few more times but it always went to voicemail so I gave up.

I never thought it would be the case but I was seriously lost without him. My days were longer, more boring.

I was miserable and cranky and in desperate need of a hug.

I honestly didn't realise what a huge part of my life Masen had become...until he was gone.

**Alrighty then. So it was completely innocent and Masen has gone off on one but hes got a bruised ego right?**

**The next chapter is half way written. Ill try and get that done this week while the bambinos are in school. **

**Thank you so much for sticking with me, I really do appreciate each and every one of you!**

**Leave me some love xx **


	20. Chapter 20

**OK first of all I would light to apologise for the BIGGEST delay ever... Then I would like to explain why. Im so so sorry to all the people messaging me asking for an update.**  
**Ive had a really rough few months, I moved house first all of and was without internet for 8 weeks which almost killed me and made me almost fail my uni course which is all online!**

**Just before we moved I found out that one of my best friends cousins had thrown herself in front of a train and was killed. I was devastated by this, she was only 16 and had SOOO much to live for. I wasnt her friend as such but seeing how her death affected everyone really hit me :(**  
**Then I found out I was pregnant ... again... and morning sickness almost killed me! Thankfully that has now gone and I can function like a human again. Bleughh!**

**Then about a month ago I found out a wonderful friend of mine and her two beautiful sons were killed in a house fire at their home. This again completely devastated me. I know my hormones are all over the place at the moment but it hit me like a brick it was awful :(**

**I know none of this should have stopped me writing but ive been in a pretty shitty place the last few months and I hope you understand why ive not been around. Ive hardly read any fanfic either, Im so behind on everything.**

**Im not doing another uni course now until November so I really want to get this finished before that starts. I promise you all I will NEVER be late like this again.**

**Right, now the formal stuff. Thank you to my amazing beta Amy, shes one of my best friends in the world and I love her to death!**

**And I own nothing.. yada yada yada!**

**So let the fun begin (if you can even remember where it was left off lol)**

**Bella.**

When I was a little girl I dreamed of meeting the man of my dreams, falling in love and living happily ever after. Isn't that what all girls growing up wanted?

I never once imagined that things would end up being so damn complicated.

I might have been a tom boy growing up but I knew that deep down I wanted to be swept off my feet and marry my knight in shining armour.

For a while, I thought my Knight was Jake... but he turned out to be a loser wrapped in tin foil instead.

Without Masen my life felt empty. It had only been 6 days and I ached for him. I felt as though there was a huge hole in my chest and only he could fill it.

I never once felt this way about Jake. My feelings for Jake were luke warm where as for Masen they were burning hot.

I knew my feelings for him were strong, but I had to admit that the intensity of them scared me.

Rose had told me that he was doing the typical 'guy' thing and was nursing his bruised ego but I still couldn't understand why.

I wanted to believe that_ maybe_ I meant more to him than he was letting on but at the same time I felt stupid for expecting too much because I knew I would only end up getting hurt again.

My heart had already been broken once I couldn't let it happen twice.

Masen both fascinated and infuriated me. One minute he was so open with me, telling me things he had never told anyone before,and then the next minute his walls came crashing down and he would shut me out. Just when I thought things were actually starting to change with... _us,_he shuts down on me again making me feel even more fucking confused about things.

I still wasn't one hundred per cent sure what I felt for him. I knew my feelings were intense but I had sworn to myself after Jake I would never fall in love again. I wouldn't expose myself to that kind of hurt .. My heart couldn't take it again.

I couldn't be in love with Masen, because that would be stupid right?

I had been awake pretty much all of last night thinking and wondering what was going on in that boys head and in the end I only ended up confusing myself. I slept for maybe 2 hours before my alarm went off.

I dragged my ass in to the bathroom and stared at myself in the mirror.

My hair was all over the place, my eyes red still from crying the night before. I now had purpleish rings under my eyes letting the whole world know just how rough I felt. I hated that I cried so much over him, I had never done that before. It made me feel weak and needy, two things I swore to myself I would never be.

I showered and dried my hair thinking about Masen still.

How had things gotten like this? I used to be so self assured and confident yet now all I felt was doubt and uncertainty.

I knew I needed to speak to him.. I had no idea what I was going to say but we needed to know where we stood with each other. I was so sick of feeling so unsure. I was afraid of being rejeted by him but at least I would know where I stood. All this crap was driving me insane.

I skipped breakfast, grabbed my bag and phone and headed to my car.

I made it to work pretty early, there was no one else around from my shift when I arrived. I headed up to my locker to get ready for my 24 hour shift.

As I came downstairs I heard the guys from _A_ shift coming up the stairs.

"Morning Swan" Nichols said to me.

"Morning guys, Good shift?" I replied.

"Nah, not really, 3 more fucking hoax calls in 4 hours. This shit is getting stupid." He told me while riffling through the fridge.

"Wow, I thought the cops were dealing with that?" These bogus calls were dangerous and pretty fucking infuriating.

"So they say, but the calls are being made from an untraceable cell phone so they are having issues catching who ever is responsible" Nichols told me.

"Strange thing is, they are only happening in this area, no other fire house has experienced it" I looked up to see Whitlock standing at the top of the stairs leaning against the door frame.

I smiled warmly at him and he nodded his head at me.

"Maybe that means the person doing it is local to this area?" I mused.

"Could be, but the cops need to find this douche soon before someone gets killed while we are busy attending a hoax." Whitlock replied.

Nichols went up to shower and change and left me and Whitlock in the kitchen.

"So, Bella how are you?" He asked me bumping his shoulder into mine.

"Im good." I told him.

I looked up at him and he smiled again.

"Liar" he said winking at me.

"Want me to fix you something to eat" I said to distract him.

"Great deflection Swan. Sure, I'll have whatever your having."

"Oh, Im not hungry." I headed to the fridge and pulled out some bacon.

"You need to eat sweetie"He retorted. "you look like crap!"

"Thanks man" I could always trust him to tell me the truth and tell me I looked like shit.

He left me alone to my thoughts and headed off downstairs to find the rest of the guys.

I did need to eat, I had a 24 hour shift coming I needed to be on top of my game today.

Lieu had pulled me to one side on my last shift and told me to pull my head out of my ass in the nicest possible way. He told me that while I was walking around like a zombie I could be putting people's lives at risk. I was upset, shit I was gutted, but my job was my job. I couldn't risk anyone dying because I was having personal issues. I assured him that today I would be back to myself and leave my baggage at home.

He had slapped me on my back and told me to get my ass out of his office before I got stuck on toilet cleaning duties for the next 6 months.

I zipped around the kitchen in silence making breakfast for the guys. I was always at my calmest while cooking. It was sort of theraputic for me.

I had the bacon and sausage cooking and turned to get the eggs from the fridge and gasped.

Masen was standing leaning against the door frame, pretty much like Whitlock had earlier. He had his arms folded and was watching me intently.

_Fucking hell,_

It had only been 6 days but he looked incredible. His muscles rippled under his black work issue shirt. His hair was its usual messy self and slightly darker as his hair was damp from the rain outside.

He must have seen me oggling him as the corner of his mouth twitched and his eyes burned into mine.

If it were even possible he looked even more sexy. My heart stuttered. I lost the ability to think, breathe even move when he was around.

I could see the muscles in his jaw tense and his adams apple bobbing. _Oh my god how I wanted to suck on that._

"Masen" I whispered out to no one in particular.

He stood up straight and walked towards me slowly causing my stomach to flip flop and make me feel dizzy.

The closer he got the sweatier my palms got and the drier my throat got.

He stopped right in front of me and leaned down. He smelled incredible. Like soap, aftershave and Masen.

"Bella..." He said.

I closed my eyes as I felt his breathe on my face.

I wanted to touch him, feel him. Kiss him and never let him go.

"Bella." He repeated.

"Yes" I somehow managed to breathe out.

"You... look like shit." He pulled back and smirked at me before leaving me standing in the kitchen like a quivvering wreck.

_WHAT. THE. FUCK?_

I dont see or hear from him in almost a week and the first thing he tells me is how fucking terrible I look.? _Oh hell NO!_

That arrogant shit head.

I opened my mouth to shout out something equally as shitty but nothing came out. Not that it would have mattered he was no longer any where to be seen.

I wanted to stand there, stamp my feet and scream like a petulant child. No man had ever infuriated me so much. I wanted to knock that smirk off his pretty little face and then kiss it better.

I carried on making the breakfast in a daze. A black cloud now looming over my morning.

The guys started arriving and saying they were starving and _A_ shift went home. I plated up the food and sat down with the guys who were chatting about what they got up to on their days off.

All I could do was sit there and remember how it felt to be that close to Masen once agin.

What the flying fuck was wrong with me? This man drove me insane in so many ways and that in turn made me even more pissed off.

He sauntered into the room and sat down opposite me.

Just his presence was enough to make my skin flame. I looked up a few times and caught him looking at me. The intensity of his eyes mesmerized me.

I could see the other guys looking at each other curiously, they had no idea what was going on... _Well, me either guys! _

One minute we were all over each other and I was attacking his ex and now he was sat there glaring daggers at me. No wonder they were confused.

At a little after 7 the alarms were sounded. We all stopped what we were doing and dashed down to the fire truck, grabbed out turn outs and headed into the truck.

I had forgotten just how sexy Masen looked in his uniform.

_Shut up Bella. _I mentally scolded myself. I had to do my job and properly. I couldn't allow myself to be distracted by crap.

"Where to Leiu?" Masen shouted over the sirens.

"RTA on 3rd Avenue" Lieu replied.

"This isnt another hoax boss?" McCarty shouted back. I hadn't even seen him in the fire house. I was too caught up in my little bubble.

"We got a live one boys, PD are on location now. Its real so saddle up."

We arrived in minutes to a 3 car pile up. PD and paramedics were already here treating patients. It appeard at first glances that the 3 cars had collided at an intersection.

We sprung into action. One of the victims had to be cut from her car as her legs had been trapped by the crushed metal.

Masen Whitlock and Soper were to cut her from the vehicle while I jumped in the back seat to hold her head still while Jenny the paramedic checked her vital signs.

As soon as I got in the car I realised this wasn't going to be a simple cut out. The woman being treated was heavily pregnant and unconscious.

Jenny was trying to check out the baby while making sure the woman was stable.

"Do you need me to do anything?" I asked her

"Just make sure her head is as still as possible in case of a spinal injury." She told me.

The woman had a huge gash to her forehead and her face was covered in blood. It was probably a good job that she was knocked out, chances are she would have panicked like hell if she had seen the state she was in.

I looked out to the left to see another paramedic working on a teenage boy who was also covered in blood.

This was to me the worst part of the job. I coud deal with fires and possibly rescuing cats from trees but I really did hate car accidents. There was so much carnage.

Jennies voice brought me out of my thoughts.

"Alright, she's coming round. Bella you need to keep her head still, shes likely to panic and start thrashing around"

"Got it" I replied.

Naturally the woman was in a bit of a state, she was more concerned for her unborn childs well being than her own which was amazing. It was so I had no children of my own I couldn't imagine how she was feeling. She was in a mess, she had numerous injuries but she told me that her baby came first.

She told me her name was Megan and this was her first baby. Her husband was flying back from New York and she was heading to the airport to meet him off his plane.

Jenny had told me to keep her talking but she had started lapsing in and out of consciousness.

She had lost a lot of blood and was fading. They needed to get her out of the car and fast.

She had begged me to tell her husband how much she loved him but I insisted she could tell him herself when she got to the hospital.

Finally after what seemed like hours the boys got the roof off the car. Another paramedic stepped in and took over holding Megans neck while she was gently moved onto the spinal board.

Leiu approached me and put his hand on my shoulder.

"Good work Swan" he said before leaving me standing there watch them load her into the ambulance. I never usually got attached to patients as we had so many of them but I really did hope that Megan and her baby were both alright.

We all piled back into the truck and headed back to the house. It was now almost 10.30am.

The boys were chatting about a football game they had watched the day before. McCarty and Masen were in what looked like an in depth conversation.

Whitlock was just looking at me with that 'know it all 'look. I just rolled my eyes at him and sat in silence.

I had just finished cleaning up the breakfast plates when we encountered our first hoax call. An apartment complex was apparantly on fire downtown so we got our shit together and raced down there to find there was no fire.

The police department had gotten there seconds before us and were looking around, possibly for the person responsibe for making the call.

We followed protocol and checked the entire building and nothing was found.

Lieu was seriously pissed and looked like he was about to spit fire himself.

I caught a glimpse of Masen staring at me again but as soon as he saw me looking he looked away and carried on with what he was doing.

I really needed to speak to him but we had already had one hell of a morning. If things quietened down later on I would make my move.

5 hours later and we were still rushed off our feet, We had attended a bonfire that had gotten out of control, another bogus call out and a small kitchen fire.

I couldn't ever remember having a shift like this before. I was tired, dirty and really damn smelly. I just wanted to go have a shower but if things carried on the way they were that wasn't gonna happen any time soon.

About 7pm that evening I finally managed to catch a break and dive in the shower. I was that dirty I was convulsing.. imagine what the guys.. what _Masen_ thought.. _god damn stupid brain! _

I stepped out of the shower feeling much better, got dried, dressed and opened the door smacking straight into a hard chest.

"Ughh' I managed to squeak out.

I had just pummeled straight into Masen's beautiful hard chest. He reached out and steadied me causing pulses of pure lust to course through my body.

"You ok there Swan? You look a bit flushed"

"I er. I was. I ... Sorry" I stuttered out.

Damn my mental block when he was around.

He stepped back, let go of my arm and smirked at me again. Without even saying another word the beautiful arrogant son of a bitch lifted his arms and took his shirt off in front of me. I think my vag groaned in pleasure at the sight of him half naked. It had been a while and damn I had missed the sight.

He just winked at me and slid past me shutting the bathroom door.

What the hell was his problem? What was he playing at? It was almost like he had forgotten everything that had happened between us and gone back to being the prick he was before. I wanted to scream at him.

Without even thinking I burst back into the bathroom. Masen was standing in front of the sink rubbing his hand along his jaw line.

"Swan... Wha?" He started.

"Shut it Masen. What the hell is your problem?"

"What the hell are you talking about?" He glared at me with those piercing eyes and I almost found myself forgetting what I was pissed at.

"You are acting like a complete jackass. Why?"

"This is who I am sweetheart. If you dont like it, you know where the door is" He retorted.

"What happened to you?" I whispered.

He had changed. I knew he was pissed at me about Jake but this hurt.I missed the Masen I was beginning to get to know.

"Nothing happened to me _Bella. _You could say that I finally came to my senses. I saw things for what they really were."

"What does that even mean?" I shouted at him. I was getting upset, I didnt know what he meant. Saw _what_ for what it really was?

"You know exactly what that means Swan." His voice was hard and angry. He sounded nothing like _my_ Masen and that really hurt me. I had never properly seen this side of him before and it almost crushed me. Masen hated me, he had to, it was the only explanation I could come up with.

A big fat tear rolled down my cheek as I looked at him, pleading with him with my eyes. What we had was gone, before it had even started and it was all because I let Jake into my apartment. I couldn't believe he was throwing everything away because of a stupid misunderstanding.

He really was an idiot.

"Please Masen, can we talk?" I said wiping the tears away._ More tears. Great._

He just glared at me but didnt answer me. I jumped when someone started thumping on the door behind me.

"Guys, if you have finished having your little ... whatever it is... the Lieu wants to speak to us." Whitlock called.

"FINE" Masen bellowed causing me to jump again. I had heard him shout before but it still made me jump.

I hated that this was happening but there was nothing I could do about it, he wouldnt talk to me. He was a stubborn ass.

He motioned towards the door with his hand as if to say 'well go on then'.

I looked at him for a moment longer and shook my head before leaving him stand in the bathroom.

I felt as though everything we had worked for over the last few weeks and months had been ruined. He obviously didn't want to hear what I had to say. Was this thing we had worth fighting for? I missed our chats, I missed the way he smiled at me and how he touched me. I missed _him_.

Did I like him? Sure, that much was obvious. Did I want to be with him? _Yes_, I really did. But was all of this worth the heart ache?

Masen was so unpredictable that I never knew where I stood with him. We needed to have a long conversation and work was not the place to do that.

Tempers were running high and I was already over emotional so I decided I would confront him but it wouldn't be at work. I would wait until the shift was over and have my say. And Masen would damn well listen.

Thankfully we didnt have anymore bogus call outs that night. I went out onto the rooftop and looked over at the city.

If anyone had told me a year ago I would be here now and feeling the way I do I would have laughed at them.

I never thought I would... _feel _anything again after Jake. I really did think that he had tainted the way I felt and thought about men but Masen barged into my life with his sex hair and gorgeous eyes and ruined all of that. He turned my life upside down in so many ways. I loved that he was in my life, I just wished things could be simpler.

"Turn that frown upside down princess" Whitlock said with a smile.

I didn't even hear him coming out here.

"Sorry, I was just thinking" I replied.

"I wonder what about?" He replied sarcastically.

I sighed out loud.

"I just dont know where Im going wrong Whitlock. I really like him you know." I told him sadly.

"I know you do. But have you told _him_ that?"

"I thought I had made my feelings pretty obvious". _Hadn't I?_

"Honey, us men are simple. Some more simple than others in McCartys case." I smiled again. "You need to tell him before you lose him."

"What if I've already lost him?" I whispered.

"Just talk to him Bella. You both need to know where you stand."

"What if he doesn't want to listen though?"

"Then he's a bigger idiot than I thought. Bite the bullet and tell him how much you like him."

"Were things this complicated between you and Alice? I asked sadly.

"Nope, not at all. She had no problems telling me she was in love with me." Whitlock smiled brightly at the mention of Alice's name.

"Im not in love with Masen though."

"Aren't you?" He patted me on the arm and left me alone to my thoughts.

Was I in love with Masen? I would know if I was in love with someone... _right_?

I knew what love felt like, I was in love with Jake once.

The feelings I felt for Masen were much stronger than the ones I ever had for Jake but I put that down to the fact that me and Jake were friends first. We gradually fell in love with each other it wasn't like Masen and I.

My head was spinning and I felt even more confused than before.

I made my way down to the rec room where all the guys were sitting watching a football game. I plonked myself down next to Santiago who wrapped his arm around my shoulder and asked if I was ok. I nodded and smiled which of course was a complete lie. I wasn't ok, far from it and the one person I wanted to talk to about it wasn't talking to me.

I looked over at Masen who was laughing at something McCarty had said or done. When he was like this, carefree and happy he was most beautiful.

Our eyes locked and his smile faltered for a minute. The thought that he would never smile at me like that again was too much to bear. I got up and headed downstairs.

I felt like bashing my head against the wall. I just wanted things to be simple and easy, was that too much to ask? I needed to get my shit together, stop acting like such a girl and deal with things. I hated feeling so out of control, I was so used to being the strong one and I had no one to turn to which made things even harder.

"Your upset." I spun round to see Masen standing there with his hands shoved in his pockets rocking back and forth on the heels of his shoes.

"No. Im good" I lied.

"Don't lie to me Bella." He told me.

"I.. I'm not." _Another lie. "_ I just needed some air."

"Air... Right."

"Listen Masen, can we just..."

I never got to finish my sentance as the damn siren starting blaring. We had another fire call.

As the guys flew down the stairs and the pole I ran to the rack, grabbed my turn outs, boots and hat and climbed into the truck.

Within seconds we were flying down the street with Lieu barking instructions at us. Another warehouse fire.

As we approached we could see that the building was in fact on fire, it wasn't a huge one but there was a plume of black smoke filtering from a smashed window on the east side of the premises.

Lieu sent me, Santiago, Whitlock and Masen into the building with breathing apparatus while Soper manned the hose with McCarty.

It was a few kids that had called it in and were currently talking to the police.

"Swan. Come in."

"Go ahead Lieu I said into my radio.

"The 2 kids down here said they heard a woman screaming for help, you might have a vic in there, keep your eyes peeled."

"Will do boss."

The first floor was given the all clear, the fire looked like it had began on the top floor.

"Swan." I heard Masen bellow.

"Yeah?" I yelled back.

"Check the rooms down there. Whitlock, you check the rooms on this side, Im gonna head up to the third floor with Santiago. Head up when they have been cleared.?"

"Sure." I shouted back and headed down the hall way.

Luckily this floor didn't have too much smoke in it. It was pretty easy to see things so if there was a person up here there was a very good chance we would find them.

There were only maybe three or four rooms this side of the floor, maybe offices or something like that. The side walls were covered in windows that had either been smashed or boarded up. The first two were clear, there was no furniture or anything in there. The third room had smashed up chairs and tables all over the place but again no fire or smoke. The fourth room was bare like the first two but was covered in writing, I couldn't really make it out with my mask on. I lifted it to get a better view. At first glance it would appear that a kid with a can of spray paint had been let loose in here, but looking closer I could make out the words.

The entire back wall was covered in the words. "Edward is MINE." I stepped closer and removed the mask completely from my head so I could get a better look. Curiousity had gotten the better of me. I should have known better and got on with my job, I should never have taken my mask off, but it was just too weird.

The words were everywhere, some were written with pen, some with paint.

_What the hell? _

I stupidly thought for a split second the writing was about Masen and then I realised how ridiculous that sounded and turned around to meet up with Whitlock and put this fire out.

As I turned I saw movement out the corner of my eye. My head snapped around but before I saw what it was I felt a sharp pain in the side of my head and then the world went black.

***Hides behind the sofa* Im sooooorrrryyy. Ok Im not really lol. There are only a few chappies left of this story. What the hell is going on?**

**Im already in the process of writing the next chapter but I have 2 kids and its the summer holidays so it might take me a few weeks to get it up.**

**Thank you all so much for being so patient with me, you have no idea how much it means to me.**

**RIP Gabby and Syndea, Cade and Trevor your all always in my thoughts. xxxx**


	21. Author Note

Hi there everyone.

Im so sorry after all this time all you get is an author note but please bear with me.

I've had a couple of PM's regarding Consumed by Fire and it occured to me that I haven't let you all know what's been going on.

A few of you know whats been happening in my RL and it's not been pretty :(

As I mentioned before, I lost 2 wonderful friends last year which completely devastated me, then we moved to a much bigger house and I was without a pc for a while.

Then I got pregnant and OMG I am the crankiest person on the planet when pregnant and severe sciatica/SPD stopped me from being able to sit too long (excuses excuses, I suck I know :( )

So then I gave birth to my amazing little boy Cai and yes I was very sick after having him thanks to a nasty staph infection that just would not go away and then at 6 weeks old my world came grinding to a halt..

Cai stopped breathing and was rushed into hospital where he was eventually found to be in heart failure. He had 3 major heart defects and needed immediate surgery or we would have lost him.

We were in hospital with him for almost 4 weeks which was the hardest of my life, even though the surgery fixed his life threatening problem it still didn't solve everything so my life at the moment consists of cardiologist appointments, dietician appointments, paediactric assessments so I don't have that much time to myself.

BUT, I have started writing CBF again and I PROMISE you despite my hectic life I will get it finished.

Thank you all so much for being so patient and standing by me it means so much.

love you all

Sae xxx


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